“If You Don't Have a Dream, How Are You Going
to Make Your Dreams Come True? ”
It all starts with a dream...
Let me tell you up front that if you do not have a dream, you will
not become a millionaire other than by winning a game of chance. It's
just too hard.
To make this kind of money you need to be laser-beam focused,
and you can't be that if you only have a half-hearted interest in what
you are doing. You know this is true.
How? Just look at some famous multimillionaires who still keep
working ten or twelve hours a day, even though they don't need the
money.
Why do they do this? Because they have a passion for what they
do. They would probably do it without payment!
Dreaming is a type of visualisation. It is visualisation plus passion.
These are the things that you really want to be, to have or to do. If
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Do You Sincerely Want to be Rich?
you do not achieve these things over (say) the next ten years, you are
going to be seriously disillusioned and upset.
You should be able to write a list of six such things. If you cannot
think of a single one then you are most unlikely ever to live a life of
power and passion. Also, your chances of making big money are
vanishingly small. If you like, this is your first reality check.
Can you think of a few things about which you are passionate?
One or two things which you care deeply about? Just one would be a
start.
Don't beat yourself up if you cannot immediately think of
something. It is hard to dream up a better life for yourself due to the
decades of negative conditioning you have allowed yourself to accept.
How often did your teachers, parents and friends encourage you to
dream and ask you to share your vision with them? Approximately
never? I thought so! How often did someone shoot your fledgling
dreams down in flames or pour scorn upon them? Small wonder that
your dreams are not on public display.
The Future You
Here is a little exercise which might help.
Imagine walking into a room and meeting the 'you' of ten years
from now. What will you be wearing? Where will you be living?
What will your lifestyle be like? What car will you be driving? Will
you be running a business? If so, how successful will you be? What
will your net worth be?
You really only have three choices here about how the ‘you of the
future’ will look, and this is where the power of this exercise lies:
1. Somewhere in between how you are now, and a depressed, broke
and scruffy tramp.
2. An exact clone of how you are now - absolutely nothing has
changed in a decade.
3. A happier, wealthier, healthier version of the ‘you of today.’
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Do You Sincerely Want to be Rich?
Only a suicidal depressive would visualise number one. Number
two is effectively saying that nothing will change; you will not grow
over the next ten years, you will not get richer, happier, wiser,
healthier - anything. The 'you of tomorrow' will be indistinguishable
from the 'you of today.'
So that just leaves number three, and if you selected this it remains
for you to back this glittering vision of the 'future you' with all the
force of your imagination.
Having imagined how you will be in the next ten years, here is a
really neat to trick to help you achieve it.
Ask yourself the following questions:
“What do I need to achieve in the next 12 months in order to
make my future dream a reality?”
“What do I need to do in the next month to start myself on this
journey?”
“What can I do by next week to prepare myself for the journey?”
“What can I do right now, today, in order to start this process
off?”
Do you see how this works?
You need to dream, but this is not enough. Dreams come a size too
large so that you can grow into them and this means that dreams are
too large to realise all at once.
Our minds are finite, and so all large projects must be broken down
into bite-sized chunks otherwise we become discouraged by the scale
of the endeavour. This is one of the secret keys of successful people.
They are undaunted by large projects, because they have the knack of
breaking them down into simple steps. Each step is easily
manageable, and can be completed in anything from a few hours to a
few weeks.
In contrast, it is useful to analyse the situation of people who are
stuck, both monetarily and in spirit, if only to allow you to avoid
these errors. This is based on my experience of two decades of
dealing with both winners and temporary losers in the game of life.
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Do You Sincerely Want to be Rich?
1. They are frightened. Their lives are dominated by fear. They see
the world as a scary, threatening place and crave security, dullness,
mediocrity. They long for every day to be the same as the last and
become scared and upset if even a small change breaks the monotony
of their days.
2. They completely lack visualisation ability. If asked to visualise
their future self, they would stare at you blankly. They are not
pretending. They do not even understand what you mean by this
exercise. If you force them to try, they'll come back with nothing
more than a shrug.
3. Assuming that you could drag some sort of dream out of them (for
example wanting to be worth a million pounds some day) then they
would be wholly incapable of working backwards from that point to
the present, and suggesting actions they might have to take in order to
make this come about. Again, they are not faking. There is now; there
is the future; and in between, a yawning, fathomless chasm - a blank.
4. Even if you were to write the steps out, 1-100, with a check box
next to each one, they absolutely lack the discipline even to start on
the task, let alone complete the steps. At the first slight downfall, or
negative comment from a friend, they will give up. In any situation
which requires a choice between working for a better future, and
instant gratification now, they will unfailingly choose instant
gratification.
But this is not you, hopefully. If you recognise yourself here, then
don't worry because it is possible to change and get out of this 'stuck'
pattern you are in.
You need to develop the habits of a winner. You want to enjoy
today, but have an even better tomorrow waiting for you. To do this
you must model yourself on winners - people who have achieved
great things in their lives. I am talking here about 'winners' and 'losers'
but I do not mean the term 'loser' in the usual derogatory sense. By a
'loser' I mean someone who, by their own definition of winning and
losing, is falling well short of where they want to be. By a 'winner' I
mean someone who, by their own definition of winning and losing, is
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Do You Sincerely Want to be Rich?
pulling ahead of the game and achieving that which they set out to
achieve.
This is how a winner operates:
1. They are brave. Like all human beings they feel fear, but have
mastered it and are able to rise above it. Whilst they acknowledge that
there are frightening people and places in the world, in general they
view the world as a benevolent place, full of great opportunities and
wonderful people. This is a vital principle. Winners view the world as
mainly benevolent with some bad bits. Losers see the world as mainly
malevolent with some good bits.
2. They are good visualisers. They have the ability to imagine the
future, often in glorious Technicolor detail. They have high self-
esteem, and know that they are worth more than they have at present.
Life to them is an exciting adventure to be lived to the full. In
contrast, losers view life as a terrible chore to be somehow 'got
through' with as little pain as possible.
3. They are intelligent, rational and logical. If they have a dream of
the future, they know the secret technique for making this happen.
Today's dreams are tomorrow's realities. They know that large
projects cannot be tackled by finite human minds unless they are
broken down into manageable, bite-sized pieces. They are able to
work backwards from a future dream to the present day, and to list the
logical steps required to make that dream come true.
4. Having written down the steps required to achieve their goals, they
know what is required next. Action. Up until this point, all of their
plans amount to little more than ethereal hot air. It is action which
grounds the circuit and allows the current to flow. They know that the
journey will be long and hard. Any worthwhile dream will involve
hard work, concentrated effort and some suffering to attain. They
need one more quality. Discipline. This keeps them going during
setbacks, when the list seems too long, and when others heap mirth
and derision upon their efforts.
Five Tips to Turbo-Charge Your Dream
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Do You Sincerely Want to be Rich?
1. Dream of a brighter tomorrow. Your yearning power is more
important than your earning power.
2. Be rational. Mysticism is your mortal enemy. There are obvious,
logical steps between here and your dreams. Write them down in bite-
sized chunks and follow them like a route map.
3. Act. All is dust without action. Action is the key.
4. Be disciplined. Life is tough. Fight. Others want you to fail. Ignore
them. The world is against you - go your own way. People will spout
rubbish - ignore it.
5. Start today. Procrastination is the thief of time. Winners start right
now. Losers chatter to themselves that they will start 'one day real
soon.' It never happens.
Hierarchy of Needs
All dreams are driven by your needs. This might be your need for
approval, recognition, status, safety, love, food, shelter - or any one of
a hundred different needs. So when thinking about your dreams, I
want you to remember this concept called the hierarchy of needs - you
might have come across this before. It goes like this:
When life is a desperate struggle, we are overwhelmingly
consumed with the desire for food. Every waking moment is spent in
pursuit of nourishment. Nothing else matters. We scrabble the earth
from dawn until dusk with little on our mind apart from the thrill of
discovering another root or berry. There is little time for philosophy
or self fulfilment. We work, we sleep, we eat - if we're lucky.
Food is the first need, assuming we have basics such as air and
water. If, due to man's ingenuity, we manage to crack the food supply
problem, our next need becomes shelter and warmth - somewhere
cosy to lay our heads at night. If we achieve all of these things, the
next thing we seek is love and belongingness.
And after that?
Recognition, self-esteem and the esteem of our peers.
This is a very important realisation for you. It is very likely that
you already have air, water, sufficient food, a roof over your head, a
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Do You Sincerely Want to be Rich?
modest amount of money, and a certain amount of love and
friendship. Therefore your dreams will almost certainly reflect your
next need on the list which is your desire for recognition, self-esteem,
admiration, respect, fame, achievement, etc.
If you want ten million pounds, then this is almost certainly
because you want to be somebody and have the respect and
admiration of society, not because you need a larger roof over your
head or extra food.
As an interesting aside, the modern phenomenon of the serial killer
coincides exactly with a period when, for the first time in history,
most people have adequate food, shelter and warmth. Next in the
hierarchy of needs comes love, which we will assume is thwarted for
some reason. So the next higher need is recognition. Or, in the case of
the criminal, notoriety. Most serial killers when caught and
questioned, mentioned that one motivating factor was the desire to be
somebody - a rare motive in crimes from previous centuries. Paul
John Knowles who embarked upon a random killing spree in 1972,
claiming the lives of at least 24 victims, declared himself to be “the
only successful member of my family” and positively basked in the
media attention after his arrest. He was subsequently shot dead by an
FBI agent whilst trying to grab a gun after a court appearance.
Recognising your desire for adulation, fame, infamy - call it what
you will - helps to clear your head and focus your mind more firmly
on your goals. It can also help you to detect erroneous or incorrect
dreams. Yes, there are such things as incorrect dreams. I would define
this as a dream which is an overly complex or grandiose strategy for
filling a simple need, when a far simpler (and more achievable)
strategy might suffice.
Achieving a net worth of ten million pounds is actually a difficult
task and one which will exercise you for the next ten or twenty years.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with this, if it is what you really
desire. But if this dream is being driven by a craving for recognition,
admiration or respect then there may be an easier way of satisfying
your desires without going through the twenty years of grief required
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Do You Sincerely Want to be Rich?
to amass ten million. Perhaps you can get the recognition you crave in
some other simpler way by writing a book, appearing on television,
being a star in your local community or any one of a hundred easier
ways. It's just something for you to think about.
Once you understand that it is our need for recognition, not money,
which drives most people in an affluent Western society, you will be
less puzzled by the things that are going on around you. The rise in
crime and delinquency is not caused by poverty, it is caused by tens
of thousands of petty crooks wanting to ‘be somebody,’ or ‘teach
society a lesson’ or to 'get respect' - they are, if you like, ego crimes
not fiscal crimes.
A century ago most crime was survival crime. People stole to eat.
Vandalism was almost unknown. A vandal leaves his or her mark on
the furniture of society - it is a statement of ego.
The dramatic rise in divorce rate has little to do with people being
worse husbands or wives these days, compared with the past. If
anything, they are a lot better. It is driven by people's desire for
recognition. They want to be appreciated. They are not prepared to
suffer the drudgery of marriage without reward. A century ago this
would have been unthinkable. You got on with it because the survival
of your family was at stake. Your precious thoughts of wanting
appreciation were inconsequential in the scrabble for plain survival.
Look at advertising on television. Most products are sold on the
basis of raising your self-esteem, not on the benefits of the product.
Most adverts these days have the hidden message 'be somebody.'
So learn to look at your dreams with a critical eye. Ask yourself
what the underlying need is behind the dream and then ask yourself if
this is the only way you can achieve it. Don't get fixated on the actual
method or strategy of getting the need met; often there are many
different ways of achieving satisfaction. First work out what the
actual need is, and then plan the simplest, most realistic strategy for
meeting it.
Many people struggle throughout their lives to make big money
only to find that when they have got it, they still feel hollow and
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Do You Sincerely Want to be Rich?
empty. This is because the money was just a symbol for the
underlying need - which still hasn't been met. A classic case would be
a woman who sacrifices everything to reach the top of her profession
and make a lot of money, only to realise that she has spent twenty
years trying to gain her father's approval and love and this was the
way she thought she could get it! What a hard route - and it didn't
work! If only she had recognised the underlying need (for approval
and love) and considered some alternative strategies, any one of
which could have been far easier than the struggle she put herself
through.
How To Discover Your Dream
I would like to recommend an excellent book which will help you
to discover your hidden dreams - those you have locked away since
childhood and dismissed as 'impractical.'
The book is called "I Could Do Anything if Only I Knew What it
Was" by Barbara Sher. Isn't that a great title? It is published by Dell
Trade (nothing to do with the computer company) and the ISBN
number is 0-440-50500-3.
This book seems to come in and out of print, so you might need to
find a second-hand copy. She has written several similar books, all of
which are worth reading. My copy came from Waterstones priced
£7.99.
As the title suggests , "I Could Do Anything" is a book about life-
planning. I have read several books on this subject over the years, and
to be honest, most are a bit of a yawn. Although they contain a few
nuggets of useful information, and the odd pointer to a better, brighter
life, they are usually dull and uninspiring. They also tend to contain
tedious exercises such as this:
"Take a sheet of A4 paper, and down the left-hand side list 37
emotions ranging from apathy to anger. Now down the right-hand
side of the paper, write about 37 episodes in your life when you were
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Do You Sincerely Want to be Rich?
feeling each of these emotions. Recall your experience in vivid detail.
Remember what you were doing and who you were with."
Sure...right... I'll do that when I've got the odd spare week and the
attic doesn't need clearing out or the drains degreasing... In contrast,
Barbara's book contains only a handful of exercises, all of which are
quick and easy to do.
There is one exercise, which I will share with you in this chapter,
which is quite simply the most powerful life planning exercise I have
ever come across. Completing this exercise will cause a profound
change in your life, and will give you an amazing insight into exactly
what you should be doing. This probably is not what you are doing
now.
But first, let me pause for a moment and say something which is,
admittedly, not very cheerful.
I believe that most people are suffering from low level depression.
Take a look around you. How many people do you know who are
genuinely happy and fulfilled? Don't get me wrong, I am not saying
that most people are terminally depressed or suicidal. People get by.
They cope. Life jogs on. But I think you will agree that few people
are motivated, passionate and happy.
Statistics back up what I am saying. Over five million people in the
UK take antidepressants daily in order to cope. That's a stunning
figure.
So what is the cause of all this unhappiness? Surely not money.
The rich and poor alike queue at the prescription counter of the local
chemist. I can tell you as a straight fact that money does not guarantee
happiness. Money merely gives you choices.
Let me tell you what I think is one of the largest contributory
causes. It is the fact that people are not following their own personal
dream. Worse, most people do not have the faintest inkling of what
that dream might be, or even that such a dream might exist. Like so
many rusty, disused railway wagons they were shunted off the main
line many years ago and now find themselves standing in some
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remote siding, far away from the clear, straight lines used by express
trains, and with innumerable points and crossovers lying between
them and their intended track.
Let's face facts, most people are living somebody else's life, not
their own. The shunting operations started early, usually at school.
Most schools have a slick statement in their brochure which
goes something like this: "We at xyz school believe that each
child is an individual. We believe in nurturing that precious
individuality so that the child may fully express their own