Forgiveness
Is a personal choice which is why I cover it here and not in marriage, what happens when someone betrays your trust?
Do you cut them out of your life or do you forgive them?
It’s said that to err is human but to forgive is divine but we are after all still human so it’s kind of hard to be divine, which is why forgiveness is something that you don’t see being done too regularly.
The Bible teaches us that Jesus died for our sins and that we should try and emulate him as much as possible.
Easier said than done to truly forgive someone is probably one of the hardest things for us to do. People think that starting and ending a relationship is hard, they think saying I love is hard but have you ever tried to truly forgive someone?
It’s not that easy for me to say that you forgive someone means you doing two things the first: accept their apology and the second: move on.
I always say to people how can you say that you forgave someone if you are constantly bringing up their past transgression? If you forgave them then why are you constantly judging them by what they did?
Which brings us back to marriage and forgiveness there, if I do something wrong and I ask for forgiveness I expect my wives to never bring that issue up again if they forgive me but if they do that means that haven’t forgiven me.
So before you say that you forgive someone truly think about it because if you don’t forget you haven’t actually forgiven.
So my friends always ask this so I’m just going to include it.
What if you’re Wife Cheats on You?
Difficult question because it all depends on the individual me personally I would have to ask myself some questions the first being why?
What was I doing wrong because if you are honest with yourself a person will never cheat on you if there is nothing wrong with you, there must be something about that other person that makes them attractive to them otherwise why would they cheat?
Honestly if a person cheats on your or breaks up with you it has to be you that’s the problem so that is what I would do first find out why.
The second thing for me would be to see if she wants to remain in the marriage and also how she feels about the person she had the affair with and the final thing would be to see if I still want to be in the marriage and if the answer is yes.
Then I need to forgive them and most importantly to forgive her if we both choose to remain in the marriage then it needs to be as if it never happened.
People find this hard to accept so let me share a story with you.
A friend of mine cheated on her husband and the man she cheated with was someone she worked with her husband caught her and they both chose to stay in the marriage. But he hadn’t really forgiven her and one day he went to her job and saw her talking to a man. When she got home he accused her of cheating on him once more and of course she denied it but he wasn’t having any of it and he demanded she choose her job or her family.
This is a case of not forgiving someone because he couldn’t let the issue go and to this day he still doubts her.
People have also asked me about this thing I have of it being your fault and they say what if a man beats his wife?
That is not a man because a real man treats his wife like a queen and puts her above himself. I always say that a man who hits a woman is frustrated with the world and is unable to deal with the pressures exerted on him and so takes it out on his wife.