Hao- the attitude of Wittiness
Sandeep Atre; a profound motivational speaker of our city in one of the IMA conclave said- as an individual if we wish to achieve something in life, we need to take our work seriously and our ego lightly. Even our traditional value system says- work is worship. Problem arises when we give our ego more importance than our work. Once we begin to worship our ego and not our work, we cannot expect success from life.
Wittiness is not just about being knowledgeable; wittiness is associated with the art of living life with fun, humor and joyfulness. You might have seen this phenomenon, that people with a good sense of humor have a very attractive persona, they are liked by all. Such people are a centre of attraction in social gatherings. Humor reinforces relationships of an individual with his family, friends and even coworkers. Good sense of humor helps to reduce pressure, it helps to relieve stress. Everyone wants to associate with such a person who can make them smile, who adds the fragrance of positivity in their life. It is a hard fact that people avoid pessimism and depressed people because depression begets depression; it is a kind of transfer of energy.
Happiness begets happiness. The true source of this happiness is hidden within us. The real life story of Chris Gardner presented in reel life as the Hollywood movie – In Pursuit of Happyness is a perfect example to understand that the real happiness is hidden in the “Y” of the misspelled word- here Y stands for you. Happiness is inside us, the hao attitude is the attitude of searching this hidden source of joy with hopes, aspirations and positive outlook.
Intelligence is not a bookish concept; it is the ability to adjust and adapt with the circumstances.
The hao attitude of living life with a light heart comes from the general understanding that life is full of probabilities and possibilities. What seems like a tragedy at the moment becomes a comedy once you look back to it after a few years. The first crush, the first zero in the exam test, the lost football match, the train I missed two years ago- when I look back, I laugh on myself for I realize how stupid I was when I cried on such trivial things.
The things which made no long term impact on my life, and even if I have failed the best part is I learned, a new experience was added in my journey of life; making it a little more interesting. If I have failed and I have survived I have stories full of turns and twist associated with my life; at least I have something to share with my grandchildren. So, it totally depends on me what meaning I want to give to my past experiences – if I want to call it as a tragedy and choose to live a Devdas (a sad drunkard man) like life, this is solely my interpretation and my choice. Nobody else is to be blamed for my decisions. On the other hand, if I learn to take things on a lighter note as if life is not a tragedy dude, but a romantic comedy where every day is full of new experiences, possibilities and laughter, I have changed the genre of the story of my life.
Situation could be of any type but my reaction to it is governed by me. Stephen Covey the author of one of the most admired books- The 7 Habits of highly effective people shares a thought provoking idea, when he explained that the centre of focus in our life should be internal and not external. If I learn to shift my focus on internal self and become responsible for the things happening in my life, I develop a greater sense of self control. Having an internal locus of control means I am taking the charge of my life instead of blaming the circumstances. I failed not because my teacher didn’t taught me well; the question paper was tough but because I didn’t study hard, I didn’t gave my best. Self-serving bias is a trick used by the brain to fool us. The earlier we learn to accept our mistake, the faster we grow.
My reactions towards a situation changes because my perception has changed, I don’t consider myself as helpless instead now I feel more hopeful because I am training my brain to focus on solving the problem. This is the reason why the wise people ask us to take time when we analysis things- do not react but respond.
Ask any Indoriee and I am cent percent sure that most of us would be able to associate the usage of Hao with a sense of comedy in our life. When you treat life like a farce; you kill all the natural inhibitors of growth and success- anxiety, tension and stress are all murdered by your attitude. Besides the laughter which it adds in life leads to a healthier happier version of you :)
People with a good sense of humor have a great common sense; it is a sign of high IQ, irony is common sense is not that common. The ability to find humor in small little things in life is an art. They say the happiest adults allow the child inside to continue to play.
The hao-logy behind the attitude of wittiness is a desire to be child-like. There is a difference between being childish and being child-like. When you are childish you act irresponsibly, childishness is linked to immaturity but child-like attitude directs us towards the constructive sides of childhood i.e. innocence, simplicity, curiosity, innovation, honesty, and the ability to let go. As per Hindu mythology, childhood is connected with Lord Ganesha. His divinity is hidden in his innocence and child-like attitude. The ability to remain a child at heart is a blessing, it seems like an unachievable goal but one can always strive for excellence.
When it comes to living life light-heartedly with full vigor my mother is my inspiration; her sense of humor is truly admirable. She is a typical indoriee; the more I observe her ways of living, the more I love her. She will kill all your pain by her Hao attitude- the sense of humor part of it. Undoubtedly women and their EQ are unquestionable.
Once I was sick, a normal throat infection; life in a modern world has become so demanding that even a minor throat infection comes with a “treat me with medicine” attitude; gone are the days when you could cure normal cough and cold by drinking turmeric in milk and gargling throat with hot-salted water. Everything in life demands your attention, time, money and pampering as if they are your girlfriend. Out of helplessness I had to go the physician near-by. Trust me I have never seen a doctor like him; he is just so relaxed, no matter how much of commotion, blunder, Hassel goes around him he will continue with his own mild and timid pace. Yes, of course he is the best doctor in our area but he is too peaceful in his approach.
I often associate his personality with a giant mighty elephant intoxicated by his own sense of pleasure that cares for none because he is the ultimate owner of the jungle. I have seen Lion King movie but when I see him I realize we can make another movie; Mr.. doctor elephant king.
Anyways, so I was sitting with my mother in his clinic waiting for my number; although we took a formal appointment of 8:30 pm we finally got inside his chamber at 9:30 pm. Murphy’s law was at its full strength- the more my desire of getting free as soon as possible, the further delay was happening. It was not the doctor’s fault; he is a doctor he had to deal with the emergency cases as well. If I would have gone with my father or any other family member chances were I would have expressed my frustration and might have fought with him, but thankfully my companion was mom, so for the next 15-20 minutes we were still sitting on the couch in front of his desk.
As soon as he went out just to deal with an emergency case, my mom whispered in my ears- don’t you feel he is an expert in putting soap on people’s faces and making them wait for as long as possible for the actual cleansing. She commented sarcastically, an obvious reaction which is ought to come because it was 10pm by now; he is such a clever man- how soothingly he gives sweet poison to people. I could not control my laughter- I laughed like a fanatic.
This happens so many times when she makes us laugh in our blues making any frustrating-torturing incident be it a journey or dealing with an annoying relative; she makes it appear easy like a piece of cake by her Hao attitude of great comic sense and timing. Mothers are the best medicine; they are those magicians who can solve your any problem by their wit and loving attitude. Such antecedent reminds me of the famed saying of Bill Cosby- “Through humor, you can soften, some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be. You can survive it.”
The last fundamental of Hao- attitude is as easy as smile, even if you feel blue!!!