CHAPTER 18
08/27/2016
When the rest of the Fuglies learned that Bob Miller was legit they made sure to attend the fully paid for second business meeting on Bob's yacht the Pterodactyl. Although Bob was offering each and every one of them a handsome salary many of them had already made up their minds that they were gonna take advantage of him and not work any harder than they did at their current jobs. It had been ascertained by many that Bob usually felt extremely uncomfortable when people got within an earshot of him and began laboring vigorously. Bob always wanted people to be comfortable and if you wanted to get under his skin all you had to do was just start up a vacuum or frantically wipe a dirty window. If truth be told to get on Bob's good side you had to maintain a very slow methodical like energy. Talk slowly and articulate around Bob and he could pan out to be your best friend. Needless to say Bob's blood pressure often skyrocketed when jumpy children came around.
Although he was quite muscular and fit, his personality was much like a turtle. His actions in life however were much like a black swan people were saying about him. Dirty Bird...AKA the "Black Swan"
The playboy bunnies passed out champagne to all of the 298 Fuglies that had showed up to Bob's business meeting. Many still had many unanswered questions and many had just showed up to watch once again Robin Hood's extravagant performance in those green tights. The icy cold air conditioning wafted above the crowd putting everyone in a good mood.
They were all excited to hear what Bob Miller had to say. The big projector screen rolled down hushing the audience. It said the same thing as before.
Fugly Definition-
Fine
Underlings
Giving
Love
Year round
The crowd cheered when Screw Tooth Bill came out from behind stage sliding humongous cardboard boxes full of red jerseys out onto the stage. Bob didn't hesitate to reach into the box and pluck out a jersey. He motioned for the crowd to settle down so they could hear him talk.
"Friends friends! My fugly friends! Can I ask you all something? How many of you like wearing company uniforms on the job?"
The crowd erupted as over half of the Fuglies cupped their mouths so their voices could be heard. "Boooo!!Boooo!!!"
They all booed.
Bob grinned nonchalantly as if he was expecting the reply. He unfurled the red basketball jersey and showed the front of it to the crowd. It was a red very comfortable material jersey crimson of the finest. The front of it read in big white letters.
RISING
FUGLIES
With a cartoon picture of a Pterodactyl in the middle.
"Well guys what do you think? At least it's comfortable right? Not that itchy polyester crap like your employers make ya wear....and oh...I would never make you guys wear pants on a hot summer day....I think you guys will like these jerseys...they are free....they do not get deducted from your weekly paychecks."
The gaily crowd cheered and even stubborn ole Dusty put his drink down for a minute to clap. How cool was that? A neat looking basketball jersey for a work uniform? And best of all? Bob said pants weren't part of the work uniforms.
Every time the crowd got overly excited Bob's side kick Robin Hood couldn't help but launch nerf arrows into the crowd. Today he was launching nerf arrows with ten dollar bills taped onto the front. Bob Miller was buying the crowd's love and already had the crowd chanting...R-O-B-I-N H-O-O-D! Robin Hood!" They chanted.
Dirty Bird started flapping his arms as if they were wings to get the crowd more excited...Dirty Bird and Robin Hood....it kind of had a nice ring to it. Bob finally stopped flapping his arm like a chicken and brought the microphone a little closer to his mouth.
"So when you all go to work tomorrow to face your cruddy employers are you gonna buck up and give your two weeks notice so you can come work for me on Miller Island?"
Simultaneously the crowd rose from their seats and waved a victorious fist in the air in triumph. "Yeaaaahhhhh!!!!! Rising Fuglies we will rise up!"
Bob had never had this much support from such a large crowd.
It was getting as loud as a rock concert and he would have never dreamed of being able to incite a crowd like this so he kept the momentum going.
"Ladies and germs.....wave your glasses high...today the Fuglies will rise folks....today we will rise to fight ignorance!"
The crowd cheered as suddenly the theatre screen started flashing all sorts of goodie incentives for working on Miller Island. The words flashed quickly like a laser show. "15.00 hrly"...."Full Time pay"..."Sick Days pay"...."All paid holidays"... "Mandatory Christmas Bonus"....and yes....all the same goodies that the country once had in the nineties. Bob Miller was the very first American employer not afraid to Man Up and make an attempt of bringing back the good old school days of the nineties when words like "Resume" were only known to Wall Street workers and the word "Economy" could only be read on the cheapest selection of gas.
Bob Miller didn't yet realize it....but he was about to make the Forbes magazine once again.