Does he really have exceptional psychic powers?
Saturday, 24th February 1996
One of the positive aspects of the Janus case is that I have found
my good old friends, Aphrodite and Theano, again. We
occasionally meet at Aphrodite's, just like we used to some years
ago, and we revel in long, delightful conversations about our
favourite subjects: parapsychology, psychic experiences, lucid
dreaming and the like. I can say we still share a strong inner
relationship and we get along very well.
Nevertheless, I often suspect -from askance looks, certain
phrases, bored movements- that Aphrodite doesn't really like
such discussions. Besides, she is obviously more interested in
sex than metaphysics now. As she explained to me this evening,
when I visited her, during the three years we have been apart she
has gone steady with lots of men, until she ended up in a
yearlong relationship with a woman! Anyway, for the time being
she is single; she doesn't have any love affair of any kind...
Wednesday, 28th February 1996
I have arranged to meet Helen Tanagra this evening and
suggested we go to “Onar”, a wonderful cafeteria in
Argyroupolis: the decoration reminds of ancient Greece, as there
are white columns, sculpted pediments, earthen vessels, artificial
but life-like plants, supposed archaeological finds enclosed in
glass showcases on the floor, fine rock music, pleasant
ambiance.
However, as soon as we reach the threshold at 9:00 o' clock,
suddenly Helen stays still as if she were rooted to the spot. “I'm
not going in there, it's too dark!” she declares sharply. I try to
make her change her mind, assuring her that I have been in this
cafeteria before, that the environment is alright, that there is no
danger -in vain: Helen remains as solid as a rock. I have no other
alternative but run all the way to Vouliagmenis Avenue together
with her, wait for the bus to Glyfada and finally end up in a
colourless cafeteria of the common run.
Soon Helen proves to be boring and insecure, as she barely has
anything to say; in fact, every word has to be screwed out of her.
Moreover, she is always trying to prettify her public image
-rather awkwardly I'd say: Tonight, once again she told me she
has a love affair with a young man from Crete, yet they only
phone each other. She also trumpets forth that all men go crazy
about her, despite her 120 kilos, and that she has studied
microbiology ‒ yet, she has never set foot in the university. From
now on I will avoid going out with her only, as she is a
mollycoddle and she hardly talks...
Monday, 4th March 1996
For some months now I have been meeting Christina on the bus
to work every day. We always sit together and chat pleasantly as,
despite her young age, we have many common interests and we
keep good company to each other.
Especially this morning, she revealed to me many things about
herself: She is 23 years old, very sociable and popular, with a
large circle of friends! I talked to her about myself too, adding a
fib or two, that I also have many friends and that I often go out to
discos and clubs. She was impressed and she suggested my
joining her party! I accepted at once, full of joy. Then we
exchanged phone numbers and she told me she would talk to the
others about me. “Tomorrow morning I will let you know about
our next outing!” she concluded smiling and I was on cloud
nine! At last, I will start going out with a large, cheerful party of
young people, one of those I always envied but never had the
chance to approach -not even in a summer night dream, I
thought.
Tuesday, 5th March 1996
It is early in the morning and I am at the bus station, waiting
impatiently for Christina to turn up. However time goes by
slowly and she is nowhere to see. The bus is already leaving
when I see her arriving; she is running as fast as she can, yet she
misses the bus for two seconds! Maybe tomorrow, I hope.
... Nevertheless, I am never going to meet Christina again. For
some strange reason, she will never appear at the bus station
again. I will call her twice until the end of the month, I will
propose our going out together, she will promise to call me back,
but no; I will never see or hear from her again.
Doubts: Something very weird is going on under the surface of
reality. Everything looks like a foul play – but what part is mine
in all this performance? There are dark forces controlling our
existence (fate, nature, time, genes) and our lives (secret orders,
networks, institutions) with obscure purposes. I can't predict
everything, I can't escape from everything. It's time I got used to
the idea.
Neither can I believe all the rubbish propagandized by modern
cults, that there is a balance between Good and Evil in the
universe. On the contrary, it is crystal clear to me that Evil
prevails everywhere. For example, when an infant has an
accident and is paralyzed for the rest of his life, I can never
swallow the tale that “this event serves an invisible but good
purpose” or “his soul chose this because he needs this
experience”, or “he is punished for something bad he did in his
past life” and all that paranoiac piffle. Let's face the truth: The
world we live in is very far from perfect...
Sunday, 10th March 1996
It's been about a month now that I've been friends with Diana,
whom I met in the gym. She is 26 years old, she has studied
French Literature, she is a successful sales manager in a big
company which trades in books, she gets a monthly salary of
240,000 drachmas, and she has a rich social life. In two words,
she is a normal person! I can hardly believe she and I have
become friends!
At first she makes a good impression to me, as she proves to be
an intelligent, interesting, dynamic person, entirely different
from all the other friends I've had so far. On the other hand, any
time I tell her about my problems at work, such as continuous
computer breakdowns, she jumps at the opportunity to belittle
and offend me: “But what are you, a nitwit? Don't you know
how to fix a system error by yourself?” … “What kind of
company is this you work for? I think your boss is a niggard!” …
“People who do office work are stupid!”
I began to suspect what's going on with her last night, when we
went out together and she revealed more details about her job:
As a sales manager, she controls some teams of commercial
travellers. Mostly they sell in Athens, but they also travel all over
Greece and sell books door to door.
“Peasants are very easy to handle: Before they know it, they are
persuaded to buy expensive encyclopedias, which they pay by
monthly installments!” Diana said complacently.
“How is this possible? As far as I know, people hardly open their
doors to travelling salesmen!” I retorted, but Diana was ready to
answer:
“People do open their doors and buy whatever they are told, if
the salesman knows his job!”
According to Diana, salesmen are superhuman beings, a lot
superior to the average person. Firstly, they attend some special
seminars which render them omnipotent speakers, able to
persuade anyone to do anything; moreover, they get exceptional
knowledge of psychology, so that they can control perfectly the
subconscious of a potential customer, making him or her buy
whatever they want, no matter how expensive or useless it is...
Tuesday, 19th March 1996
Like any time we go out together for a coffee, once again this
afternoon Diana is trumpeting forth how proud she is of her job.
She believes she is great at what she does and she likes bragging
about it: “A good sales manager, like me, is irreplaceable! Not
like all those stupid office clerks who are all disposable!”
Then, full of arrogance, she claims it is very easy for a travelling
salesman to earn as much as 600,000 drachmas per month,
whereas the basic salary of an office employee is no more than
140,000 drachmas. “They are losers, who stupidly make do with
140,000 drachmas a month; they are cyphers, all of them!” she
cries pompously and goes on with an air of profundity: “A
businessman wants to earn as much as possible, this is natural!
He will pay you as little as he can, unless you prove to him you
deserve to be given something more!” … “A clever businessman
will hire a secretary who will work for him for a month or so ' on
trial' , then he will tell her she is incompetent and he will fire her
without paying her a dime; then he will hire another stupid chick
who will work for him for another month without payment, then
another one will take her place, and so on, until he finds the one
who will satisfy him fully” harangues Diana, showing her
admiration for bosses.
When I tell her I earn no more than 160,000 drachmas per
month, she looks at me scornfully and says: “You work in the
production department, I work in the sales department -that's the
difference! There is only one kind of work that's worth the while
today, and this is sales!” she concludes triumphantly.
“Yes, but I work only six hours a day, whereas you work ten
hours and you aren't paid any overtime! If I worked so many
hours as you, I would earn more than 250,000 per month!” I
reply and she shuts up.
Tuesday, 26th March 1996
This afternoon I saw Diana at the gym, we had an aerobics
lesson and then, as we were leaving together, she revealed to me
some more interesting details about her job; in fact, she didn't
hesitate at all to describe -always with an air of importance- a
fixed fraud committed by the company she works for: It all starts
with an advertisement they place in the newspaper every week,
looking for new commercial travellers; they offer an alluring
basic salary, as well as commission on the sales, plus social
security.
“What if someone doesn't sell enough in a month?” I wonder.
“Every would-be salesman signs a contract which contains a
penal clause: If the salesman doesn't sell enough within the first
month of work, which is ' on trial'', they are not only fired
without being paid but they also have to pay 50,000 drachmas to
the company!” she explains with glowing eyes.
“Amazing! Maybe I could organize a trick like this so as to earn
some serious money!” I exclaim spontaneously.
“Our company offers you two weeks of free seminars!” snorts
Diana. “These lessons provide you with all the knowledge you
need so as to manipulate customers and sell books. If you don't
sell, it means you are a moron and the company has suffered a
loss by allowing you to participate in the seminars. So, they do
what's right: they fire you, they don't give you a dime and they
make you pay the penal clause!”
“What if someone refuses to pay?”
“If anyone dares oppose to us, our team of lawyers will take their
pants!”
“I bet the company earns more from penal clauses than from
book sales!” I conclude.
... That explains it: Lately I have heard about certain persons
who, though illiterate, have become successful travelling
salesmen and earn up to 700,000 drachmas per month! Taking
into account that a salesman's commission is no higher than
10%, how do they manage to make sales of 7,000,000 drachmas
every month? What do they really sell? Encyclopedias? Come on
now! Nowadays you can find cheap and voluminous
encyclopedias in bookstores or, even, on offer in newspapers!
Why would anyone pay dearly a commercial traveller? Unless
they sell other things, other ' services' , instead of books...
Tuesday, 11th June 1996
I barely go out with Diana anymore, I don't like her and she
doesn't like me; yet I still meet her at the gym. This afternoon
she looked distracted but triumphant, as she showed me two or
three circular bruises on her right hand; looking at them more
carefully, I saw they were bites.
“Did a dog bite you?” I asked her.
“No! It was a would-be saleswoman!” she answered, and I was
flabbergasted.
Then, with an air of importance, she narrated the whole story to
me: Yesterday morning a young woman came into Diana's office;
she aspired to become a professional commercial traveller, she
was beautiful and well-dressed, with a pleasant personality; in
two words, she looked suitable for the job. She also signed the
contract without reading the “small letters” -just like most
candidates do. However, as soon as she realized the fraud (too
late), she pounced on Diana and fought very hard to grab the
contract from her hands and tear it up -she even bit her!
Unfortunately for the girl, in the end she didn't manage to take
the contract from Diana's hands.
“Our lawyers are going to put her into very serious trouble!”
went on Diana, glowing with exhilaration. “I have already sued
her, because that imbecile bit a nerve on my hand and I can't
close it well now!” – humbug: there is nothing wrong with
Diana's hand. “I will ask her to make amends to me for this
injury, I can demand three million drachmas at least, our lawyers
say! Woo is her, who dared tangle with me!” Diana burst out, full
of anger.
“Will it be so simple? Won't she also hire a lawyer?”
“Nobody can confront the lawyers of our company!” Diana
exclaimed, obviously vexed. “Their main job is to take care of
all those nitwits who refuse to pay the penal clause!” While
shouting, she got even more exasperated: “My fair lady, you
were stupid enough to sign the contract! So, pay the fifty
thousand and let us be!” she screamed like a drama actress.
After we had left the gym, Diana stopped at a telephone booth so
as to phone her lawyer, as she told me. I stood at a distance and
waited, but she kept shouting – I guess on purpose, because she
wanted me to hear and envy her: “So, I can ask for even more
money... four million drachmas... maybe more! Fine, fine! Thank
you very much!” … “You see?” she smiled to me cunningly as
soon as she hung up. “That's why you must always have a lawyer
handy! Better yet, have not only one, but many! In this way, you
can make a lot of money from suckers! I am going to leave that
bitch penniless!” she concluded triumphantly.
“Why don't you send her to me too? I need some millions of
drachmas too!”
“But... but she won't make the same mistake again!” Diana
stuttered; obviously, she didn't get the irony.
“Tell her to come and find me in Pangaea, on the fifth floor! She
shouldn't go to the third floor, the bosses are there and they don't
need any more money! I do!” I kept on pulling her leg.
I will never find out how this story ends. I will see Diana at the
gym two more times till the end of the month and that's all...
Tuesday, 18th June 1996
This evening I had an unexpected phone call from Rena, one of
the most “advanced” disciples in Janus – she also happens to be
the secretary of the centre. With remarkable politeness, as well as
subtle pressure, she asked me to translate (free of charge, of
course) Alexander's book “Self-knowledge and Metaphysics”
from Greek into English as soon as possible, so that they can
present it at the Book Fair of Frankfurt in October.
I accepted willingly, because I wanted to show good will,
obedience and a spirit of service to the leaders of Janus, hoping
they will eventually begin to like me. Right from tomorrow I will
start working on the translation feverishly, aiming to finish it by
the end of summer. It should be noted that the book is rather
badly-written...
Thursday, 20th June 1996
As I was informed by an advertisement posted up all over the
city of Athens, a famous lama has just arrived in Greece. He is of
European origin but he has spent many years in Tibet; for many
years now, he has been travelling all over the world teaching
Tibetan Buddhism. This afternoon he is giving a lecture about
how to face unhappiness. He seems to be a very agreeable
person, and the subject interests me a lot; moreover, the lecture is
taking place at a centre of Buddhism which is only some metres
away from Aphrodite's house!
I wish to attend the lecture but I would rather not go alone, so at
about noon I phone Aphrodite and let her know. I expect her to
be enthusiastic about it, yet I am nonplussed at her immediate
frigidity: “I have nothing to do this afternoon, but I am not in the
mood of going to such a lecture, I had better stay home alone,”
she announces in a low voice and leaves me wondering, since
she has always given me the impression of being very interested
in such matters. I try to bring her round, she resists, I emphasize
I will come all the way from Glyfada, while she will only have to
walk some metres; she grumbles a little more and finally she
says in a plaintive voice: “Alright, Yvonne, I will come. But you
should know I will do so just because a friend is asking me to,
there is no other reason!”. I don't like this conclusion, but I act
the fool so as to achieve my goal.
We meet outside the centre of Buddhism at 8:00 o' clock. I
wonder again, because Aphrodite doesn't seem to be bored or
sulky now, she looks cheerful and lively. The lama proves to be
quite agreeable and interesting, he answers all questions
carefully and diplomatically, he surely knows how to win his
audience over to his views. He speaks English and one of his
disciples translates his words into Greek. At a moment, he
advises us: “When bad things happen to you, instead of thinking
' I am unhappy'', you had better think ' There is unhappiness in
the world''. In this way, you won't be feeling like a target any
more!”
This statement makes me think because it breaks the Ego; on the
other hand, it is a reasonable way to fight that dominant
impression I have had ever since I was an infant: I have never
stopped feeling like a target of visible and invisible evil forces,
though I often try to ignore it. Maybe this feeling is nothing
more than selfishness in disguise -according to the lama and
most gurus...
* * * *
Wednesday, 31st July 1996The truth is I am disappointed from life. No matter how hard I
try to achieve something in any field of life, the result is always
poor or naught. That's why I have returned to Janus, that's why I
am ready to go to Alexander's asram again, despite the fiasco of
'92. This time I am even willing to pay 90,000 drachmas for ten
days. The price includes accommodation in tents and full board.
On the other hand, this is the best proposal for holidays I've had
this summer. I know I won't have a good time but I am leaving
tomorrow morning...
Sunday, 11th August 1996
All things considered, it was much nicer than I thought; the
asram has been improved a lot since 1992: A spacious cottage
has been built to the west, and another one is under construction
nearby. To the south there is a vast field of cultivated vegetables.
The central field is still full of nut-trees at the shadow of which
we have set up our tents. In the middle there is a picturesque
pond full of goldfish; it is decorated with a wooden bridge, stone
banks and a green islet with a palm-tree on top. To the east they
have constructed a big tank, which receives water from the
spring and serves mostly as a swimming pool. To the north there
is a well-built stone wall; behind it, the thick forest of fir-trees.
Every day we followed a specific routine which, although it
restricted our freedom a little, made life simpler: In the morning
we performed various tasks such as cooking, cleaning the house
and the lavatories, washing the dishes etc. I also managed to
finish the translation of “Self-Knowledge and Metaphysics”
from Greek into English ‒ that's about 200 pages in one and a
half month! To my surprise, though, I found out the same task
had been assigned to Danae, who had hardly finished the first
chapter!
In the afternoon we all went to the swimming pool; we swam
from 5:00 to 6:00 every day, together with the three huge dogs
that roamed about the estate: one belongs to Alexander and the
other two belong to close disciples of his. Very soon the water
was full of dog hairs but nobody ever complained. I only
wondered: Couldn't the animals swim right after we had come
out of the pool?
In the evenings, all twenty of us gathered around the big table
outside the cottage. Some guys played the guitar and we all sang
various songs, Greek or foreign, under the stars. It felt
wonderful...
During my stay in the asram I also had the opportunity to
improve my relationship with Maria Glenos, with whom I shared
the tent. We took part in interesting discussions, we played
volleyball with the others, we walked to the nearby village every
afternoon. On the fourth day, I was happy to see Aphrodite and
Theano arrive at the asram.
In general, we all got along very well; in fact, I was surprised to
realize there were no whims, disagreements, or quarrels among
us during these ten days in the asram; I mean, if you take twenty
“normal” persons and send them on holidays together, pretty
soon they won't be able to tolerate each other. When I explained
these thoughts of mine to Maria, she commented that “The guru
has done a very good job with his disciples.”
In the morning of my departure, as we were all sitting around the
big table taking breakfast, Alexander turned to me and thanked
me for the translation I finished so quickly. According to his
publisher, I have done “a very good job, but the book has
changed style”. Then he turned to another disciple and proposed
her correcting my translation, so that the text will return to its
original style. I smiled and accepted the guru's review – which
was nothing more than one of his tricks for breaking Egos. I only
explained that when a book is translated into another language, it
inevitably changes style. So, that was my reward for the hard,
specialized and unpaid work of one and a half month: The guru
talked to me for ten whole minutes (something unprecedented
within the five years in total I have attended Janus), he advised
me to wear more modern clothes and nicer glasses, and he made
clear that men av