Hugs & Bunnies: Weird and Dark Tales by Russell A. Mebane - HTML preview

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Chapter 4:  The Courtship of Flowers



The sparrow flies over the garden and passes over a patch of orchids.  Pretty flowers with a wide assortment of shapes and colors, they attract honeybees to the garden.  The Gardener walks the earth of her garden through black soil to watch the going-ons of the flowers and the bees.  

The orchid is unique among flowers.  Its petals do not simply encircle the pistil and stamen.  Instead, the petals are fused into upper and lower halves forming a splendid gate of floral colors.  The honeybees fly around the orchids as the flowers thrust their aromas into the air, saying, 

“Come to me. Come to me.”

A bee lands on an orchid.

“Come,” bids the flower.  “Drink my nectar.”

The honeybee obeys and steps through the gate of petals.

“Yes, drink me,” says the flower.

Then the gate clamps down on the honeybee.  It struggles and cries, “Let me go.”

“Drink my nectar,” the flower repeats.  “Give me your pollen.”

As the bee struggles, it drops the pollen gathered from other flowers.

“That’s right,” says the orchid.  “Wipe your pollen on me.  Drink my nectar.”  

The touch of the orchid is light, but its grip is firm.  “Help me have children,” begs the orchid, “Drink my nectar.”

“Let me go,” pleads the bee.

“Wipe your pollen on my pistil,” says the orchid.  “Touch my stamen.  Spread my pollen to others.  Drink my nectar.”

Tired of struggling, the bee drinks the nectar.

“Drink my nectar.  Give me sex.  Drink my nectar.  Give me sex.”

The bee finally wrestles free of the orchid, and flies back to its hive.  It flies past other orchids, who are offering nectar to bees in exchange for genital stimulation.  The bees come away from the orchids, covered in pollen.  They carry the nectar back to the hive and tell others where they found it.  The bees never mention that the orchid’s nectar is never free.  

Next to the patch of orchids is a stretch of wild dandelions.  Bees fly amongst these yellow flowers as well.  They land on their soft blossoms and commiserate on their blooms.

“Drink our nectar,” the dandelions say with their own sweet scent.  “Sit with us and talk.  Share your pollen and ideas.”

Tired from their troubles with the orchids and life in general, the bees obey.  They relax among the dandelions, sharing pollen and sipping nectar.  The flowers use the pollen to make seeds and the bees use the nectar to make honey.  There’s no pressure here, no firm floral grips.  Both species are allowed to advance their symbiosis at their own pace.