If you’re Brave Enough To Stay
Sleepless nights,
Thoughts are a blight.
This blanket covers me,
But I'm shaking, freezing cold.
Good enough was never in my reach,
Was it happiness I wanted?
Or for others to be happy with me?
The trouble with thinking when I should be sleeping is that
When you are asleep you cannot control your dreams and can blame your subconscious for them,
But when you are thinking,
Your conscious is the one in control, so in essence it is you putting yourself down and not the back of your head.
I used to get so sad I would end up getting mad,
Now I get so sad that I go numb,
Drowning in all of my sadness and hopelessness,
Is it that well disguised?
Because I figured that someone would notice my demise.
But they can't see the sadness in my eyes.
Or how I count all the lies,
Compliments are shaky because I often want to cry,
Sometimes my sole wish is to die,
Sometimes I get so sad I can't even try.
Life goes on and no matter what we feel it will continue,
Even when a young boy drops off the fifth floor onto the avenue,
His family left heartbroken,
But when he was breathing his family's torment choked him.
Maybe it didn't matter how he felt,
Or it didn't matter the sadness that caused his heart to melt.
None of it matters when you're gone away,
It will only matter if you're brave enough to stay.