Reaching Out by Stephen Tan - HTML preview

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Chapter 10 Starting Off with Simple Balance and Common Sense.

Now that you have understood your purpose and values, it is time to start afresh, like a sprouting leaf amidst the clean morning air in spring. I want to impress on you, that life is simple, but we complicate it, because many of us are chasing wealth, adventure and dreams (Ill be going your way too, providing you the impetus and momentum as we move along). But I dont want you to miss the beginning, the sweet simplicity of life, with all its harmony and inner peace. Pick up any book in the Buddhist religion; much emphasis is on tranquillity and contentment.

Once I watched a boy on TV, riding a giant sea-turtle in the waters of the South Pacific. The scene left a permanent imprint in my mind. Now I surmise that a fisherman in his little boat off Tahiti, may be happier than the high-powered executive at a giant electronic company, churning out TVs, computers and Karaoke sets, and rushing feverishly amids the human and concrete jungles of Tokyo. He needs US$ 0.5million to get a golf club membership; works hard to get away once a year, to fish and snorkel off the beaches of say, Tahiti! He returns to work harder, hoping to retire in a better environment. But he had to trudge a long way, the fisherman was there first! There is happiness in simplicity.

Over the years, I met several people who left lasting impressions in me. They had sparkle in their eyes, contented smiles and gentle, confident ways. Their inner peace radiated patience, tolerance, yet enthusiasm and vitality. They achieved these by harbouring healthy values, and practising relaxation and meditation. They have reduced concern and commitment for the labyrinth of material goods and complex modern lifestyle. They recognise that life is about people, not things. If you are clever, you will emulate them and find joy and peace, not just at the end, but all along the way. They say success and happiness is a manner of travelling, not the destination. So remember to mix work and play en route. Go for the beauty in simplicity, the balance and harmony.

Life is simple, because the ingredients needed for a contented life is quite basic, requiring no great skills or talents. Life becomes complicated when you stop listening to: 1.Your conscience, which is Gods guidance. 2. Common sense, which recognises simple truth, and 3. Cause and effect, which shows there is a reason for everything. Problems also arise when you yield to temptations which draw you to wrongdoing; your state of grace and balance is then disturbed or lost. Life ought to be simple because the cosmic intelligence and forces of Gods universe have set up everything for you. You are already the greatest living miracle! Your lump of grey matter still outsmarts the latest computers. Your brains chemical and electrical energy sends hundreds of impulses and reflexes throughout your body in seconds! Your heart beats 72 times a minute, 2,600 million times in your lifetime without batteries! It pumps 1,800 gallons of blood a day, through 60,000 miles of blood vessels in the body, long enough to wrap several times around the earth! If that is not enough to amaze you, each body is made up of almost 100 trillion tiny cells, containing the magical DNA, which provides the genes to make sisters or twins look alike. Not to forget the good old tummy and other organs, which perform hundreds of functions each day, digesting, filtering, purifying and absorbing foods, and all you need is a couple of hamburgers, drinks, and if you like, a bit of the spinach that Popeye fancies. So what is there for you to complain about? Everything is set up for you!

The wonderful cosmic intelligence is all around you. The bees build 6-sided honeycombs knowing that these compartments merge and stack up better than round ones and store more honey. The spider weaves a nice geometrical web without mathematical lessons. The daffodil hears the oncoming spring and breaks through the soil with its blossom. We could write a million books on these wonders of nature! So do not worry about life, just do your best all the time and occasionally, go and catch a fish, light a fire and drink from the coconut on the beach!

Now you move on confidently, with a clear mind, healthy body and spirit. A great way to enjoy perpetual balance is to form a habit of caringly listening to your body, listening to your mind, and listening to your subconscious. In this way, you derive fuller common sense, and live with better power and control.

Your body constantly conveys to you its physical needs, to operate at full potential. When you are hungry, it is time to eat, when you are thirsty, it is time to drink. People who delayed their lunches and dinners ended up getting gastric problems that gradually developed into stomach ulcers. When it was time for the gastric juices to digest the food, the food wasnt there, and the gastric juices started to nibble the walls of the stomach, causing ulceration eventually. I have observed people like my parents, who kept consistent lunch and dinner times and went on to live very long lives. Your body is like an engine, preferring neat schedules. It lasts longer than those living in confusion. Likewise, when you are tired, it is time to rest or take a cat-nap. It is funny how some people find it hard to relax or sleep, whereas to a cat, a nap is the easiest and most natural thing to do!

Pay attention to your bodys signals which may show overworked or infected systems. These are fatique, irritations, pain, loss of appetite and concentration and other anomalies. Watch out before something serious develops, and attend to alarms before situations deteriorate. I will touch more on health in subsequent chapters. Bear in mind, that nutrition, exercise, rest and relaxation always restore your body to its full operating capacity.

The next thing to do is to listen to your mind. I focus on the mind instead of emotion; because from experience I know that by relying on your mind, you have better control of everything else. When you take care of the mind part, the emotion and its related problems tend to take care of themselves. Sounds neat and cool, doesnt it? We will learn more about this is in the later part of this book. Now, when you listen to your mind and occasionally you are troubled with things like boredom, frustration, jealousy, anger, disappointment, annoyance, worry or fear, you must quickly recognise these as negative feelings, which have ruined human well-being since time began. The things you must do then, are:  1. Switch off these negative feelings instantly and decisively, whenever they occur. If they still linger on, then, 2. Do a complete check, of your purpose, conscience, values, beliefs, attitude, needs, self-confidence, environment, kindness, patience, forgiveness, and so on, and make the necessary adaptations and adjustments with a clear and rational mind.

We will go into details about these feelings in later essays to ensure you are armed to the teeth to face any upset. This is just to give you a preview, of the need to communicate with your body and mind. It is normal to have negative emotions when your needs are not met, such as: Recognition, social contact, peace, recreation, and so on. The negatives and problems disappear when you clearly understand the causes, and make appropriate remedies. So you see, life can be simple, and it should be.

Next, you listen to your subconscious. The subconscious is a big topic to be elaborated later. For now, the skill of listening is basically the development and use of your  Intuition. Intuition is a God-given and effective form of guidance, which helps you to judge and decide on various situations and issues. Experts find that intuition is a very real and practical guide in our lives, even-though it is abstract and hidden. It is truly based on rich experience and information, all collected, digested and stored in your subconscious. You dont realise it is there, but it is. You get that feeling of: „This is not right to me. „I feel thats the way to go. We all feel that nudge at one time or another.

As you grow and gain knowledge and experience, your intuitive power expands. Use it to your advantage. Whenever your intuition is weak, make autosuggestions to strengthen it by saying: „All right decisions exist now inside me, my subconscious guides me day and night. Your subconscious will obey you imperceptibly in due course. Sometimes people ignored intuition, they wanted conscious and courageous control of their lives. It was a show of strength without listening to that Inner Voice, and true enough, they ran into problems. I have personally experienced that myself. Please listen to that inner wisdom, as you grow and progress.

You build a vast reservoir of Common Sense by listening to your body, mind and subconscious. This keeps your feet firmly on the ground, instead of wandering in the clouds. There is nothing magical or mysterious about basic success techniques, which are simple, well tried and proven ways for good living.

Another important skill I want to impart to you, is the ability to enhance your feelings of gratitude and contentment, which in turn bring you inner serenity and equilibrium. These feelings are important and will be further discussed in my next lesson. If you are thankful and satisfied about all the good things around you, you automatically feel happier. Always realise how lucky you are. For myself, I wake up every morning and say: „Almighty God, I cant thank you enough for giving me another new day, because no one knows when he will die, this is a gift I must be thankful for. I cant wait to enjoy every minute ahead of me, for my accomplishment.

The grateful mind is a positive mind, so engrossed in all the good things that it has neither room nor time for anything unpleasant. Another way of achieving contentment is to develop yourself as fully as possible, and fulfil all your potentials. Remember as Epictetus noted: „Everything can be divided into 2 classes, things which are within our control and things over which we have no control, and it is the point of wisdom to live for the one and not let the mind be disturbed by the other. Acceptance, tolerance and contentment are the key to successful living.

My concluding plea is: Please remember always that inner peace comes from harmony with yourself and the world around you, with full submission and satisfaction. You flowwith natures breeze and current. Accept all situations, whether good or bad, they are part of a divine scheme and purpose, of God and His universe. Live life by being your true self, with no pretence or conflict, no fear or worry; by being free of the past, free of any blame or grudge. What counts is your ability to enjoy life at its fullest, in a simple, balanced way, at this very moment.

"Simplicity…It is an integration, a stability, a settledness, a straightforwardness, a purity of the mind that is often expressed in a simpler lifestyle…a more intelligent use of time, less clutter, less financial chaos, fewer involvements - in other words, less world and more peace." - Hugh Prather.

 "The happiest people are those who seem to have no particular reason for being happy, except that they are so." - William Inge.

"Plenty of people miss their share of happiness, not because they never found it, but because they didn't stop to enjoy it." - William Feather.

"The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance; the wise man grows it under his feet." - J. Oppenheim. "Take away the cause, and the effect ceases." - M. de Cervantes.