3. Everything Isn't About You
Being self-centered is one of the biggest issues that humans struggle with. We think everything is about us. Don't believe me? Go read any Facebook post from your female friend that says, "Guys are such jerks" and see how many guys reply, "NOT ALL GUYS!". How many times have you been out somewhere and heard some people laughing not-too-far away, and you think it's about you?
My favorite is when we're driving and hear a car honk, and we throw our hands in the air in a the gesture of, "WHAT?! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!". Think about that for a second. You can be on the road with dozens, if not hundreds of other cars, and someone honks their horn, and you immediately think that it's about you. You just got angry because you think the world is all about you and any honk on the road must be directed at you.
Sorry for the tough love, but it's true. We need to also remember this in order to practice some empathy.
Have you ever had a bad day and took it out on the wrong person? Maybe you're stressed out about money, your relationship, your lack of a relationship, your job, your friends or something else that irritates us on a daily basis.
This has been something that I must remember on a daily basis in order to work in the addiction treatment and mental health field. I know you think I'm an extremely lovable guy, but believe it or not, I've had people in treatment tell me to go fuck myself and threaten to fight me. That's okay though, and here's why. Most of the time their anger isn't about me, which is why we must practice empathy.
Working in a drug an alcohol treatment center, these men and women are away from their friends and families. They've destroyed their lives financially. They don't know how to function without drugs or alcohol. They're dealing with symptoms of withdrawal and on a daily basis, they have therapists telling them things about themselves that they don't want to hear. So, when people snap on me, I practice empathy and compassion because I know they're in pain.
This is also how I keep my sanity as a YouTuber. When people come to my comment section acting a fool, I try to remember that they might be hurting. This doesn't mean that it's justifiable, but I have to remember that not everything is about me.
I remember one Valentine's Day, an ex-girlfriend and I went out to eat at a nice restaurant and our waitress was kind of rude to us. This made me furious. I'm paying for this expensive meal at this nice place to impress my girl, and this waitress is gong to give me attitude?! I told my girlfriend that I was going to complain to the manager, but my girlfriend at the time said, "Chris, it's Valentine's Day and this poor woman has to serve all these couples rather than being out with someone herself. Don't you think she has a right to be a little upset about that?"
And that made perfect sense because I quickly remembered that not everything is about me.
SURPRISE POP QUIZ: Based on the Valentine's Day story, what fears do you think I was dealing with in that situation?
