Chapter 19
Scarface's Hummer whipped into the parking lot of the “Manchurian World Corporation” four-story office building in downtown Washington DC.
Scarface screeched the Hummer to a stop into an empty parking spot. He jumped out of the Hummer and ran to a side door of the office building.
He stopped at the door and opened up his cell phone and read the text message from Senator Cheatham. He punched in the cipher code provided by the Senator.
Meanwhile, Carter finally found his way back to the General Lee and went into his room at the Congressional Quickie Motel.
He lay on the bed while he reached down and removed his fourth bottle of A&W Root beer from a case on the floor.
He looked at the useless Pink Panthers while he opened up the bottle.
He grabbed the remote off the bedside table and turned on the TV. He gulped down some Root Beer while the TV powered up. He burped while he flipped through the channels.
He stopped on the Corruption Channel where sexy thirty year old female news anchor Leslie Lolita was enlightening the audience with updates on corruption. The Corruption Channel had a couple of green dollar signs located at the right corner of the screen.
“Mister Al Money the President of Global Worldwide Do Nothing Company was just given a fifty million dollar bonus for laying off two thousand employees. The company sighted the reason for the huge layoffs were due to dwindling sales causing the company to show smaller profits during the past year. Mister Money stated that the layoffs were necessary so he and his buddies could maintain their huge salaries and rich lifestyles,” Leslie Lolita the news anchor spoke into the camera.
“Greedy bastards!” Carter yelled at the TV.
A piece of paper was handed to Leslie. She glanced at the paper then glanced back at the camera. “We have breaking news for pathetic ex-detective Carter Remake from Remakewood, California. The same Carter that stole government secrets in Washington, DC earlier today,” Leslie Lolita said while she stared at the camera.
Carter jumped up off the bed and stared at the TV.
“Dear Carter, we have your ugly sheep dog,” Leslie said then she turned around and pointed at a picture of Sabrina the dog in her cage that appeared on the screen behind her.
“What an ugly dog,” Leslie Lolita muttered to herself and didn’t realize it was broadcasted.
She turned around and looked back at the camera. “And if you don't give us the stolen Pink Panther, we'll sell your ugly pooch to a Chinese restaurant for their next blue plate special. Please meet evil professional Scarface at the back of the White House in one hour. He’ll be parked in a black Hummer,” Leslie Lolita read off the paper.
Leslie Lolita picked up another piece of paper and glanced at it. “On the lighter side, the "How to Screw the Public by Selling Them Overinflated Stocks" seminar was a tremendous success as over six thousand corporate executive officers attending. Since that was a success, they will be offering the “Thirty-nine Steps to Ripping Off The Taxpayers” seminar to Congressmen in a secluded resort in Hawaii. This Hawaiian seminar will be paid by the taxpayers,” Leslie Lolita added.
She placed the paper down on her desk while sexy twenty-eight year old female Linda Lolita walked over and sat down next to Leslie.
“And now it’s time for Linda Lolita to provide our greedy listeners with the American Suckers update on the Corruption Channel. Tonight’s episode is the famous lies that the American voters fell for during the last election,” Leslie Lolita said while she smiled at Linda.
Carter paced the room gulping down Root Beer while he thought about the TV broadcast.
He turned off the TV with the remote.
He rushed over and grabbed the two Pink Panthers off the bed and shoved them into the pockets of his field jacket. He looked grossed out while he rolled up those nasty pictures of Admiral Palmer and shoved the back into the Pink Panthers. He shoved the Pink Panthers into his field jacket pockets.
Carter ran to the door and rushed out of his room.
A couple of seconds later, the room door slammed opened and Carter bolted back into the room.
“I gotta pee,” he cried out in a Forrest Gump voice while he hopped cross-legged over to the bathroom.
He peed for a few minutes.
An hour later, Scarface puffed on a Cuban cigar while he waited in his Hummer along the street behind the White House.
Carter drove the General Lee down the street and parked in front of Scarface’s Hummer. Carter jumped out of the General Lee.
Scarface got out of the Hummer.
It looked like a showdown while they walked over to each other.
“You got what I need?” Scarface asked when he stopped five feet from Carter.
“I saw a hooker walking out of the front gate of the White House a few minutes ago. You want me to go get her?” Carter replied with a smart-ass smirk.
Scarface thought for a few seconds over Carter’s offer and smiled at that thought. “Nah, not now. Maybe later. But I really need those Pink Panthers.”
Carter noticed Scarface's bald top. He bit his tongue to stop from laughing out loud remembering the earlier crash. “Did your electric razor go whacky on you too many times?” he said while he fought from busting out laughing.
Scarface got mad while he ran his hand over his bloody bald scalp. “Are we going to do this or what?” he said and wiped his hand on his pants.
Carter reached inside his pockets of his field jackets and removed the two Pink Panthers. “Where’s my dog?” he said while he held up the ceramic Panthers.
Scarface walked over to the rear of the Hummer and opened up the back door. “Here,” he pointed inside the SUV.
Carter walked over to the rear of the Hummer and peeked inside. He saw Sabrina the dog inside the cage looking so sad. He handed Scarface the two ceramic Pink Panthers.
Sabrina the dog strained inside the cage.
Scarface reached inside the Hummer and opened up the cage door.
Sabrina the dog jumped out of the Hummer into Carter’s waiting arms. He dropped to his knees.
“I'm sorry Sabrina. I really missed you,” Sabrina the dog then licked Carter’s face.
Scarface stuck his finger in his mouth indicating that sight was making him sick.
Scarface rushed over to the Hummer and got inside. He started it up and drove away.
Sabrina the dog was still licking Carter’s face. “I'm sorry Carter. Those Dalmatians didn't mean anything to me. It's you I love and you'll be my only man. I promise,” Sabrina the dog told Carter.
The Hummer screeched to a halt fifty feet away.
Carter and Sabrina the dog looked and saw Scarface jump out of the Hummer. He bent over and started having the dry heaves.
“What did you do?” Carter suspiciously asked Sabrina the dog.
“Well, I left him a smelly present. The result of the cheap dog food he fed me,” she replied with a chuckle.
“That's my girl!” Carter said while he knelt down and gave her a kiss on the lips.
An old man and an old lady walked nearby.
The old lady saw Carter kissing Sabrina the dog. “Freak!” she called out to Carter.
The old man looked the second a rainbow colored flash consumed Sabrina the dog’s entire body.
Then Carter kissing Sabrina the woman appeared.
The old lady fainted and dropped to the sidewalk.
The old man clutched his heart, stumbled around like Fred Sanford having a heart attack. He dripped to his knees and fell on top of the old lady.
Carter and Sabrina walked over and got inside the General Lee. Carter started up the car and screeched away.
Inside the General Lee, Sabrina the woman looked upset. “Now that Scarface has the evidence on government corruption, our mission was a bust,” she said while she looked out her door window.
Carter looked over at her. “He doesn't have it.”
Sabrina the woman glanced over at Carter a little confused with his statement. “But you gave him the Pink Panther.”
“I did, but the evidence wasn't in any of them.”
“Then what did Admiral Palmer do with it?” she curiously asked.
“I don't know. I just don't know,” Carter said while he scratched his head.
The General Lee drove down the road where the Pentagon was visible way off in the background.
Later that day, Carter drove Sabrina the woman back to the Congressional Quickie Motel where they sat around and pondered their next move on finding the evidence.