An introduction that isn't an introduction
Firstly, welcome along. It’s a good thing that you've done purchasing this course. Now then - I’m really not that keen on those introductory chapters of books that explain to you why you're not getting any sex, why the author wrote the book, who the book's for, etc. etc. at the end of the day you just want to get on with it and I'm really pretty sure that you don't give a monkeys why I wrote this course so I'm not going to repeat it here (but if you do really want to know - then this is all on our website at http://www.getmore-getbetter.com). The one thing that I do want to say in this paragraph though is to please finish to the end of this introductory day one. It will explain to you how the course works, and you will need to know that, otherwise you'll start reading it and you won't have a clue how the things going to work, so quite possibly it just won’t work for you. So be patient and read the thing.
Okay, thank you, now let’s get on with it…
This is worth knowing…
Most of the stuff in this course is basically just good common sense stuff, and you may have read a lot of it before - and I'm not going to pretend otherwise. I am no scientist or doctor, and I certainly am not claiming to have all the answers, or indeed a mountain of hard data to back them up, this course is written by a man on his own search. I’ve read a lot of stuff over the past 3 years, asked a lot of questions, tried a lot of stuff out, failed a lot, tried again, etc. and as a result I feel that know about the problems that you face getting your partner into bed and, more importantly, I feel that I know how to solve them.
Secondly - you will need to have the desire to do something about your situation – true desire – but we’ll get to that in the “what is this going to take” section in a moment.
This is a course with solutions, not problems - so you won’t find much in here about safe sex. If you are young, free and single, and are desperate to push your sexual boundaries then this course is very likely not for you. This course is for the man in a long term relationship who simply wants to have more sex with the lady that he’s with. And you’ve probably been with that person for quite a long time.
How does the course work?
Get More, Get Better is an 8 week course divided into 38 daily parts.
It isn’t aimed at being something that you and your partner work on together; it’s something that you will work on, on your own.
It makes the assumption that the typical chap taking the course doesn’t have a huge amount of time on his hands, so that’s why it will take approximately 20 minutes of your time each day to read the main course content.
It is designed to be listened to just 5 days of the week for the full 8 weeks. Why just 5 days of the week? Well, I tried to work out where you'd take your 20 minutes. And I arrived at the conclusion that it was likely that men would read the course away from their partners and family, maybe on the commute to work or on a lunch break in a quiet corner somewhere, and not when at home on a typical two day weekend or your days off. Hence the reason why its 5 days a week.
I recommend that you develop a routine to study the course at the same time for 20 minutes 5 days a week. This controlled approach will give you the time to digest each topic that is given to you and to combine it with the daily exercises.
Now I'm not going to pretend that all you've got to do is to read something for 20 minutes, 5 days a week for 8 weeks and you’ll magically get more sex with your partner. Nope, sorry, obviously that’s just the reading bit, the follow up stuff you'll have to do is definitely going to take you longer than 20 minutes per day, and this follow up stuff takes the form of exercises that you are asked to complete each day.
The exercises are designed to get you working on what you’ve learnt that day in order to cement the learning in your head, but also as a steady drip feed of information over time, rather than great chunks of information being thrown at you all at once. For example - the course includes 61 ‘Getting better at sex’ tips – so rather than reeling off all 61 at you at once they are given to you two per day, with the thought that: Less information overload = More goes into your head.
The summary and exercises for each day are on separate pages, so that (assuming you've purchased a printable version of this course) they can be printed out and carried round with you for the day. And then, when you get a second or two in your hectic schedule you can keep reminding yourself of what you’ve learnt and what you’ve got to do that day by way of the exercises.
The course does a lot of repetition; during days 2 to 21 you’ll have the same content repeated at you four times…
Each new topic is given to you in its full detail.
Then the topic is summed up at the end of the day.
At the end of each day you’ll be given exercises to work, some or all of which will be based on the topics you’ve learnt about that day.
And the following day I summarise the content learnt the previous day and follow up by asking you how you got on with the exercises.
So why does it work this way? Simply because there’s a lot of content to learn in the course and because I feel that repetition is a tried and tested method of learning.
One of the key underlying principles of the course is about improving your relationship with your partner. So, for what may seem like quite a while, I talk about things that may well appear to you to have nothing whatsoever to do with you getting more sex. So to begin with you will just need to bear with it, believe that it is going to work, try it out and see if it works for you.
I’ll keep on bringing the learning back round to the reason why you purchased this course – to get more sex. I feel that this is an important thing to do so that you are regularly reminded that we are continuing to focus on your end goal.
I’m no doctor or hypnotist, so there’s no physco babble here, no weirdy nonsense trying to hypnotise your partner into getting her into bed – I’m just an ordinary chap on a mission for answers. So all of the tips are…
Simply - good, common sense ideas, that you probably just wouldn’t otherwise have thought of.
They’re all what I call “blokerized” – they are written by a man, for men.
Each of the topics has been put into the right, no offence, idiot-proof, order so that you do the right stuff at the right time to get you more sex.
The course is not going to be a one sized fits all approach - if something works then great, make a mental note of it, or keep a journal in order to remember it, but if it doesn’t work, then okay, you’ve tried it, well done for trying it, then just move on to the next idea and try that one.
Okay, that’s a lot of stuff about how it works! So, before we go any further I want to give you the structure of the thing, right up front here and now. This is the formula of how you are going to get more sex with your partner…
Ground rules - firstly you are going to be told a load of stuff to stop doing, mainly to ensure that you aren’t doing stuff that’s going to potentially be totally putting your partner off of sex with you. So for some readers this could be a really hard section. Why? Well - if you are currently doing a load of the stuff that I’m going to suggest that you stop - then you'll have a lot of work to do and this section could be quite tough, but for other readers it might be a total breeze.
Laying down some good foundations – secondly you are going to get told a load of stuff to start doing. If we compare the process of you getting more sex with the process of building a new apartment block then section 1, ‘Ground rules ’, above was doing the ground clearance, taking away all of the bad stuff in the soil, and this section is about laying down the good, solid, concrete foundations for the building. It’s about giving you the positive stuff that you’ve got to start doing for your relationship in order to start the process of getting more sex.
Getting you out of the ‘dull sex’ rut – now then chaps – it’s worth knowing that potentially your partner isn't going to be massively enthused about leaping into bed with you for the same, dull old sex! So, taking into account the fact that the course is called Get More, Get Better, here I introduce the first of the ‘getting better at sex tips’, then over the remainder of the course you will slowly (at a rate of two tips per day) be fed the tips on how to improve your sexual repertoire.
Daily to do's – the daily to-do’s strengthen this apartment block we’re constructing – this section is all about suggesting things that you should be doing for your partner, your relationship, your home and your family which will basically make it easier for you to get sex when you want it. On the face of it this doesn’t sound like it will get you more sex, I know, but it really will…
Weekly to do's – the weekly to-do’s section is mainly about a concept that you may already have heard of called ‘date night’ – I won’t go into detail here, but ‘date night’ is a great concept which will assist you in strengthening your relationship and which will also give you a great opportunity to initiate sex with your partner.
Monthly to do's – the monthly to-do’s section suggests further things that you should be doing, again in order to strengthen your relationship, but which also gives you some really great opportunities to initiate sex.
When you want sex to do's – this section is about giving you ideas, tips and a strategy for how to initiate sex with your partner. We look at; how to create opportunities for sex, how to spot good potential opportunities to initiate sex, as well as giving you a checklist of stuff to tick off before you even think about bothering to try initiating sex.
I give you some tips on how to keep things going – by this stage you’ll have learnt a lot of really good stuff, so in this section you get some ideas for how to ensure that you keep things going. This section is designed to be referred to again and again, to keep your mind refreshed with everything that you’ve learnt in the course.
And finally - I’ll give you some pointers for what you can do if none of the stuff in the course has worked – so that you’ve got some pointers in the right direction of where to turn next.
And that's it! That’s the formula for getting you more sex with your partner.
How long is this going to take?
The answer should really be - “that’s up to you”, because it all depends on how much effort you put in. But if we assume the following…
You can spare around 20 minutes a day, 5 days a week, to read the course.
That you make a commitment to yourself that in those 20 minutes you'll take in what you are reading and that you don’t just let it all wash over you as you read.
That you put in the required effort. Just reading isn't enough I’m afraid. Having read stuff, you’ve then got to go and actually act on it all and do the exercises that you are set.
That you aren’t a malicious arse, who has damaged your partner so much that actually it’s more likely to take six months just to repair the damage you've done to her mental wellbeing, let alone the time that it will take to get her back into the right place to want to have sex with you.
…then…
You should know enough by the end of day 17 to understand what you’ve got to do to seduce your partner into bed and how to do so more often.
And by the end of the course, ie in 8 weeks (or 38 days worth of reading and exercises) you should be in a really great place in terms of…
Your knowledge and understanding of the seduction process that you will have practised and cemented your learning on through the exercises.
Your partner wanting to come back to bed with you more often because you'll have learnt some great tips on ways that you can pleasure her when you do get her into bed.
But having said all that, it really is up to you in terms of the amount of time that it will take, because it requires effort on your part, so with that in mind…
What is it going to take?
To succeed in this course, ie you getting more regular, and better, sex with your partner - this is what it’s going to take…
You quitting with your moaning
Okay then, first off, a potentially rather harsh reality check that I am not going to apologise for – if you have been droning on and on with a load of dejected, lame, self-pitying, sorry arse moans and complaints about your lack of a sex life then you’ll need to quit with this. Ouch. Okay, I probably need to explain why I’m short on sympathy. Well, unfortunately the evidence appears to suggest that most men in long term relationships wouldn’t know decent advice on sex if it slapped them in the face, or potentially worse, they won’t even bother to actually listen. Instead they find it a whole lot easier to moan and whinge about the issue, that’s why. So this is absolutely going to take (a) you quitting your whinging, (b) you listening to this stuff and then (c) you acting on it.
An understanding that you HAVE got the time for this
If a decent sex life is important to you and your partner then you absolutely have got the time for it. Unless you happen to be an alien from another planet with some clever time shifting technology then you have just as many hours in the day as everyone else on this planet –it’s about how you choose to spend those hours. So if you want more regular sex with your partner make it a priority and assign it some importance.
A realisation that, more than likely, you have NO excuses
Now then, before I say this next bit I’m going to make the assumption that you’ve read the “Causes of low sexual desire” appendix at the end of this eBook (or this same section on our website) and that you’ve discovered no underlying issues with either you or your partner from what you’ve read. Assuming that all is good then - I need to tell you that you really don’t have any excuses for your lack of sex life. And you’ve possibly even made up a load of really rubbish ones as well… “we've got kids”, “she’s always too tired”, “we’re always so busy”, “we never have any time”, “my job is hellish”, “we’ve been married forever and a day and the lusts all gone”, or “my wife’s to blame as well you know”. etc. etc. I’m sorry, but you are wrong – your sex life is absolutely there for the taking – go get it.
You being a lot less lazy
This is very likely to take you being a whole lot less lazy. I'm hoping that you are; a healthy man, potentially in your prime, and that, more than likely you are either married or in a committed long term relationship also with a healthy partner, again potentially in her prime. So age, infirmity, or illness is more than likely not the problem here. No, it’s actually way more likely to be your laziness. Yes, that is what I said, laziness. Because, unfortunately, most of the time in life if you want something, you can mostly never expect it to be presented to you on a plate, you've got to go and get it. Keep reading and I’ll help you out with the ‘how to go and get it’ bit, but I will need you to stop being a lazy arse.
You getting used to one rather dull rule of life that men have to suffer with
Have a read of this and see what you think…
It is a rather unfortunate rule in life that women make all the decisions and that blokes just say ‘yes’ and go along with it.
Your partner may well let you think that you are getting your way the whole time, because otherwise it could well hurt your really fragile male ego.
This course won’t hide the fact that it’s getting you to do all the hard work when trying to seduce your partner into bed, but then it's actually your partner who will do all of the agreeing to submit to you at every step; from that very first sparkle in her eye to her ultimately surrendering to you sexually. Think back to when you first met your partner, was it her choice to make the decisions at every stage?…
She will have sent you the initial “it’s ok to approach me” signal that meant that she was willing to hear you out for a moment or two.
Then she decided whether or not she was going to grace you with her phone number.
Then she may have agreed to a first date with you.
Then if you were lucky she also agreed to date you a second time.
Then she may have beckoned you in for your first kiss together.
And then several days or maybe even weeks, later she will have allowed further escalation to some passionate kissing and touching.
And then finally she gave the permission for some sex, she let you take her clothes off and you got an ok to enter her.
The idea that you are in charge of everything is purely an illusion which sticks around only because the rules of the world appear to request it.
If you are struggling to get this stuff then rejection could likely come your way full on in the face if you charge in trying to get sex with your partner without first having seduced her into giving you that ‘green for go’ signal.
That elusive ‘green for go’ signal just won’t come out if all you do is hang around waiting for it.
Again, ouch! What’s the answer to this? Easy; tell yourself that “hey, that’s life as a man – there are good bits too”, and then just get over it and get on with what you’ve got to do. And yes, this course will give you the ‘what you’ve got to do’ bit.
You shifting your thinking
You may feel that some of the tips, ideas and suggestions in this course will make you feel like you are losing control to your partner. So what is needed from you please is a change in your thinking; you are not losing control, instead - you are actually gaining control. You are gaining control of how to seduce your partner and how to tackle the issues that occur whilst doing so. You’re going to be a better man for having taken on board the tips in this course and having made the effort to go out and do something with them. It’s highly likely that, actually, your partner does want to have sex with you, and that she's not being purposefully mean to you by rejecting you for sex the whole time (unless of course you are being really horrible to her), and instead all that is really needed is that you just have to help her get into the right place to want to have sex with you.
You quitting the assumption that regular sex in a long term relationship is a given
This is also going to take you coming to the realisation that sex in a long term relationship is not just a given. Yes, this IS really rubbish, I do agree – you are being asked to put all of this effort in just to get some sex. Wouldn’t it be great if your partner wanted sex as often as you do? And wouldn’t it be even better if she wanted the kind of sex that you’d probably like? It would indeed, but that’s more than likely not the reality in your situation, and there’s no getting away from this. Let's say worst case you left your partner to go off and have an affair, even if you did take this drastic step would you find a female partner who wants sex as much as you do? Sorry chaps – but the answers probably no (or at least not after the initial infatuation period had ended anyway). So like it or lump it you will need to put in the effort to get the results that you want. Sex will rarely simply present itself to you. Getting the regular sex with your partner that you’d like will require a combination of the following…
Effort
Hard work
Some clever figuring out of lots of stuff
Inventiveness
Courage
Trial and error
A firm belief in yourself and your abilities
If you want more regular sex with your partner then you need to be prepared to do whatever it takes to achieve your objective. It’s likely you’ve done this loads of times in other areas, be it; at work on a particular project, organising a night out with your male friends, getting through those first 12 weeks of having kids, you’ve potentially even rearranged and overturned your entire life just to get a golfing weekend sorted – so you can do this stuff – it’s all mind over matter, so with that in mind!...
You opening your mind
You will need to open your mind. Why? Because there will be a lot of stuff in here that you will not be used to and that you may be really sceptical about initially. In the next section I’m going to tell you not to believe anything that you read until you’ve tried it – so this may help a little with all you sceptics out there – but what you will need to do is to approach this course with an open mind (alongside all that hard work and dedication that you need to be putting in too of course).
A realisation that there’s no magic, quick fix, formula
Now then – what I’m not claiming with this course is that I’ve discovered some new magical, quick fix solution to getting your partner into bed, all of the content in the course is just good common sense stuff. So it’s also well worth knowing that there are no shortcuts to any place that is worth going to – and hopefully you’ll agree that more and better sex with your partner is a place that is worth going to.
Yes, this course will take you time to get through, but it’s just one of those compromises that you are going to have to make, there really is no getting around this one. And yes, it will ask you to spend lots more time with your partner as well, but surely spending more time with your partner is a good thing anyway, isn’t it?
An understanding that this is going to take hard work and commitment
I probably don’t need to repeat this one again, but just in case you haven’t got it yet – depending on what your current situation is this process is fairly likely to take both hard work and commitment from you – and most especially if you are currently doing a lot of the things that I am going to suggest that you stop doing. If you are in a good place with your relationship generally then it should be a whole lot easier, but whatever your current relationship situation please bear with every single tip, idea and exercise, and keep on reading them all, and never skip stuff, otherwise you may miss an important part of what is really quite a complex jigsaw puzzle.
An understanding from you that there may be some changes that you’ll need to make
There is no getting away from the fact that this course is very likely to be suggesting that you make some changes to the way that you go about your interactions with your partner. I’m going to leave what those types of changes might be to the main course content, and it also really depends on your current relationship situation. But what you’ll need to decide when you are reading the course is - what are the acceptable changes to you in order for you to get more sex. Having said that however, none of the things that I suggest in the course are really that awful (in my humble opinion), and they are all things that will ultimately help you to get more of what you want and to improve your relationship. And who wouldn’t want a better relationship with the person you’ve married or have committed to being with?
A change in your attitude
Again, depending on your situation you may well need to be prepared to allow your attitude to your partner, and possibly your attitudes in general, to change in order for some of the tips in this course to work. Because if you don’t then it’s quite possible that you simply won’t be open enough to the suggestions in this course for them to filter in and for them to have the desired positive effect.
You watching less porn
It may be that you need to take a good look at your porn habit, assuming of course that you have one. If you don’t have one then it’s okay to move on, there’s nothing to see here. But, if you can honestly say that your porn habit is causing an issue with either your relationship or the way that you view sex then it may well be worth trying to wean yourself o