46.
“hath the intimacy of our distance been erased
to bestow the glory of thine eyes looking into mine
the world is parting yet in thy love i am consumed
no separation can even approach mine heart,
which beats devoted only to you
how shall i sleep when thou art the only dream
that closes mine eyes
wakefulness without the thought of thee
is non-existence
of what worth is eternity if i only have
these passing seconds with thee
let these present breaths be the whole of my life
and happily fulfilled is my destiny
“oh layla,
words fail now that i am in thy presence
why imitate the quintessence of thy beauty
with words
when i am fallen before thee
ahh, the nectar of paradise i am served
just by raising the cup,
i have become intoxicated with thee...”
and thus,
the torrent so overflowed, it stopped
a silence emerged that seemed to still
the whole universe
in the shadows of that shady path
their gaze became more than one
as if layla and majnuun ceased to exist
there was only the light of love
reflecting upon the space
between and within their eyes
majnuun descended into a vision
in which he stood and approached her
each step shifting the momentum of all time
he stood before her
their breaths dancing between each other’s lips
ready to kiss
the pull of ecstatic temptation
aroused anticipation
but...
as he extended his hand to touch her
he awoke
and there was distance
again
and separation
again
the intimacy of just being
ten steps away from her
felt cosmically enormous
it all became too much to bear
to be so near and yet so far
to be within reach yet forbidden to her touch
a convoluting tension
she too was entranced within it
looking away from his adulterous gaze
even as she savored his stare
she grasped intensely at the memory
of this experience
even as it was occurring
ambitiously clutching at vapors
she was determined to not forget any
unfolding detail
as if she could prevent the eventual decay
of its remembrance
but all memories fade somewhat
including the most cherished ones
but for him
it was way-way-way too much
such that he jumped up and ran away
a haunt to his own ecstasy
which would not be left behind
by his fleeing
to stand before her
would not have been enough
a touch of the hand would have surely ensued
and a touch of the hand
would not have been enough
a kiss would have surely ensued
and a kiss
would not have been enough
a fall into adulterous pleasure would have been
unavoidable
and once thus scarred, how could his love,
their love
remain pure
for the sake of keeping their love unsullied
distance and departure were best
and somehow somewhere within
he knew this
even while being strangled by desire
it was better to not place an obstacle
to piety’s eventual triumph
which would inevitably bestow their union
if not in this world,
surely in the sweetness of paradise
but these were majnuun’s thoughts
for layla,
thoughts were an afterthought
to the silent swooning of her mind
although she couldn’t really see his departure
she felt when his presence was gone
and with his absence
there was no longer a reason to continue
her struggle to remain conscious
thereby,
she collapsed to the ground
ravaged in ecstatic despair
how could such happiness
feel so tormenting
and such sadness feel
blissful...
❍ ● ❍