Chapter 11 Your Mental Attitude.
I consider this essay to be the most essential of the 100 chapters. Please sit up straight and read this carefully, and read this over and over again, in the years ahead.
Today, let us talk about Mental Attitude. It is extremely important because all riches, whether material or intangible riches (like wealth, friendship, knowledge, joy and overall well-being) begin as a state of mind, over which you exercise sole freedom and control. You can tailor your own thoughts and actions towards a fulfilling life, or if you are silly enough, let worry and whining cripple you. Interesting to note, your mental attitude is the offspring of your values and purpose. So a positive mental attitude is the starting point of the good things in your life. This disposition comprises all the desirable ingredients that you must cultivate, such as hope and confidence, integrity and character, enthusiasm and drive, kindness and tolerance, humility and selflessness, courtesy and responsibility, the list goes on.
Your mental attitude towards life will form lifes attitude towards you. It will determine whether you succumb to lifes problems, or you breeze through with triumph and flying colours. Here I am dying to let you hear from a man of immense experience, Mr Jack Addington. In his book 100 Per Cent Mind Power, he recalled counselling over 20,000 troubled people in 36 years, and guess what he had to say? I will tell you later, but someone who has helped more than 20,000 troubled people has certainly mastered most of lifes problems.
He said all those years had taught him one thing: Man is his own worst enemy. Each of his patients thought his predicament was special, yet Mr Addington found that each one had the same problem. Each one had in some way under-valued himself and his ability to succeed. Each one had failed to channel his mind into some meaningful pursuits to gain fulfilment. Each one of them thought many things were against him, when in fact, he was against himself! Each one had neither self-esteem nor purpose, and did not find something to love and work on; instead he blamed the world. There you are, everything in a nutshell!
Mr Addington also made an interesting discovery, that psychology began to work the minute the person was willing to give it a try. As soon as he changed his thinking, took a fresh look and gave clear directions to his inner self, his outer experience began to change! Mr Addington soon developed the technique of SelfDirection - the art of directing the subconscious mind into channels of good use. He said, „That which a person believes about himself, that which he confidently expects and anticipates, will become his experience. The great writer John Milton summed it up nicely: „The mind in its own place, and in itself can make heaven of hell, and hell of heaven. The minute you change your attitude and approach, your environment changes, and the world turns around to befriend and help you. How wonderful! You dont need another lesson from me, least of all 89 more!
Every now and then, problems will pop up in your life and you need a positive mental attitude to rise above them. Let me caution you: Be strong. There will come a time of great challenge, even something of a crisis proportion, where life will be extremely unfair, and your endurance and faith will be pushed to the limits. Be tough and hang on. Many people rise above these tests to become stronger and better people. The weaker ones let these difficult experiences wreck their lives.
Over the years experts have found - and I have learned too in my own experience - that all sufferings had a purpose, which fitted into Gods divine schemes. For example, being often away from my family was a setback, but this boosted my income substantially. My wife and I missed each other more; besides, this has inspired me to write some good letters to my kids, and hence this book for children and youths around the world. All hardships toughen and groom us for the opportunities and greater things ahead, and no one can dispute that. You must taste the bitterness of suffering, to enjoy the sweetness of success.
I read of famous pop singers who survived some of the darkest hours in their younger days. In courtesy, I will not mention names. One of them was down and out and even lost his beautiful girlfriend. He almost killed himself, and had a brief stay in a mental hospital. Later he rebounded with positive attitude and fortitude, and went on to be a rich and famous composer-singer. He later married a more beautiful girl than the one he had lost! Some people have a remarkable ability to rise from their misfortune, and find a meaning that empowers themselves and others. The M.A.D.D. movement, or Mothers Against Drunken Drivers, is an example. After a mother lost her son, she willed to make a change and a difference in the world. The message here is: Use your suffering to empower yourself and others.
I believe fortitude is a significant substance in us. The Oxford dictionary defines fortitude as „courage in pain and adversity. It is recognised as the thing that saves you in desolation. Always press forward with strength. No matter what happens, you take responsibility. This reminds us of great people like Joan of Arc, Sir Winston Churchill, and many others who showed such bravery and resolve.
Another component of our positive mental attitude, which has the wondrous habit of making us happy, is gratitude. People with gratitude are probably the most fortunate in the world, because they are content and thankful for what they have, and they see good in everything, everywhere. This is so important that I devoted one chapter to „finding and seeing good everywhere. Always be grateful for what you have. A person who is oblivious of the goodies around him might just as well be a nail or be dead. Let me land you in a helicopter, into a war and famine zone, like the ones that erupted in Rwanda, or Somalia. Drown yourself in the stench of thousands of dead bodies…among husbands dying in the arms of their wives…collapsing children whose parents were hacked to death in front of them... and you will have a lot more gratitude. So never take your belongings, your brothers, sisters, parents and even your colleagues for granted, shower them with your love, care and interest. You could have been without them, standing injured and forlorn on the African desert. Just reflect on this for a few minutes...
We should be so engulfed by all the good things around us that we have no time for anything unpleasant. When we were young, we stumbled, cried a little and the next minute we were up and engrossed in some new-found games. This is the amazing rebounding ability in children, which adults have lost along the way. Grown-ups are easily swept away by troubles. They should emulate these qualities in kids, who are always expecting the best from their surroundings, taking a few knocks and getting up again to look for more delightful things. Youngsters tend to enjoy every minute of their lives, every game, every nap, every snack and every companionship.
Please keep these 3 words in your permanent success-vocabulary: Attitude, Fortitude, and Gratitude. If your attitude towards the world is good, gracious and grateful, and you feel the world istreating you well, youll get pleasing results. Give your best to the world, the best will come to you. If your demeanour is negative, dont expect any favour or fortune; the universe has no favourites. You can start cultivating the right attitude today, by treating everyone you meet as a precious person. I will cite an example to conclude this chapter: Last week my friend Paul wanted me to choose a new guitar for him. The first shop we entered had a shop assistant who gave us the Idont-thinkyoure-going-to-buy treatment. In the second shop, the sales lady was so fond of us and her guitars... The guitars were almost the same, but you can guess where we bought it from!
"A good mental attitude is even better than mental ability." - Anonymous .
"I have only to do my job, great or small, and look often at the trees and hills and sky, and be friendly with all men." - Grayson.
"Your attitude can: Make you or break you. Heal you or hurt you. Make you friends or make you enemies." - D. E. Galloway.
"All things are ready when the mind is ready." - Shakespeare.
"You should always tell yourself, 'It's not because of my success that I'm content, it's because I was content that I succeed.'" - Alain.
"Make the most of what you have. I operated, full time, on that precept." - Estee Lauder.
"The important and decisive thing in life is not what happens to us, but the attitude we take toward what happens." - Zig Ziglar.