Start acknowledging your inner child’s shortcomings and take responsibility for changing the world of your inner child. If we start effectively nurturing our inner child, then we will be able to live our lives wonderfully.
10
"What is more personal is the most universal" – Carl R.
Rogers
hat makes our mind unswaggy? Guess
because you probably already know it.
W
Insecurities, fear, guilt, shame are the unswaggy side of the mind. In short, ‘any mental barrier’ that holds us back is unswaggy. When we don't believe in our abilities, then the unswaggy side of our mind becomes dominant, and so the quality of our lives eventually takes the down road.
We are often afraid of what will happen if someone finds out about our weaknesses; we think we will be disgraced.
It seems too embarrassing to even think about them.
Thinking about it, talking about it, and then planning about how to improve is all we need, and the first step is to face the fear that acts like inertia for growth.
Suppose you have a fear that your job will be lost How to deal with this fear?
11
One of the strategies to deal with insecurities is What if
thinking…!
What if I lost the job?
What is the probability that my job will be lost?
Are there any shortcomings in my job that make me think I will lose my job?
Can I get a better job?
When you start asking yourself these questions, your fears will begin to go away because now you are thinking logically, not ‘emotionally.’ Only when you think ‘emotionally’ you start to panic.
We often fall prey to these insecurities because we feel that other people are thinking of us all the time. It is not at all because today's world has become so fast, and no one has enough time to think about us. People have many problems in their lives. People are worried about their problems, and even their problems are not solved. Have you ever wondered why the son of your father's friend did not study medicine? When you've never thought about them, why do you think they're always thinking about your career?
12
The fear is inside us, and we feel that people from
the outside world are thinking about us.
13
f you are afraid to speak in front of people, it’s because of shame. If you feel ashamed to express I your opinion, it’s your shame. If you are afraid to ask questions, it’s your shame. If you don’t do something new because of what people say, it’s your shame.
Even when someone else is praising us, we are
ashamed because there is shame somewhere inside us
Imagine that you're sitting on the sidewalk, eating your favorite food. Imagine that you are speaking with enthusiasm. Imagine that you are expressing to people how much you love them. All of these things are possible, but only if you work on your shame.
I also faced shame as a child, and I started thinking that I would spend my whole life with shame, but when I found out that the only solution to deal with shame is to face it and overcome it. It took some time, but I eventually did it, and now public speaking is part of my comfort zone. If I want to grow even further, I can overcome other 14
challenges that scare me or that require intensive smart work. The road to success starts with one step at a time.
We have to do everything we're ashamed to do so that we can make shame realize that we can’t always listen to you. Expose yourself to shame because unless you face the shame, you will never be able to overcome it. Shame is something that makes us hollow inside.
The biggest problem we all have today is that we are ashamed to do anything below our status. No work is small or big; we make it big or small ourselves. I have seen a lot of people who have a Ph.D. but are reluctant to work, which is a little lower than their status; they think this job is small, and people will make fun of us. We like to be unemployed, but we don't do anything to get a job.
I think the people who sell vegetables or fruits on the streets are the best Entrepreneurs we have today because there is no fear in them that people will make fun of them because they only focus on making money . I would urge
the government to ask all these vegetable and fruit
sellers to give lectures to the Ph.D. students at the
university on how to overcome their shame.
Do you see people sitting in the middle of the road for 15
nothing? Probably not. I did two things to beat my shame; one thing I did was to sit on the main road of Islamabad, and I asked my friend to take a picture of me while the second thing I did was to sit on the streets of Lahore and eat my favorite foods. Why were these scary or shameful?
Its because people would ‘judge me’ for my actions. I did both things to get out of the fear of judgment.
Countless people had great ideas but could not implement them and left this world because they did not dare to deal with and overcome their shame. Because they thought that if we shared our idea with people, people would make fun of us. People who are on the deathbed don't regret what they did in their life; they regret what they didn’t do.
Whenever you suffer from shame, just say it to your mind: " I am feeling ashamed because I've learned from
society to feel ashamed. And now it's my responsibility
to unlearn it."
16
ear is considered to be the most dangerous emotion, and the reason is that fear freezes a F person's life (or at least a part of it). It becomes a major obstacle between our goals.
Fear seems real to us, but whatever we fear is nothing but an irrational thought.
Fear is nothing but false evidence appearing real.
We are scared because of our experience and also because we saw someone else having the same bad experience.
We often feel inferior, and we don't believe in our abilities. We are afraid of many things because we have not tried them before. Fear is something that when a person gets scared, and others find out about this person's fear, then they start scaring that person more because now this person has become a game for all these people. If someone threatens you, do you get scared right away?
The world today is comparatively safer than older times, and even if something scares us, we must think logically.
17
There are too many preventive measures we can opt for.
Today is the age of social media, and everyone has a mobile phone in their hand. Today, we can all ask for help in times of trouble. Today, every minister has become very accessible. The crime rate has come down drastically because people are becoming more and more aware, and people realize that if I do something wrong, I will be caught. Today's era has grown so fast that news reaches from one place to another very fast. People who think that now people can be fooled are fools themselves. They are not updating themselves, and they are not acknowledging the fact that in this fast-paced world, none of their tricks will work. We have no idea how strong our mind is and that we can change our thinking on our own. We can have a swaggy mind if we start to make our thoughts swaggy.
Imagine that you are the Prime Minister of your
country, and you have all the power. Imagine that no
one can harm you because you have authority
