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There are other means to inquire into the realities of unsafe sex. We counted the number of condoms in trashcans in the most popular massage parlors (Tuesday, October 13, 2004; from open to closing hours) The results are listed bellow:
Massage Parlor
Number of clients
Number of condoms
MP 2
25
11
MP 3
40
27
MP 4
20
9
We cannot tell how many times each client had sex with one or more sex workers. We also cannot know the sexual practices clients engaged in. It is a fact that many of them do not consider oral sex without a condom as unsafe sex. Perhaps many of them do not practice vaginal or anal penetration, the riskiest practices for HIV infection. Nevertheless, it is evident that condoms are not used in around 50% of the time.
For sex workers the main reason for not using condoms is money. In the massage parlors, sex workers have different prices for ―bareback‖ sex. Lila, who works at MP4, charges $50 with a condom and $100 without it. Dildoman recognizes that some mongers pay up to $200 per session. He thinks this is too much money and also too unwise.
He said, "yeah but I can do anything I want with these girls".
I replied, "you mean anal sex?"
He said. "no dude, I can screw them without a condom!"
Not a very smart guy. 168
From 1997 to 2000 some NGO‘s and a program from Social Marketing of Condoms (PASMO) carried out workshops on prevention and on the correct use of condom to sex workers from the low-income sector in Costa Rica. Despite these interventions, the results were poor. It was found, for example, in the 2000 Survey (Table 19) very low grades in our battery of steps to observe correct condom use:
Twenty-seven per cent of the respondents opened their condoms with their teeth. Only 3%
checked for the expiration date. Only twenty-four per cent checked for air bubbles.
If we take into account those who correctly opened the condom with their fingers in one corner, those who squeezed the tip of the condom to expel air, and those who correctly unrolled the condom to cover the dildo, we have that only 18% passed the test.
If we add into consideration those who held the ring of the condom when pulling the condom out of the dildo, the index drops to 11%.
The index drops even lower when we take into account the 9 variables selected to analyze proper condom use. Only 0.5% of the sample succeeded.
The situation must be very serious with sex workers who exclusively work with tourists since they are not registered by the Ministry of Health and do not receive any health education.
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You would expect the American tourist to be knowledgeable of condoms and at ease with them. We do not know their ability to use them properly, but we do find lots of anxiety about buying them. Older men buying condoms is something that is not so well accepted in the States and mongers feel ridiculed for it. This suggests that there might be possible difficulties when talking about them and using them with sex workers. Bombero, for example, buys condoms in the Internet since he does not like to be seen shopping for them at regular stores: ―Thank goodness for the internet because I really hate buying those things in stores.‖169 Twarag sympathizes with Bombero since he also gets questioned from clerks at Eckerd why a man his age is buying condoms: ―Last month she laughingly said that your prescription order reflects a man of a certain age but the rest of my order gives a different story. Told her I am active and she laughed and agreed.‖ 170 Carib_ Wanderer reports to get weird looks from the cashier at Target.
Last trip I bought my 36-pack of rubbers at Target, along with 20 small bottles of body wash and lotions, bottle
of K-Y, 15 of those hair clips that the chicas keep clipped on their purses, 12 shower caps (chicas love those),
and lots of hershey's kisses (they love those too). The cashier was looking at me like I was from Mars; she
probably was thinking "what the hell???" 171
Phat Prophet also reports nasty looks at Walmart once the condoms and the women‘s conditioners are seen at the cashierś.
Last time I got to go to Cuba I was stocking up, girl at the checkout noticed all the meds and sun screen and
asked if I was going on a trip. I said yes and she was real chatty till she grabbed the xtra large box of condoms
and after that a few dozen little bottles of shampoo and conditioner and stuff like that. She wasnt nearly as
friendly after those items. Wonder why? Hehe. 172.
Mongers also experiment with non-latex condoms, which lead them to take serious risks.173 Some are aware that there are risks involved, but engaged in them anyway. Goetzvonberlishingen, for example, is aware that these condoms are not FDA- approved and have greater risks for tears or breaks. He has not had problems with the condoms; nevertheless he recognizes there is danger.
But on the flip side, I go through a couple of boxes of 50 pack latex exam gloves per day in my practice and I
would venture to say that at least 20% per box are defective either with small pin hole openings or split and tear
radically when putting them on. If condoms have as low a quality reliability as the gloves sold to the medical
profession then heaven help us all.. 174
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8. MACHISMO AND FEMINISM
Sex workers might be very different from their clients in most aspects. Nevertheless, something they both share is resentment toward their own partners. The websites that promote sex tourism provide, for example, some reasons why local women prefer Americans: Latin men, because of their ―machismo,‖
have alienated them and this has led them ―to look for softer and more enlightened types of masculinity.‖175 The majority of sex workers report in our in-depth interviews having being abused physically, mentally and economically by their local partners. Very few of them are married and most of them have children with fathers who have not assumed their paternal responsibility.
María‘s story is typical176. She was born in Turrialba, Costa Rica. She was the sixth of eight siblings, Comentario [HS1]: If she was
the daughter of a domestic servant and a gardener who fathered five of the eight children and never the sixth of eight, how come she was
took care of his own offspring, much less the ones sired by others.
the oldest?
Early on, María remembers that her father would sit her down on his lap and rub her private parts with
―something hard‖. At the time, she had no idea what was going on. The only thing that made her nervous was the father‘s rapid breathing and what she now describes as a ―demented and vigilant look‖, though she is not sure how she perceived it then. ―It was like the panting of a cornered animal,‖
she now says.
However, María recalls that things changed radically when she was 12.
Sitting on my father’s lap and feeling his member had become part of our relationship. He had told me not to
tell my mother or my brothers because what we did was ‘private’ and the others would feel envious. Sometimes
he’d give me money to buy chocolate bars and he would warn me, ‘If you talk, you’ll have to share the
chocolate with everyone.”
This sexual relationship continued for three years. But she never felt strong emotions again. ―When my father penetrated me, I did not feel anything, neither pleasure, nor pain, nor disgust or anything. I‘d feel like I had left the bed, the room, the house, because I couldn‘t feel my body. ‗You finished?‘ I‘d ask, and if he said yes I‘d get dressed and go clean the house as if nothing had happened.‖
María thinks the relationship with her father helped her in the business. ―I have to be honest with you.
For me, the fact that I could leave my body or not feel anything when I was having sex has been good for [practicing] prostitution.‖ According to María, it is easier to work as a prostitute when one is detached and can ―think of other things‖. She is convinced that a prostitute‘s greatest skill is ―being able to switch off from what she‘s doing, and feel pleasure if she wants to.‖ The years with her father
―were a training course for this profession,‖ she says.
The woman does not consider herself a sexual object, or a victim of men. ―That‘s the kind of shit that rich feminists who don‘t know anything about the poor will say,‖ she says. ―I‘m in charge of my body 175 www.spanisheyes.com
176 This story is from a study that was previously published in: Los Traileros y la vida loca by Jacobo Shifter, The Haworth Hispanic and Latino Studies a division of The Haworth Press, Inc, 1990 pp. 149-153
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and I sell it…. I don‘t hand over it for free like many women, in exchange for nothing. I‘m better off than the miserable wife who gets a cock shoved up her every night, even if she doesn‘t want it, and next day she has to be a servant to her husband.‖ She says that she works at Mas Por Menos supermarket as a front to hide the true profession. ―Do you expect me to live from $200 a month?
Working 48 hours a week? I do that in an hour at Del Buey.‖
The relationship between abuse and prostitution is more complex than would appear at first sight.
According to our 1993 survey, there is a connection between not using condoms and having suffered punishment or abuse in childhood.177 María‘s story suggests that abused girls find ways of ―switching off‖ an unpleasant event while it is happening, which would make it easier to practice prostitution.
The relationship between abuse and prostitution is more complex than would appear at first sight.
According to our 1993 survey, there is a connection between not using condoms and having suffered punishment or abuse in childhood.178 María‘s story suggests that abused women find ways of
―switching off‖ an unpleasant event while it is happening, which would make it easier to practice prostitution.
Most adults who were abused as children clearly do not practice prostitution or unsafe sex. Many prostitutes feel that their job is not abusive, and that is not really all that different from giving people manicures or a stress-relieving massage. The problem, they say, is the Christian aversion to sex, which considers prostitution not only the oldest profession but also the lowest.
However, the purpose of this work is not to explore why some women choose prostitution, but rather to explain the mutual attraction between American tourists and prostitutes. Although the answer would appear simple - that the men want sex and the women want money - the reality is more complex.
One of the interesting phenomena uncovered by these surveys is the type of men sex workers have as local ― novios. ‖ Most of these men are short, fat and bald. Ana explains that: ―Pretty boys are very spoiled and destructive in Costa Rica. In a relationship, I am the only one who is allowed to be attractive. Ugly men are more faithful.‖ This means that these women are not necessarily turned on by male beauty, either in customers or lovers. ―Good looks is irrelevant‖- says Rita. ―It is how men provide me with security what it counts for me; beautiful men are no good for that‖- she concludes.
Given this attitude, it is easier for them to find sixty-year-old fat American men attractive and desirable for relationships. ―Prostitutes are like cats‖- says a taxi driver. ―They fall in love with houses and things rather than people.‖ The attraction is not so much for the man but for the type of life he can provide.
American tourists do have an impact on the emotional life of sex workers. They manage to provide the money and respect that these women lack in their local communities. Sex workers are taken to fine restaurants, shops, hotels, casinos, nightclubs, clubs and resorts where they are treated as upper class Latin ladies. This ―entrance‖ to the sphere of the wealthy in Latin America is a passport to the good life and to a higher self-esteem. It affords them the fine food, good wines and champagne, and the fancy 177 Jacobo Schifter, Latino Truck Driver Trade. Sex and HIV in Central America, The Haworth Press, New York: 2001. p.148.
178 Jacobo Schifter, Latino Truck Driver Trade. Sex and HIV in Central America, The Haworth Press, New York: 2001. p.148.
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clothes otherwise beyond their means. The tourist industry treats them with respect and looks for these women‘s approval. Businessmen and tour guides covet them for the tourists they bring along
My girl knows she has a big fish on the hook. I am there (in CR) every month for work, I pay her well, treat her well, and she may honestly believe that I may bring her out of her current occupation (which she is dang good at, but does not like). Although, her chances of me being the White Knight are slim to none...she has a fairy tale of a better life, and I am the star! And when I am there, I treat her like a princess. I don’t know how many of you gentlemen have actually seen how most of these women live...but it is very sad and depressing. So, when they do get the chance to latch onto a nice gentleman (like most of the gents on this board) they do make the break and show emotion…179
It is not difficult to understand why the sex worker becomes hooked to this new standard of living. It empowers her, it makes her gain social approval, it allows her to live the way no one can in her local community. Prostitution also develops her business curiosity and provides training in making money.
This is not a trivial pursuit. Most sex workers start trading with clothes, jewelry, and connections and with new ideas on how to make money. Elizabeth, a Colombian sex worker, uses her sex money to import gold chains from Bogotá and sells them to Costa Rican businessmen. Maria imports fabrics from Ecuador and has a small shop in her neighborhood. Teresa sells fine wine from Chile.
This new life can be accessible thanks to either one or many men. If an American tourist is ready to commit and marry, she will have permanent access to the new status. If he is not, she is able to keep her status by having many customers. Whatever the options, the American customer is not her enemy or one who is perceived as exploitative. Sex workers have more resentment against local men than against American tourists. The latter are seen as allies in their struggle to overcome class, gender and educational handicaps.
The problem for these women is that there is very little they can give back for the Monger‘s non-machista treatment. They lack the mongers education, language, sophistication and wealth. The only thing they can provide is sex and some warmth. When the relationship becomes more passionate, bareback sex becomes her final token of appreciation.
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9.