40.
those two pages were an ocean
yet despite the vastness of majnuun’s eyes
they were too small to collect
the ocean’s immensity
thus, some parts became a cascading blur
but what his mind could grasp
shined with the clarity
of an illuminated diamond
“with the name of the most high i begin
although the waves of creation bring us not
pleasant tides
remiss i would be to not acknowledge
the lord of the worlds
for it is that lord who placed within mine heart
mine undying love for thee
a treasure i will relinquish never
even if all the suffering of this cruel world
becomes mine to bear...
“i write as one imprisoned
in the bondage of melancholy
although prison bars confine thee not
thou endureth the same punishment for our love
we are both charged guilty despite our innocence
our torments, though hard to bear,
have become the bond of our devotion...
“ay, i have been sentenced to the torture of
unwanted matrimony, a grievous pestilence
yet know to thee i remain loyal,
committed solely to thee
the one called mine husband
is but a watch guard who will never have
admittance to my bed
the flower of my temple i reserve
to thee alone
or to death
these words i share fully acknowledging
we may never be able to live our union in this world
but this world is not our final destination...
“since the grace of thy face i cannot touch
a lock of thine hair send me
to sate my finger’s longing
and if a rock stubs thy precious toe, send it to me
so i too may bruise my foot upon it
to follow the path of thy pain
the water that reflects thy moonlight i yearn to be
in the stillness of the night i will remain patient
although this waxing of the new moon
hath been long in occurring
it will attain a fullness the world can no longer deny
even if its light must burn through the night’s clouds
to answer the calling vapors of the waters below
even if the day must be eclipsed with a shadowing veil
to reveal thy form in the daylight,
thy moon will show
then will our eyes meet again within thy shimmer
our hands touch,
our mouths be devoured in deep kisses
and our heartbeats we will feel,
one upon the other
to inhale our fleeting breaths as one...
“one sin i must confess to thee, my beloved
it is my weakness to not flee in desperation
to the desert
this impotence i cannot explain nor justify
it simply is
in my frailty, i succumb to my captivity
rather than risk the possibility
of dying in pursuit of thee
yet this choice is not one of surrender nor defeat
instead,
with faith and persevering patience
my battle i wage
whereas my tears mark the days in isolation
steadfast and assured mine heart remains:
we will be together
whether in this world or beyond
this i know without doubt
“so let not sadness and separation diminish our hope
the distance between our bodies lessens not
the inseparable union of our souls
today fate toils the rows
but the harvest season is not far off
today the plough breaks the earth,
and breaks you and breaks me
for some reason, this is how our destiny
is being sowed
but with continued tilling
the treasure lost will be uncovered
the seeds of our love will not go wasted
the existence of our love is not in vain
“yet this speaks to the days of our bodies
what is that compared to the eternity of souls
where what is always is
even if masqueraded by fickle time
in eternity,
we are always together in bliss
even if our minds struggle to see this
beyond the illusion of passing days
so it is with our love, my love
any other way it cannot be
remember this truth
remember me
and remember allaah, my beloved
i am forever yours,
your layla”
the letter read more like a prayer than a message
and majnuun died in that prayer
no words could describe
the state which overcame him
barely conscious with a half smile
the words seemed to seep past the barrier of his lips
“yaa allaah... yaa allaah... yaa allaah...”
even the animals swooned to the rhythm
of this spontaneous, unintended chant
some of his companions smiled
others swayed, others sighed
others found motion in motionlessness
a sight reflecting traces of paradise
as majnuun was returned
from that realm where only true lovers go
his eyes swelled with torrents of tears
yet he would not be deterred
by the blinding waterfalls
he felt his way to the feet of the old man
and literally washed them
with wet kisses and tears
“i must send a reply in writing
but where am i to find paper and pen”
the old man smiled
because his foresight had already tended to this
from his bag he pulled out a heap of paper,
a few quill pens, and vials of ink
majnuun made the sand his bed
spread out a piece of paper
and began to write
what impetuously poured forth from his heart...
❍ ● ❍