Proclamation: The Fourth Key to Happiness
The Fourth Key to Happiness: Create a Proclamation that revolutionizes the inner and outer world; designed to create health, beauty and prosperity for ourselves and others.
Now we understand the importance of the Deepest Desires entwined with our personal strengths and resources. It’s time to design a Proclamation. First, let words associated with goals and strengths spill out of the mind. Write them down! This is a word spill. I learned it in the fifth grade which was a long time ago in human experience but only a blink of the eye in the realm of Fairy. I’ve practiced with this tool. It has never let me down.
A word spill is letting our mind free. The words become a path or bridge connecting our dreams with the temporal world. This language will guide us through the Great Silence. Empowering, they may heal us of depression. The terminology of success and positive change is the arena of the Fairy Godmother. Cinderella has spent years struggling and grieving. When the Fairy Godmother appears it marks a shift in her readiness to move beyond her grief. The Way of the Fairy Godmother studies the singular point in time for positive change and personal transformation. Designing a Proclamation documents, makes literal, her hopes and dreams.
To prepare describe, using as many words as possible, what success and happiness looks like across your unique vision for life. Let the words flow. Don’t worry. Erase words you’re not happy with after the spill. I hope we all use the entire page. Our version of happiness and success may need more than one page. Here is an example of a word spill: When I’m not writing books, I moonlight as a Happiness Coach. My Deepest Desire as a Happiness Coach is to teach people the tools and skills of creating harmony and beauty while simultaneously manifesting wishes and goals. Key words are: manifesting, Deepest Desires, harmony, identification, beauty, practicality, tangible, transcendence, focus, congruence, creativity, dreams, wishes, goals, empowerment, truth, serenity, love, Golden Ladders, abundance, joy, laughter, prosperity, positive language, positivity, success……I could go on and on, but you get the idea. Writing a word spill choose vivid words. Be extravagant, be sparse, strong, delicate, oops, this is your word spill. Select words infused with the important qualities of your Deepest Desires. Some teachers might advise: If you’re Deepest Desires do not thrill and terrify you; go back and re-examine those desires.
All this comes with a caveat. Our Deepest Desires evolve. We may find ourselves on a different track. No problem. Take the example of the video gamer. He gets involved with court reporting. The law becomes a new passion. His Deepest Desire has evolved. He is immersed in the field of justice….. When I realized I wouldn’t fill the air with sparkles as a dancer I evolved into what had been my secondary interest; psychology. It might seem a world away to you. For me, both worlds are about transformation and the spectrum of experiences encapsulated by life and death. Before we become entangled in a war of words let me ask you two questions: Do you believe only life contains beauty? Do you believe only death causes grief and anguish? On each path I’ve encountered anguish and beauty. Writing The Way of the Fairy Godmother I am engaging beauty, not from the point of view of dance or yoga. I create beauty with words intertwined with the story of Cinderella’s apprenticeship to the Fairy Godmother. But if those words aren’t grounded in reality they have no grit, grip or traction. The bottom line? If we can’t find a way to make our dreams relevant in the material world they would be meaningless. (I’m leery of making such a dogmatic argument and I’m not sure ‘meaningless’ is true statement one- hundred percent of the time, but pretty close.)
When you engage your personal strengths with the design of your proclamation you have a map designed to revolutionize your future. A proclamation tethers your dreams into reality. To proclaim the intentions of our authentic-self translates our dreams into a potential reality. Every Proclamation is unique. They reflect our one-of-a-kind gifts and talents. The essence of who we are and who we want to become are reflected in our Proclamation. Yep, it feels vulnerable, starting with writing words associated with the success and process of actualizing our dreams, because they ignite power. From this pool of words we carve out our Proclamation. We might, we will, be overwhelmed with the audacity it takes to live our dreams. Plans brought to life with words in our Proclamation ignite the Divine Transmuting Flame. Combined with action, the friction of reality and dreaming, this spiritual flame burns away the dross that keeps us from becoming whole and complete, ready to live our dream.
I know it sounds scary. It is scary. From this cocoon of imagery we create our Proclamation. A Proclamation is the map to transform our life. The Fairy Godmother worked with the Prince to define his Proclamation. The key to the Prince’s successful Proclamation was to meld his intention with attention. Or, to say it another way, the Proclamation merges desires, wishes, hopes and dreams with intended actions. It’s the actions that will manifest our desires. The process of blending attention and intention gives rise to congruent behavior resulting in the creation of Positive Possibilities. Synthesizing attention with intention is at the core of designing enduring happiness. Hold on! Did I mention the part about Cosmic Comedy and the circuitous path to enduring happiness?
Here is an example from my own life. A true story, it is a little sad and a little funny. In the midst of the circumstances leading up to my divorce I intensified my search for ways to encourage and cultivate calm. I was dismayed to find myself triggered into despair or infuriated. If you haven’t been a peri-menopausal woman it’s difficult to understand the full depth of fury….so this example is a little outside the box of our maiden–Cinderella and Old Wise One – our Fairy Godmother, storyline, but here goes: Remember, it was a friend going through a divorce that brought me to my first yoga class. She left after a couple classes but I stayed on. It was the promise of peacefulness advertised with yoga that had me buying class package after class package, until I finally bought an annual pass. At yoga they played cool music. Classes took place in soft lighting. They were challenging and arduous which was exciting. The classes ended with suggestions, positive suggestions, for life. I wanted to feel peace instead of my escalating distress. I wanted yoga to develop my muscles of tranquility. I thought if I could just recapture my equanimity I could stay married.
My intention was to increase my composure. I gave my attention to the task by taking yoga. AKA twisting my body into shapes, where once we are sufficiently uncomfortable we consciously, volitionally, chose to be calm. Serenity in the midst of our body’s convoluted posture? The theory is if we can be calm in the midst of stressful poses, when we encounter stress in ordinary life we have already wired into our body and spirit, calm and serenity. I desperately needed both. For the yoga purist; yes the original purpose of yoga is to prepare the body for hours of seated meditation. But a modern day take on yoga is the tortured body, calm mind application.
As I said the product of blending intention with attention creates Positive Possibilities. Positive psychology hypothesizes that eventually Positive Possibilities snowball carrying us toward our aspirations. My quest for serenity with a yoga practice yielded predictable manifestations of Positive Possibilities. I lost weight. I became flexible. I felt more confident. I had a growing sense of mastery in my abilities. Yoga became a focal point in my life. It was transformation on an epic scale, relatively speaking.
Two things did not change. First, despite losing weight my back still hurt and my body ached. Secondly, worst of all, my hair-trigger despair and anger with my marriage might have become even worse. What was going on? Combining my attention with my intention was creating positive outcomes. I was excited by my new abilities. But I hadn’t become peaceful. This is the part where we see one of life’s little cosmic jokes. Yes, we can agree attention and intention creates Positive Possibilities. Some were happy surprises. I hadn’t expected to lose so much weight. I never thought I’d be able to do the splits again. But, let’s get back to those pesky possibilities. Has anyone told you on the path to Positive Possibilities we cannot predict all of the results of our attention and intentions synthesis? Sometimes nourishing intentions yields surprising, unexpected outcomes.
Symbolically, it’s like planting a flower garden. We cannot predict which seeds will germinate. Some say a Higher Power chooses the color of the blossoms. Watering and weeding fulfills our intention to create a garden. Continue to marry attention (water and weeding) and intention (a beautiful garden) and savor the astonishing artistry of the intention and attention garden. Sounds good. Or in yoga speak, “it’s all good.”
My real life example, desperately hoping yoga would allow me to interact with serenity in my marriage was not turning out as I’d expected. Instead of leading me into a state of equanimity my garden was growing unexpected flowers. I was confused. The more I did yoga the less tolerance I had for the subtext of lies and deceit, the financial infidelity that characterized my marriage. I practiced yoga to find calm and capacity that would allow me to stay in my eroding union. Instead I felt more outraged. I kept asking myself, “Where is the composure I’m building?”
Even my husband asked, “I thought you were doing yoga to calm down?”
I didn’t realize yoga encourages a state of truth within our body. Although, retrospectively, it seems self-evident. I was unprepared for the reality; yoga embodies truth. Asana (yoga postures) purifies muscles, bone, our CNS and organs. The image? Pour truth in, and if the container is dirty, then as the clear water of truth pours in, the dirt moves out. After the dirt was out I discovered I couldn’t tolerate the cheating. As a result of practicing yoga truth found a home in me. Painfully, these were not the calm truths I’d hoped for. The more I fed a yoga practice with my time and attention the more I was confronted with the intolerable and emotionally cataclysmic truths of my circumstances.
Although terrifying what germinated within me was the determination to disengage myself from the destructive illusions. These were the astonishing results born out my yoga practice. It wasn’t the color, shape, or variety I’d expected. In all honesty it took me years to recover equanimity. The shattering was not just my marriage but the life we created. Rebuilding a life from scratch with a son entering his teens, I really cannot recommend it. It was the process for me of collecting equanimity in its true form. Are you ready for a revolution in your life?
Here is another facet of Deepest Desires. Maybe you’ve noticed in fairy tales we seek out one journey, one goal at a time. It makes the story go more smoothly. One quest is easier to follow. In real life we might have a bundle of quests. My quests this month? I finish the course work for my PhD in Positive Psychology. I re-activate my counseling license by taking a bundle of continuing education classes over the internet. I’m polishing this book. I’m trying to starve myself to lose weight I gained post-back surgery. I have not been successful yet. (Is it better to have a diet that starves us in reality then indefinitely trying to starve ourselves?) More quests: I’m a Mom of a now 23 year old man. How does that work? I am a golden-doodle Mom dealing with his allergies that lead to licking his legs and feet raw; OCD style. I’m a wife. A new-found husband and no he isn’t interchangeable. I worry my husband feels he’s last on my list. My point is, in the spirit of full disclosure, I’m writing this book from the point of view of a fairytale. Real life has multiple quests simultaneously. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you it can get crazy. But let’s get back to the fairy tale version. As difficult as writing a book is, writing a fairy tale version of life is much simpler than living life. You’ve probably ascertained this from my snippet of a story. WHEW! NEXT!
For those of you still with me on the journey now is the time to transform magical imagery into Proclamations and the reality of a new future. This is where the magic of the Fairy Godmother stops and the grunt work of realizing dreams begin. The Fairy Godmother (imagery) is a catalyst for change, not the change itself. If we’re ready for the ephemeral nature of our dreams to fall away and the reality of our dreams to take shape then it’s time to write out a Proclamation.
When people come to see me, not to grieve or understand the pains of the past, but specifically ready to court positive change I am continually surprised how difficult it is to nudge them forward and engage in writing Proclamations. Sometimes I write while they dictate. Sometimes I ask questions and they write down their answers. At the end, one way or another, they need to leave my office clear on their commitment. The Proclamation is a resource, should they pick up these threads, to weave their future. Our proclamation puts us on notice. It is time to make dreams real. And this part is no fairy tale… Unless we can transform the dreams into tangible and substantial reality all of these Deepest Desires have gone unrealized. The Proclamation moves us from the gossamer wings of the dream world to the dirty, gritty, daily grind of hard work, in the blink of an eye. And that is why the Proclamation is essential.
It is a map. A practical method for using our hard earned positive vocabulary to assist us in the concrete substantiation of our dreams. Use the visionary language generated from the word spill to create the Proclamation. The Proclamation encompasses how the attainment of our goals conveys value to us and others. It’s a nuts and bolts description of our ambitions and their positive expressions. For example, I want to write a book about the technology the Fairy Godmother teaches apprentices. I believe the skills of the Fairy Godmother are found in positive psychology, embedded in the fairy tale itself, and a portion of the Fairy Godmother’s tools are a reflection of the crossroads that dwell in the heart of mysticism. Who is the foremost apprentice to the Fairy Godmother? Yes! Cinderella… So my research will be to understand the Fairy Godmother’s interactions with Cinderella; within the context of positive psychology, fairy tales and mysticism.
Can you see? The Proclamation is the point in our journey to be literal. For example, in my quest I’ll write one chapter about Deepest Desires based on the conversations at the heart of the fairy tale. Another chapter will describe personal strengths as our resources sourced from Positive Psychology. And a theme interwoven throughout the book will be describing the mystical crossroads where opposites meet and resolve into something wonderful. If you are like me and have the tendency to be a dreamer, then writing the Proclamation could be challenging. Even though it’s literal don’t confuse the Proclamation with the Golden Ladder. Climbing the Golden Ladder is the actual activity. Just as writing the chapter is different from thinking about a chapter. Actions come after the Proclamation has been accepted as accurate. Is the Proclamation a complete statement of our Deepest Desires and who we wish to become? The Golden Ladder is a listing of the behaviors required to achieve our goals.
Create a Proclamation and be specific. In writing a letter to a friend you wouldn’t send a jumble of letters tossed together as word salad. It’d be unreasonable to expect the receiver to decipher the message amidst the chaos and jumble. Clarity and specificity create strong mental images. The reason writing a Proclamation gets confusing is because our mind does not think in words. Our mind thinks in images. A Proclamation requires us to write literal words, which will translate in our mind, into images. These images create a cascade of biological events. The clarity of our mental images is a significant factor in signaling to our body, mind and spirit that we are serious about living our dreams.
We use the power of positive language to describe how the attainment of our goals benefits us and others. The Proclamation outlines our intentions and commitments to these intentions. Our Proclamation informs the self where we will put our attention; time, energy and focus. It dissipates the misty veils of uncertainty and confusion. If I dream of being a doctor, my Proclamation will contain my aspiration of becoming a doctor and the passion behind ‘why medicine?’ The Proclamation will outline the steps of education, possible specialties and the required residencies.
The final Proclamation is a coherent, integrated, affirmation of our commitment. Depth of understanding, commitment to goals, and dedication wired in with our signature strengths is reflected in the Proclamation. Growing competency, the evolution of our dreams over time, the Proclamation is the unwavering commitment to manifest our images into tangible form. With enough time, persistence and momentum Deepest Desires flower and grow, shaping our circumstances and destiny.
The Prince’s Proclamation was sent out across the land and inspired many. Single women dreamed of being chosen by their version of a Prince. Others were inspired to ignite their visions for a version of their best possible self. A Proclamation will stir up emotion, positive and negative. Once the Proclamation is complete our behavior becomes inextricably tied to Deepest Desires, native talents, dignity and purposeful action.
The next steps, climbing the rungs of the Golden Ladder, these actions illuminate our life, as well as the lives of those who are affected by our conduct! The garden of life will bloom and flourish in abundant and unexpected ways when we match our actions with our dreams. Could this be our personal version of the Garden of Eden? Could the Garden of Eden live inside us waiting to be explored and discovered? Our Proclamation is transformed from mere words into the boundaries of the garden of our realized self.
The Fourth Key to Happiness: Create a Proclamation that revolutionizes the inner and outer world; designed to create health, beauty and prosperity for ourselves and others.