God Saw You Kill My Two Little Friends! by Never Again - HTML preview

Matt knew Micky would be the easiest one to have sex with for this night they were all easy. He already had sex with Micky was no longer interested in her as was many boys and men who had been with Micky. When Micky caught on they got into a fight not serious YET!

They all went swimming somewhere along the way Maggie, Micky and the other girl got into arguments and fights over Matt. Matt and Maggie went off together. They climbed in Micky's bedroom window. Hundreds of girls and men had been doing this for quite some time over the last three or four years. I listened for awhile when they started having sex I busted in.

Micky nor the other guys and girls didn't know what was going on yet they separated after the fights. Micky and the others busted in at the same time. Micky was pissed! I ran everyone out except Micky one of the homeless boys we were helping and the 9 year old. Maggie and Matt went to the woods stayed there having sex for days.

There was a shoot out in Bunker Hill in one of the homeless hang outs. Justin, the boy we were trying to help was hiding partying in an abandoned trailer listening to it on the news. I knocked on my computer room door to see if Justin was decent could I open the door. Justin is a 20 year old man actually not a boy.

I wanted to tell him how lucky they were to have gotten out of there safely they could blame and arrest them for something to do with the shoot outs. I could not believe what I was seeing shocked. The 9 year old girl was grinding on Justin. I was disgusted. I almost got sick got my thoughts together once again kicked them all out.

They started waiting till we were at work or into morning hours sneaking in even broke another one of her windows out so they could climb in with a provided ladder from my shed. I'm at a loss for thoughts words and actions. Courts schools the school board cops judges probation officers and officers counselors CEP and Cins and Fins keep coming after me! Why am I on trial?

Why do they go after the parents? Tony, the Cins and Fins counselor keeps saying, "He will protect me just go through the motions I'll be ok." Now where have I heard that before oh yeah public pretenders. I swear I think Tony is doing cocaine he's constantly twitching. I've heard the same words from Dr. Camille Gecobee.

I overheard Dr. Camille Gecobee give some advise to one mother later that mother was drug tested taken to jail she was arrested I was leery careful what I say to any of these people. I showed up for a couple more meetings with Tony while Micky was out partying. He said; "He put a warrant out on her." He lied. He scheduled another meeting.

While sitting in the waiting room I saw a family with a young boy come out of a big room they had been whipped down by these people intimidated leaving with their tails tucked heads bowed looked beaten! I looked in the big room I recognized a few faces sitting around this big table.

One lady was with the court one was on the school board another was a counselor another from CEP school a couple I didn't know and Tony. I went in didn't know what was going on nor what to expect to happen. I know I  was not going to take any shit off of them like the parents that just left.

I was not going to let a bunch of blame fingers pointed at me be accused of putting forth a bad influence as far as sex or drugs or anything. I was determined since I don't have Micky present never do to point my finger back at them stop them from making me leave that room feeling as bad as the previous parents Kiss My Ass.

Without Micky present given all the circumstances and evidence I thought they would put her in a long term program finally, but NOT! They were out to do just what I thought they were going to do to me. They were going to dissect expose intimidate accuse point fingers try to hang and break me.

I purposely wore a dirty 2005 Bike Week Harley Davidson T-shirt, a dirty pair of jeans, paint all over me and my boots untied. I knew they were going to drag me threw fire and coals so I gave them ammunition. I was trying to depict a hard working naive loving mother. They took it as oh a drugged up drunken biker bitch.

I realize they were all hard core vultures ready to pounce on parents. I'm sitting with everyone from the school boards counselors and court being judged picked on probed questioned accused blamed shamed fingers pointing blame for everything on me as I thought it would be. I have been through so much in life in the past and present I'm sure the future holds much worse.

I've been dealing with Micky her boyfriends and friends their parties bullying me all their bullshit all the courts cops fights with other girls parents Mike's courts child support fines community service jail bonds and Mike's alcoholic ass all morning.

Mike changed our plans they violated him for smelling like alcohol we started going everywhere except to this meeting for Micky I was supposed to be at. I was almost late didn't know what or who I was facing. They were prepared to throw darts at me I was in no mood to take any more shit off of anyone especially these fucking court and school people.

I've truly had enough of these people they can Kiss My Ass. They started with records of the times I've gotten around the courts maneuvering manipulating protecting Micky. They addressed the issue of how many times HRS has investigated me the extreme amount of truancy. They started telling me how unfit I was and I was not trying to get her to school.

I have presented bad images or examples for Micky etc...In Micky's life? How the hell was I was a bad influence on her? Kiss My Ass! An alcoholic drug addict deemed I needed all kinds of counseling, drug awareness classes, parenting classes and counseling.

At first I was being polite civil I realized they were lashing out at me no one had ever been formally introduced that wouldn't change anything they already decided to destroy my life. They asked me if I would co-operate in all this. At first I was numbed couldn't grasp it all and was expected not to interrupt or speak out.

OH do they have the right person for that I started telling THEM how it is interrupting them abruptly when they were wrong. Tony kept telling me to listen more shut up. Shut up?! No I won't shut up. I've had enough of you people coming at me punishing me putting me on trial. I have driven Micky to and from school since Kindergarten. I have driven her to all the bus stops.

I still get up at 6:00 A.M. every morning begging her to go to school when she is here which is rare. Joanne is the supervisor of transportation over school busses has a lot of close friends even in transportation at CEP.

She got three new bus stops because of all the incidents and fights and I'm going to another court over one incident.

One of the bus stops Micky was now assigned to is only two blocks from the house she still won't go I still keep trying I'm still being given death penalty. I told them I was not going to co-operate anymore I was not going to any of their counselors parenting classes drug counseling nor counseling. I will not try to get her off to school anymore.

I am not a bad parent I'm sick of you all accusing me of this. They tried saying, "I set bad examples throughout her life." I told them all don't go there because I quit drinking and doing drugs then got totally legal when she was only a thought. I never let her see her dad nor any man touch me. We never kissed nor held hand in front of her.

She slept in my bed till 12 then was pissed to leave my bed. She thought she was leaving my life. I found bundles of letters she has written in detail every man and their sexual encounters. Bunches of suicide letters. One she was gloating telling me na nanna boo boo I've slept with 14 men since 10 and you know I smoke cigarettes and pot, but you didn't know I started at 10.

She was telling me she was a cutter what teenagers are calling people who cuts their wrist. Telling me also how she stole pot and got other young people doing it. I'm waiting on medicaid, SSI and another summons to go back to court so they can legally demand I do these classes, programs, counselings, parenting classes and have them court ordered.

They told me there was no such thing as a long term program or in house program. They told me I'm stuck with her the courts and my situation till she's 16. I should tell the judge put me in jail. I don't care long as I can get a piece of mind closure for this. No solution to this situation. Fights go on and on him and I fight Micky and I fight Him and Micky still fight.  

I didn't mention much about my dogs throughout my life. I owned a kennel many years ago at my house in Kentucky. I was raising, breeding, training and registering pure blood Beagles and Pit-Bulls. Sarah's dad was called Satan her mother called Angel.

They won over 50 fights in the mountains of Appalachia, Kentucky and Tennessee owned by one of the men who trained, taught and backed me in cock fighting, Billy Graham. The law put those dogs to sleep, but they couldn't find their daughter, Sarah. She was with me. I traded my 32 and $500.00 for her as a pup and named her after Stevie Nick's song.

We ran for miles together everyday in the country going towards Lexington on Richmond Rd. She had only one litter of 18 smart pups. Sarah protected me from Tommy she hated Tommy. I built her a huge house next to the game cock pens kept clean hay in all the gamecock pens kept Sarah clean hay too.

I hid with Sarah in that big dog house from Tommy's anger and abuse. Sarah was named after Stevie Nicks song. Him and Sarah didn't have much to do with each other he would never look inside that big dog house I built there were plenty of dark corners to hide in. No one ever thought of looking in Sarah's house.

She surely wouldn't tell them anything she would tear them apart if anyone or him came near her house. Tommy thought Sarah was a vicious dog. No she wasn't it was that I was inside her house all the time. She knew how abusive Tommy was to me wouldn't let him near me. He ignored her she growled low at him I was safe there.

I didn't get nervous there was a chance he would look in there I knew Sarah hated him she would tear him apart fighting is in her blood big time. No one knew about my hiding place with Sarah. Not even my kids. After the house burned down I let a friend take care of her.

I saw him in passing in jail he was there for child support he said; "Sarah went crazy ran through an electric fence he found her later starved to death." Cindy was a champion runner trainer Beagle a good one she had a room full of trophies. She had four litters she trained all of them they all made it none had to be left behind. We tie the litter to the mother.

Many times I had to get her off the fence she hung herself the fence was stuck inside her eye a few times or by the collar. She was Faithful loved she me dearly. She was a loyal good hearted Beagle. She even took in babies from other litters nursing them, a Lemon Beagle we sold her as a pet she wasn't a hunter.

If any of them slow her down she chews them loose they are left behind. Rule of Mother Nature. Someone stole her pawned her off 4 or 5 pawning offs later she became our's. Perfect dogs for a perfectionist she was always escaping to hunt. She hung herself most times when trying to escape. When the house burned down she was old I loved her so much I gave her freedom.

I let her loose in the woods in the back of our house so she could live the rest of her days hunting just as she always wanted. I had one male Beagle was awesome. I had a doctor's appointment in Winchester for my kids nothing was open when I got there. An awesome male Beagle running around with his chain dragging.

His tag was present, but not readable I couldn't trace the owner down. The rabbi's tag was there no address nor name. Knee deep in snow Me and the kids knocked on every door for miles trying to find it's owner. We gave up towards the end of the night took him home with us. He was a handsome dog I named him butch he looked like a butch.

Turns out he was as good of a hunter as Cindy. He kept up with her. I bred with him for a year or so. The owner got hold of the story somehow someone with long blonde hair and two kids stole his dog. He was a wealthy doctor he put an add in the papers with a $10,000.00 reward for me.

My mother-in-law knew where I got the dog from a year or so before was going to turn me in. I cut all my hair off and let the dog loose near where I got him from. I called the doctor and apologized. I told him the story of how we knocked on doors in the area for miles and he was healthy loved and well taken care of.

I told him he was within one block of him the doctor said; "No harm done he made his way home." He was there safe and the charges were dropped. A German Shepard we were both pregnant stuck up in the mountains alone with no water no food no electric daylight for our only light. Her and I searched for moss to squeeze drops of water out of it to drink.

She dug it out and got an entire cup of water. We shared what we find. She could hunt and get rabbits, but there was no way of cooking them for me, but she could eat. Tommy put me in the mountain until his dad insisted he brought me back to town to give birth to his first grandson. She would not give birth till I went with her. She would never leave my side. I went back to town I could no longer keep her. She grieved over me and died.

Jackie the Jack Russell I bought out of pity for Billy dying and not having pussy in forever. I didn't care and wasn't going to help in this area. After he died I couldn't keep paying the vet bills on two dogs. Jackie was too hyper. She barked and jumped all the time getting me into trouble with Betty. After Billy died my meter maid's mother had a Jack Russell kennel I gave her to her paperwork and all for free though I paid $1,200.00 for her.

Bear. I loved that dog. She was a giant black fur ball. After many dogs I said; "No more." Micky and me went to the dog shelter in Sanford. There were three black balls of fur. They had shots and ready for adoption with pure black tongues. One started barking insisting I take her home. She was a pure black chow and grew to be huge. She stayed on the foot of my bed and protected me even killed rats getting into the house from the back woods.

She had an electric collar and fence around the yard she would not let no one get near me or Micky. Big-Macs are hard to refuse she was stolen by that ass hole room-mate lured off with a Big-Mac I never seen her again. Then there was Shadow, a Lemon Chow poisoned by a neighbor. I never got any pictures of her.

Ghost was Micky's dog. She loved this dog, but she was not responsible enough to take care of a dog. She left him locked in her room all the time while she went to party. I could not afford the vet bills for any more dogs. After this litter was born I was paying vet bills on three dogs. I was also going to court all the time getting evicted all the time over the dogs and pups.

I wrote the entire story from kindergarten to now. I titled it; "Mom age 50 going to jail for truancy" subtitled; "Do I give my daughter away or go to jail?" At what point if ever can any mother say DCF has gone too far? I put it in my documents in a PDF file emailed it to all the channels especially channel 9.

A man named Joshua, a reporter wrote me back asking when the next court date was when do I report to jail etc...I've been emailing him back updating him on everything including an open case new one I opened myself. I called DCF/HRS told them we were abusing each other can they send someone out to do an investigation.

I called then back I told them forget that last call my daughter is abusing me can you send someone out. DCF investigator called Tony from Cins and Fins told him if they take Micky they no longer have a case against this woman/me. My letter was copied forwarded to Sins and Fins Tony called he wanted to do a home visit I said; "Ok."

When he got here he showed me a letter asked what it was all about if is it mine. I thought I was in trouble at first someone wrote a letter signed my name. I recognized it as my story. He thought I would lie out of it wanted to see my reaction. I said; "Yes it's mine I wrote it Kiss My Ass."

I've been writing my life's story for a long time right now I'm writing all alone middle of the night listening to an alcoholic snore every night after he passes out. He tells me I snore when I sleep I never insult him by telling him he does. And what I sleep?

He does stupid shit then amazing shit then stupid shit then he comes back with more stupid shit then he comes back with something awesome to make me forget his last stupid mistakes. I told Tony I sent my story to a lot of stations offices etc...I told him about Josh, the reporter in the same breath I was watching his face for his reaction.

I thought he was going to say, "Your a nut we'll put you away forever" he didn't. He surprised me told me he was impressed with my story and my writing he wanted to make a special home visit to tell me they petitioned the court or judge he didn't tell me what they petitioned for.

I went to the SSI doc again two weeks later I was denied again at the ending of the letter their reason was no record of me being disabled during Dec. 2005 OMG Kiss My Ass. I have recent hospital statements from the hospitals just came in. I'm going to continue applying till I die.

I paid four hundred dollars over a four month time period for DSL and a phone they are just now finding the problem it was their fault once again and have not repaired it three repair men have been here I had to pay for the four months they were repairing it. It doesn't matter Mike shut my phone and Internet down after the last fight over fucking Calico Cat.

I can't get on the Internet to connect with Joshua or do anything on the Internet such as make money or publish my book. We've lost a lot of jobs due to not being on the Internet and the trouble we had in this area getting a connection.

Micky wants rides there and back in the middle of nights. She is bumming cigarettes, pot and food from me and everyone she comes in contact with. Not for her only don't get that wrong I know it's my responsibility to feed her, she's my baby till I die, but she cleans me out every time I get groceries she takes it to their homeless camps or abandoned trailers.

She stole my purse with whatever money she finds in it, steals the radios so the crack heads she hangs with can sell them. My digital camcorder evidently went out the door for crack cocaine along with a lot of other stuff and money a lot of this is Mike, Mark and Ratanal's son Stupuss stealing shit and selling it. Mike got our big mower running, but no computer.

Mike made me buy $60.00 worth of tea to clean out the pot from his system. I had to buy this twice so far so he can go into probation with clean urine. Two times at $60.00 bucks a pop that's $120.00 just on teas. We fight so much he does stupid stuff costing us thousands on his stupid mistakes and his fines, court cost, bonds, child support and probation fees.

People are always ripping us off and him and them are always robbing me. I learned down the road he was fucking had an obsession with crack head whores. All the gas and time to and from all the courts, probations, juvenile centers and shelters and all the money he spends in the bars when he has to be the one waiting was all on me.

When he's in court I stick by him I don't go wasting spending my money in bars. He just got ripped off for another $220.00 once again by some young punk crack heads. I told him once again please don't give that punk cash. I said; "I can't believe you just handed him that much cash up front again." I sat waiting with him knowing we were ripped off again.

Mike doesn't like listening to women or anyone else. I've lost count how many times now I've been ripped off and how much money, a lot of my cash. I warn him every time and tell him please don't do that again. Every time he tells me he knows them personally they wouldn't do that to him.

Bullshit either he's lying his ass off and splitting all the money or he really is just plain stupid. It's always the ones you think you know best that rips you off almost everyone is on crack cocaine out here. He's not the only one who gets tricked taken robbed by these crack heads they are good at it can rip off anyone don't say, "It won't happen to you" it will as you speak.

Seemed it was more him doing it being stupid it's happened many times later I was robbed big time. We have had them in Ole' Blue before after the rip offs we have cornered confronted many of the ones who ripped me off he never beats them up! He never does anything to them for ripping me off it's like he's in on it. He never gets upset or worried about the money.

I know if I get the truth exposed he will deny everything to the end that's how liars are eyeball to eyeball. Here I sit all alone crying Lucifer is trying me hard. I'm tolerating Micky's bullshit, her friend's bullshit and room-mates that keep claiming squatter's rights, Mike's bullshit, his ex-girlie friend's bullshit and his friend's bullshit. 

Room-mates keep coming in and out with all their bullshit I'm going broke over and over. What am I being punished in life for? I'm 40 when if at all does anything get easier or better? Neither of them know or understand nor care what I'm in the middle of what I'm going through with both of them and everyone around us.

It's my kid, my life, it's my money, it's my house and work, it's my boyfriend I thought at the time so why am I being punished? My only consolation in each situation is they all sold their souls for crack, coke, money and thieving. Mike gets drunk trashed becomes a belligerent obnoxious loud mouth lush no one can talk over him.

Everyone around us gets drunk loud tries to out talk each other pass out wherever and piss wherever. It's a headache everyday listening to these people get drunk scream over each other out talk over the same subjects. Drunks think no one can hear them they have to keep getting louder talk over top of everyone repeat total nonsense make complete asses of themselves.

No one can talk louder or faster about more nonsense bullshit than Mike. He talks down to me bosses me around takes all my money claims all of it. He takes all the pot I buy claims it too. He claims he's Mr. King Pin of everyone drugs this town etc..whatever. I'm not depicting I'm a survivor of 9/11 or a Senome or Katrina, but I'm a survivor of an awful lot of shit.

How did I get stuck in this tiny nightmare of a town where the crack heads rule our world steal everything from everyone around us in exchange for this continuously growing heartbreaking death drug called crack. This place is infested with crack heads meth heads and heroine addicts. Maybe that's why this one horse town is nicknamed "The Nightmare Before Christmas."

Christmas is the next town over it's infested also with crack heads meth heads and heroine heads. A friend of our's started getting quarter pounds for us to sell to help cover expenses it was my money yet he claimed the connections money and pot. He was bragging all over town that he had two businesses. Mike's Maintenance and selling pot both of which I was financing.

We were doing side jobs, but they only covered gas to the jobs whatever the job required materials beer cigarettes and food he cries complains in the mornings he wants breakfast lunch and dinner if he don't get it he takes it out on me becomes a total ass hole mean as shit if he don't eat on time. I cringe every time we are running low on beer pot or he's hungry.

Side jobs doesn't cover the bills. Pot is usually 10 blunts or so per day and three twelve packs per day. Blunts almost equal three joints which is right around $15.00, $20.00 street value. The rest of our survival such as bills come out of my SSI check which he gets pissed off and throws at me then snatches it after it's cashed.

The quarter pound at $230.00-$250.00 every few days 10 blunts at $15.00 a pop per day. Micky's and my bills electric phone Ole' Blue's insurance lot rent groceries Micky's cigarettes dog food wormers which are right around $70.00 or so. Their tags and Rabbi shots mange medicine which is $70.00 all of which no one has considered any of this part of their bills.

We've picked up more non paying alcoholic crack head room-mates once in awhile they pitch in on groceries not often not much. They get drunk every day till up in the night. They cook, but mostly burn everything pass out naked everywhere piss all over everything fight all day and night.

Their female Pit-Bull, Afton I took her on she was getting picked on bullied by another dog staying with them they couldn't take care of her anymore. I didn't know they were a package deal with their dog. Now they are living with or off us their dog is with them except I take care of her and feed her too.

My big headed D.T. fell in love with Afton they bred now I have 9 Pit-Bull/Kerr pups. I call them Kerrpits. They are both smart dogs except Afton insist on shitting everywhere in the house she won't quit. Now I have the burden of feeding another mouth then 9 more mouths and Holy shit I didn't count Mike's expenses.

Which is a lot of court cost, fines, child support, counseling, purges and bonds, teas to cover up pot for piss test for probation every month, safety courses and classes, bond money is a quite often one, commissary. The bonds on him get quite high plus we've been robbed three times around $2,000.00, Harley payments, paying back his mom money when he borrows from her.

Mike drains me of everything he's buying his brother crack cocaine he fronts loans people money and pot tons of them won't pay. The three times I got ripped off the boys that did it went to our friend Mr. Bling Bling's house and purchased crack cocaine. We'll call this dealer Bling Bling he's always running around with tons of bling bling around his neck.

He earns it from trading drugs he's too stupid to know the difference between real silver real gold and fake. Bling Bling's wife and I became good friends I know he sells her pussy to get crack cocaine he makes her go with black men and white men. They have two beautiful adorable girls together now a new baby boy. Bling Bling goes to a lot of bars picks up crack head tramps.

By that I mean young girls who have sex with any race for crack cocaine do married men and break up homes. Bling Bling started selling crack getting fucked up on a lot of drugs crack, cocaine powder and zany bars. Name a drug he sells it. He got into a lot of horse trading dealing in stolen merchandise. He was into everything.

Another reason I call them tramps is Bling Bling's wife and I are close I don't like any of these drugged out drunk dumb bimbos coming in between them. She's no game to play with either I love her and her children dearly. She hates he got into all this bringing the law, crack heads, thieving, trouble around her children and his dad.

Vicki hates that 75% of this town are crack heads running around stealing all the time. She hates everything the drug world brings. They stole a lot of money from me took it to him to buy crack or some other drug. I've helped finance his deals a few times.

It was getting eerie going around his house the law was aware he's a drug house another dealer friend of our's Grimy and my house are all drug houses they did walk throughs. I was told by a first hand eye witness source that Bling Bling is a snitch playing both sides.

There are so many snitches around us we can't pin point who is doing the snitching they didn't find anything for now. Mike and I had a lot of dirt on Bling Bling neither of us are snitches. We all made a pack to never let each other sit in jail which has cost me my house Ole' Blue and tons of cash over and over for all of us.

I have kept that pack, but Bling Bling and Mr. King Pin is getting carried away with this. They should be called Mr. Big Dick Heads. Mike gets drunk everyday sometimes he can stay a sweetheart sometimes he's really mean. Oh yeah I'm still on Mike's expense list remember? Bithlo is crawling with crack heads and thieves some of them are getting beat up bad lately.

There have been many raids home invasions beatings and killings. Mike and JF beat the crap out of crack head Kris tied him to a tree in a huge ant bed. We have caught Kris many times robbing everyone us his own dad our neighbors and Ratanal.

Kris bit part of Mike's ear off we all heard clearly when he spit part of Mike's ear out of his mouth Mike was bleeding everywhere. They beat on him for awhile then they let me beat on him with a baseball bat for awhile. Crack head Kris they call him has bullied me into giving him money for crack and many times he cheated us out of money and pot.

He has stole from everyone we know then beats on his dad all the time who is a handicapped old man and has robbed him blind all their lives. What I found weird about the whole thing was Mike was taking him to Ratanal he stole a phone from her Mike was upset about it. Why was he beating on crack head Kris because of Ratanal?

He never got pissed at anyone which were thousands for ripping me off. Anything to do with Ratanal he's right there protecting her dead diseased ass. Crack head Kris left town for awhile to let things cool off I wasn't making life easy on him. The bike I now have has been stolen over and over by all the crack heads out here.

One of the crack heads ripped me off left crack head Kris' bike at my house. Kris told one of our room-mates to get off the bike it was his. He made it back to the house with the bike I got on the bike rode to his house. I stopped in front of his house and I yelled; Hey Kris you say, "This bike is yours?"

He was yelling saying, "I remember what you did to me I got something for you and Mike." I said; "If you want this bike come and get it!" He started chasing me I started riding towards a ton of guys waiting around the corner to ambush him beat the shit out of him. No one i