Chapter 16 Love, Kindness, Generosity and Forgiveness.
Today there is so much neglect, hunger, and hostility in the world. That is putting it mildly, pictures and reports from Rwanda and Bosnia can chill my bones and ooze my tears. Recently, there was a newspaper account of Mrs Gores visit to Rwanda. (The wife of Mr Gore, Vice President of USA.) She later picked up a baby who had been numb to peoples gestures. The infant had seen both his parents hacked to death days earlier. He felt so bony, stiff and frigid in her arms. Love was impossible and unknown to this child. I am lucky, I live in one of the worlds best countries, New Zealand. How wonderful! Many of you are equally lucky too; most of you have so much love and joy. We must thank Almighty God, day and night for this.
The same love and kindness that you grew up with could solve much of the worlds problems, if only people would lend a helping hand. Robert Browning the great writer warned us, „Take away love, and our earth is a tomb. Robert Holden concurred when he wrote, „Love is best defined as a universal life-force. Without love, perhaps there could be no life. In Chapter 7, I told you that the richest 20% of the world enjoy 85% of global wealth. Their cups run over and their RollsRoyces, yachts, private jets, and huge mansions often lie idle, gathering dust. One modern-day King even has a 1,000-room palace! Tell me, how many beds can you sleep on at night? Can you even eat $300 worth of food a day? Many millionaires can give away millions of dollars a month and still keep their comfortable lifestyle. Unfortunately, not everyone is a good Samaritan. This will be a better world when the greedy can give to the needy, and when the power of love conquers the love of power.
There is much sorrow and bloodshed around us, it is time we turn hatred into love. It is time everyone has a change of heart. It is time to promote the virtues of kindness, forgiveness and generosity.
Love begins at home and should flow into our workplace and our neighbourhood. If we love our family, our job, the people around us and give our best efforts and services, it is hard not to succeed. One of the many examples is Oprah Winfrey. She revealed that in her regular prayer to God, she offered her life as a vessel for Gods work. She gave much of her wealth, and received more in return! Countless instances, around the world and throughout history, point to a universal law: If you give love, kindness, care and service to your family, employers, colleagues and customers, a fulfilling life is guaranteed. Going that extra mile, winning that extra edge or giving that extra help will make a world of difference. If you give without expecting to receive, you put the world and even God in your debt! You will be rewarded later, and often in a manner beyond your dreams. So be nice to others, your love empowers others, who will empower you in return. If you sow seeds of love and kindness, you will enjoy an endless harvest.
Love begins with our attitude. Kind actions start with kind thoughts. If we have the right attitude, with almost selfless, unconditional love, we want whatever is best for the other peoples well-being and happiness, regardless of our inconvenience and sacrifice. Bear in mind however, that to love is to be vulnerable, because in business relationships, we are open to trickery; and in personal ones, we are exposed to hurt and rejection. We have to be loving but vigilant, strong yet forgiving. Some people are reserved about giving love unless they are reciprocated equally, but what about those without parental and human love? What about that Rwandan child in Mrs Gores arms? How can they learn to reciprocate if people keep deserting them? So it takes efforts, often it will take all our strength and our bleeding hearts, if we want to make the world a better place.
Mother Teresa, the Nobel prize winner, spent most of her life helping the sick and hungry in India. I had a teacher, whose recent funeral almost made the town stand still. For most of his life he regularly visited the sick in hospitals, quietly helped the troubled and gave alms to the poor. This is the greatest love of all, like the divine, infinite love of God, and it is not easy, it requires efforts and sacrifice. You will experience Gods love and power flowing through you, when you give much of yourself to your fellowmen. On the other hand, the loneliest place on earth is probably a human heart without love, the body becomes a tomb.
The above 2 persons lives contrast so sharply with those who exist merely for themselves, with the perpetual thought of: What is in it for me? Sadly, these people harbour the wrong idea that they can only advance in the world at the expense of others. They can, but not for long, believe me. You need not compete or take from others, you just create and add! There are numerous opportunities on this vast planet for introducing and making new things. There are new paintings, books, songs and products emerging everyday. No one can have all the true riches without enriching others. You prosper when you add to prosperity. When you create, produce and provide more, everything multiplies, like the Multiplier effect in economics.
This expansion is not just in tangible goods, but in knowledge, ideas and spiritual well-being. The age of computers, fax machines, mobile phones and Internet have increased the incomes of the world a hundred fold! You are now the creative focal point of the universe, the „multiplication must come from you personally, you have a duty to contribute. Find ways to maximise your abilities, creativity and productivity. There is no need to compete or take from anyone.
Generosity is a wondrous quality, do give more than you receive. It is said that the takers eat better, but the givers sleep better. You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving. Besides physical things, your care and compassion for people cost little, but they are invaluable and have great impact. Often your kind words and deeds can make a big difference in someones life, someone among your family, colleagues, friends or even strangers. That person may even catch on to your virtues and pass them on to others! I now recall an incident, where my wife gave some money to a poorer relative and upon her return, she won a new TV at a lucky draw. The more you give, the more you have.
Victor Hugo gave a beautiful description when he wrote, „Life is the flower of which love is the honey. All great religions in the world instil and incite love, kindness, generosity and forgiveness. We cultivate these virtues by being more open, demonstrative and less selfish. Furthermore, we accept others with their imperfections and weaknesses, which are after all, parts of the variety of life. We learn to be patient with others, forgiving them for their wrong. Remember the saying: To err is human, to forgive divine? If we cannot forgive how can love survive, or even exist? Do not allow any negative feeling or grudge to occur, or worse, to take roots; just voice your annoyance and let it pass. Kindness is the ability to love people more than they actually deserve. It is the consideration and awareness for other peoples feelings, difficulties and needs, with tolerance and forgiveness. It is like an oil that takes the friction out of life. How beautiful is a day, touched by kindness!
Consistent demonstration of love erases hostility and negative emotions. As you change your thoughts and gestures towards others, they change towards you. Forgiveness melts resentment, anger and selfishness. It warms the heart and cools the sting! It saves your energy too, and life is too short to waste it on gloom and glumness. So forgive, and in the end you will feel relief and joy. I have lived long enough to know that too well!
In concluding, I must remind you to love and take special care of yourself too. Can we truly love others before we learn to love ourselves? Before we have health, peace, self-acceptance and contentment? The excellence of your interaction with the world will only be as good as the quality of your relationship with yourself. This lesson is an important part of happiness. Happiness is a mental attitude, a grateful spirit, and a heart full of love!
"In the final analysis we must love in order not to fall ill." - Freud.
"Duty makes us do things well, but love makes us do them beautifully." Anonymous.
"The best portion of a good man's life is his little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and of love." - Wordsworth..
"Give what you have, to some it may be better than you think." - Longfellow.
"We can cure physical diseases with medicines but the only cure for loneliness, despair and helplessness is love." - Mother Teresa, one of the world's most revered women.