What if you’re Husband Cheats on You?{2}
Difficult question because it all depends on the individual the first thing you need to know is why?
What was I doing wrong because if you are honest with yourself a person will never cheat on you if there is nothing wrong with you, there must be something about that other person that makes them attractive to them otherwise why would they cheat?
Honestly if a person cheats on your or breaks up with you it has to be you that’s the problem so that is what I would do first find out why.
The second thing would be to see if he wants to remain in the marriage and also how he feels about the person he had the affair with and the final thing would be to see if you still want to be in the marriage and if the answer is yes.
Then you need to forgive{3} them and most importantly to forgive him if you both choose to remain in the marriage then it needs to be as if it never happened.
People find this hard to accept so let me share another story with you.
A couple we knew had been married for ten years and they were the poster Childs for a good marriage when a few weeks before their eleventh wedding anniversary it’s revealed that he cheated on her.
He met a woman at a bar and one thing led to another and they had sex, he immediately regretted the decision and confessed all to her and she was mad but she stayed with him I don’t know why but she did it.
But from that day onwards she was constantly on his case if he was a second late she’d be on him accusing him of cheating again and eventually it eroded their marriage, but they stayed together.
Stuck in a loveless marriage, which is why I say in this case it’s best to be apart.
I always say forgiveness is a two part process you need to accept that person’s apology and then you need to forget the reason for this is because if you harbor feelings of anger and resentment you provide another avenue for the devil to corrupt you and to cause your downfall.{4}
So earlier I’d said that with a woman not only should she forgive her husband but she should if the circumstances are correct encourage him to take her as a second wife.
Which begs the question what are those right circumstances?
Well an affair as we’ve stated before is not just limited to what the flesh does but in this case it’s a good starting place for me a good candidate is a woman he hasn’t slept with yet because it proves to me that he isn’t interested in her just because of her body.
But what if they have done the deed?
The first thing is does he want to stay in the marriage if yes, then ask yourself and him this question does he still want to be with her if the answer is yes than you need to figure out what kind of woman is she and if she will fit in with your family. For me a woman who sleeps with a man knowing full that his married is not one to recommend because her sole intention is destroy him and that which was sanctioned by the Lord marriage.
If she didn’t know that he was married then the fault is with him because what man who truly loves his wife would lie about being married?
So what woman do you recommend? For me it all boils down to the sign for the one and whether or not the rules of courtship were followed.
Because more often than not men are serial cheaters so how many times are you supposed to forgive and encourage?
Once is a mistake twice it’s a habit.
At the beginning of the book while I was still living with my uncle I stopped praying and asking for forgiveness and the reason for this is that I didn’t see a point in asking for forgiveness if I was just going to do the same thing tomorrow.
The Bible does teach us to forgive and I’m not disagreeing with that however to forgive them doesn’t mean that you have to stick around while they make a fool of you.