‘I Love You’
Somehow I was dating my best friend. I would say approximately two months into dating I was in love with Pat. Every time we were getting off the phone the natural thing I wanted to say was “I love you,” and I felt that Patrick thought the same thing. I knew that Pat and I thought a lot alike so I figured he wanted to tell me that he loved me. Patrick devised a cute plan to stop talking on the phone and write letters to each other instead as if it were the good old days before the Internet and phone. I love to write, so naturally this appealed to me. Of course I would miss hearing his voice terribly, but how cool would it be to get a letter from him.
Patrick sent the first letter and now it was my turn to send one back. Somehow I got the idea to be the first one to say, “I love you” in a letter. I was too scared to be the first one to say it over the phone. The general pattern in our relationship was Patrick being the initiator; I mean, he initiated this letter-writing thing. To change things up a little, I wanted to be the one to initiate something.
It was now or never. Patrick’s letter had spoken to my heart, and now it was my turn to put pen to paper and write this thing. I drafted a couple of letters before the real thing, then I wrote, “I think I am falling in love with you.” I folded the letter up, placed it in the envelope, sealed it and waited for the mailman to pick it up. As he took it, immediately all I wanted to do was take it back. Everything in me wanted to kick myself, Why in the world would I write that? I started to get flustered. It was too late by now; it was gone and there was no turning back.
The next day I got a call from Patrick, and there was no way he had gotten my letter yet. I picked up thinking he called me by mistake. He called because he couldn’t take it anymore; he hadn’t gotten my letter yet and he really couldn’t wait to talk to me. I was blushing like you wouldn’t believe. I was so happy to hear his voice again. Pat was telling me that he thought the letter thing was a bad idea. He couldn’t stand us not talking to each other.
Being the punk that I am, I explained to Pat that I sent my letter but told him “When it comes do not read it.” I was serious. I really wanted him to tell me when it got there and to throw it away as soon as it did. One day passed, and he hadn’t gotten the letter. The next day passed and still no letter; the third day passed, and then I believe on the fourth day the letter arrived. Patrick didn’t call me when it arrived, of course. He called me after he read it to tell me in a really silly voice that he received the letter. Then he says, “I love you too.” I was screaming on the inside, He loves me!! I told him how scared I was and that I really meant it; I really did love him. He then said that he was talking to one of his closest friends, Phat, just the day before asking him how do you know that you love someone. Patrick and I are always on the same page. I love this man; he is truly my soul mate; it’s as if we are the same person sometimes. I am telling you, God even makes fairytales come true; actually God’s plans are better than any fairytale!
As we wrapped up our conversation, we each said, “I love you,” and we hung up the phone. Again I became overwhelmed with a joy you can’t even imagine. Honestly I was floored by how much God loved me. I couldn’t swallow how much God cared about me. He really didn’t have to bless me in this way. My soul was overwhelmed.
1/11/13
So Pat got my letter and he really likes it and keeps reading it over and over. And he feels the same way. And it's not a giddy omg! I love you. It's a hmm I think I love you. It's not irrational, quick, spur of the moment. It's thought out, prayed on, and look how cute it turned out. To where I mailed it to him and he got it and was blown away. He didn't expect it at all either, which is a good surprise. I'm falling in love w/ Pat. I'm falling before he is. It's funny b/c he said he spoke to Phat yesterday about when do you know you love someone? And then boom, the next day he gets my letter.
1/14/13
We spoke today for about an hour after I had gotten off of work. And when we were about to get off the phone, he said "I love you" I was like ....speechless. I had to soak it in that he just told me that he loves me. Before this though, he told me that he's never said I love you or fallen in love w/ any previous gf. And he's dated seriously before. Again floored! I am in love w/ him and idk how to even process all of this. He is truly my best friend! Even this convo we had on the phone today was soooo funny. I could be myself around him and this is so cool! I cherish that, and I don't want to lose the friendship.