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Loving Yourself
Many Christians have a problem with the concept of self-love because self-love sounds too much like pride. God commands us to love our neighbor as OUR SELF. I previously thought loving self was being prideful. I realized if God was commanding me to love myself, He must not be speaking of pride, but of something else. Pride is sin and God would never lead us into or command us to commit sin.
Pride will always give us a perverted self-image. It is a perverted form of self-love. Pride always leads us away from God and into many sinful and sorrowful situations. Pride is the sin that transformed Lucifer from the “covering cherub” to the dastardly devil he is today. Pride is the scourge of mankind. God gives grace to the humble, but he “resists” the proud.
The sin of pride is a perverted and distorted preoccupation with self. Pride produces selfishness, greed and egotism. Pride says everything I do and say must be for me, myself and I, and no one else matters. Pride is an attitude of self-worship. Pride breeds contention. (Proverbs, 13:10). When pride comes, then comes shame. (Proverbs, 11:2). Pride is detestable to Jehovah. (Proverbs, 16:5). We become our own god when we allow pride to sit upon the throne of our heart. There is nothing good that can be said about pride.
There is probably no greater sin than the sin of pride. Pride is a “spiritually infectious disease” which permeates the hearts and minds of men with ALL the filthiness of the flesh. The Bible gives us many warnings regarding the traps, perils and consequences of pride.
A wise man once said God was commanding us to have a good self-image when He was commanding us to love ourselves. Although I think a good self-image is needed, I do not think that is what God was referring to. A good self-image is needed in order for us to have self-esteem. If we have a negative image of ourselves as Christians, we will be reluctant to go boldly before the throne of God asking for His help in our time of need. A prideful man will approach God in his time of need never acknowledging his sinful nature and his petitions will be rejected. A godly man with a good self-image will approach the Lord in his time of need with boldness and faith, expecting his petitions to be granted.
If we have a poor self-image, we will more than likely be oppressed and depressed when we look in the mirror. That is human nature. On the other hand, a positive self-image will help us build self-esteem and we will not be ashamed of ourselves when we are in the presence of the Lord or around others.
If we do not love God we cannot love our neighbor or our self. Love is of God. If we do not show and possess the love of God for others, we will not be able to love our self or others with the God-kind of love. If we do not love God, we cannot and will not have the God-kind of faith, because faith WORKS by HIS love.
In order to love yourself, you must first have a good self-image. I am not talking about loving who “you” are, but who you are in Christ Jesus. I realize in making this statement that there are many people who are prideful of who and what they THINK they are in Christ. This is called “spiritual pride.” Spiritual pride comes when people are partaking of the “pride of life” fruit from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. Spiritual pride is another form of selfishness and self- centeredness. We will never get an audience with the King of Kings unless we first repent of the sin of “spiritual pride.”
The Bible says that no individual ever hated their own flesh. When I was lost and without Christ, I felt like I hated myself because of the wrong things I was doing. However, after I came to Christ, I realized it was the sins I had committed which I hated, and not myself. I was not pleased with myself, but I did not hate myself. God looks at us in much the same way. He hates the sin, but He has compassion on the sinner because He knows the sinner does not have the power within himself to quit sinning without Christ.
We cannot love our neighbor unless we love ourselves. If we do not love our neighbor, we must realize our problem is not with our neighbor but our self. If we are going to adhere to the commandment to “love our neighbor as our self,” we must first learn how to love ourselves the Biblical way.
For those who have not forgiven themselves of past sins they committed, self-forgiveness becomes the first step to loving self. When God has forgiven us of our sins, we must not play God and continue to condemn ourselves of the sins for which we have been forgiven. We should not be our own judge, jury and executioner when it comes to the sins of the past. When God has forgiven us of our sins, we must also forgive ourselves. The Bible says that God tossed our sins into the sea of forgetfulness the moment we repented and accepted Christ as our Lord and Savior. Self- forgiveness is the KEY to finding happiness, peace and joy in the Lord.
For years, even though I knew God had forgiven me, I was unable to forgive myself for the sins I had committed in the past. I did not have the knowledge and understanding which I now have of how the plan of salvation works. Even though I had been saved, I continued to hold a grudge against myself for the sins I had committed in the past. I finally realized that in the past I was unable to quit sinning because I did not have the power or ability within me to stop sinning WITHOUT Christ. At that time, I was missing the one fundamental TRUTH which could help me to stop sinning, JESUS.
Self-condemnation is one of Satan’s greatest weapons. If he can get us to condemn ourselves after God has forgiven us, he can keep us from understanding how the love, grace and mercy of God works. Today self-condemnation continues to be a stumbling block for many Christians. It brings many heartaches, heartbreaks and spiritual illusions which contradict the Word of God and confuses the hearts and minds of many Christians.
Jesus loved me even though I felt I was un- loveable. I realized that Jesus did not look at me the way I was, but the way I could be when He came to live within me. Jesus came into my heart, placed His love in my heart, cleansed and set me free from all my past sins. I became a new creation in Christ. When we become a new creation in Christ, our life will change differentially, dramatically and remarkably.
We must have a good self-image if we are going to love ourselves. The only good image we can have within us is the image of Christ. We may not like some of the things we do at times. However, if we focus on Christ who lives within us, we will be able to develop a good self-image. It is Christ who makes the difference in our hearts. Without Christ, we are nothing. In Christ Jesus, we are the righteousness of God. In Christ, we live and move and have our being. When we are born again we become one with Christ, and that part of ourselves we can love.
We will have a problem loving our self if we fail to love the person of Christ dwelling within us. Loving self as God loves us is actually unselfish. As Christians, Christ is now the head of our spiritual house and His love dwells richly within our hearts when we become dead to sin. Because Christ lives in us, we can have a better image of ourselves than we did in the past. We can forgive ourselves IF we fall short of the glory of God because the Blood of Christ washes away all our sins when we repent. We have joined with Christ in a partnership based on His love and forgiveness, not on our failures and shortcomings. We can love ourselves when we see Christ WITHIN us bearing the fruit of His righteousness.
We are crucified with Christ, nevertheless yet we live. Yet it is not we who live, but Christ who lives in us. The life we now live we live by the faith of Christ and our faith works by His love. God placed His love in our hearts when we accepted Christ as our Lord and Savior and became one with Him.
We can love our self with the God-kind of love because we are a product of His love. Because the love of Christ dwells within us, we can now love our neighbor as our self. The Golden Rule which commands us to “do unto others as we would have them do unto us” is energized by the love of Christ when He dwells richly within us.
If you love your neighbor as yourself, you will treat him as you treat yourself. If he is hungry, you will feed him. If he is thirsty, you will give him something to drink. If he needs clothing, you will give him clothing. I am not just speaking in the natural sense, but also spiritually. If our neighbor is spiritually hungry, we should tell him about “the Bread of Life.” If he needs spiritual clothing, we should offer him a “robe of righteousness.” If he is spiritually thirsty, we should offer him a drink of “Living Water.”
Loving yourself and loving your neighbor as you love yourself is not an option nor a suggestion, it is a COMMAND. If we were thirsty, we would find a large glass of cool water to drink. If we were naked, we would find something appropriate to cover our nakedness. If we were hungry, we would not neglect to eat a huge, hearty, healthy meal.
The Bible tells us not to think more highly (pride) of our self than we should. There needs to be a limit on how highly we think of ourselves. False humility will produce pride in us if we are not careful. A man was once given a medal at Church for being the humblest man in the congregation. The next Sunday he came to Church proudly wearing the medal on his chest for everyone to see.
When we think of ourselves in a positive way, it will give us a positive outlook on life. When we have confidence in who we are in Christ, we will be able to perform our divine duties as Christians properly and amiably. If we become puffed up with pride, we will be unable to portray humility and the righteousness of Christ before others.
I will praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are your work, and that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed, and in your book they were all written, the days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them. Psalm, 139, Verses 14-16
God knew us before He formed us in our mother’s wombs. He created and loves each one of us individually, and created each one of us to be unique. Our bodies are amazing instruments. Our minds have the ability to think, retain knowledge, learn, reason and understand. Each one of us will leave a different and unique footprint while walking here on this earth. Each one of us will leave a different fingerprint as we touch things here on earth. This is proof and a sign from God that He created each one of us as individuals to be unique.
The human body is made up of approximately one hundred trillion cells. It begins as one single fertilized cell in our mother’s womb and develops into what we physically become. Cells make up the different kinds of tissues, organs and systems which make the body complete. The DNA contained in the cells of every individual is unique to each person God created. We all may look somewhat similar on the outside, however, the DNA which cannot be seen by the naked eye makes us all different.
In the inner man where the Spirit of God dwells we as individuals are all unique. The spiritual DNA of every individual is different. God created each of us as individuals to be different and special to Him. He did not throw us on a spiritual assembly line and put the same personality in each one of us. He created us as individuals so He could love each of us individually. God loves the Church corporately, but He loves individuals personally.
If we do not have a personal relationship with Christ, we cannot have a corporate relationship with Him. A personal relationship with Christ leads us into a corporate relationship with Him. As a Christian, each one of us makes up the DNA of the body of Christ. We become HIS body as we are united together in His love. We are all one IN Him by the power of His Spirit. The Church becomes the fullness of Christ when we become joined and knit together by His love. (Ephesians, 4:14- 15).
With all the knowledge man possess regarding the human body, they know very little, if anything, about the soul and spirit of man. God has a vested interest in the people He created, but His greatest interest is in their souls and where they will spend eternity. God created man to be inhabited by His Spirit. Adam, the first man God created, became the first vessel He breathed His Spirit into.
Many people are more concerned about “how they look” on the outside rather than how they look and feel on the inside. Many embellish their bodies to look pleasant and attractive, but they neglect the most important thing--their spiritual DNA.
As Christians, we should be more concerned about what we look and feel like on the inside rather than how we look on the outside. The inner man is where the “true beauty” of holiness resides. We should not embellish the outer man and neglect to strengthen and empower the inner man with the virtues of Christ. If we neglect the inner man, we will be unable to accomplish anything in the Kingdom of God.
God loves every person He created. Although He does not like some of the things we do at times, He continues to loves us. Sometimes we may do things we should not do, but fortunately, through Christ, we have the ability to change if we choose to do so. We must realize the journey which we are on can and will from time to time be hindered by Satan and our enemies. We may fail to do the things we know we should do to please God while we are on this journey. However, we can be confident in knowing we are on the right track WHEN and IF we sincerely repent.
Repentance is the key to finding ourselves in right standing with God. If we fall short of the glory of God, we will have negative thoughts about ourselves. Negative thoughts will always lead us to be disappointed, discontent and depressed. When we become disappointed and discontent with ourselves we become depressed. We will take our focus off God and place it on ourselves in a negative manner.
Repentance will always lead us out of depression when and if we have fallen short of the glory of God. As long as we keep our focus on God, we will continue to walk in the fullness of Christ. Because Adam and Eve took their focus off the Tree of Life (Christ) in the Garden of Eden and ate of the forbidden fruit, they fell short of the glory of God.
Many people will try to look and/or act like someone they hold in high regard. Sometimes they try to mold and make themselves in the image of that person. I knew a Pastor who wanted to be just like Jimmy Swaggert. He preached like JIMMY, dressed like JIMMY, sang like Jimmy, and even combed his hair like JIMMY. However, no matter how much he tried to look and be like JIMMY, he was NO JIMMY SWAGGERT! We need to act and be who God created us to be, not who we desire to be like. We were created in the image of God, and we should desire to be like Him.
God created each one of us as individuals to be unique in Him. He could have created a church of spiritual robots, but He wanted vessels He could pour His Spirit and love into who would in turn fall in love with Him.
If we wish to re-invent ourselves to be like someone else, we should choose Christ as our example. We all need to be Christ-like. Jesus was successful at everything He did. We have been told if we want to be successful in life we must pattern our life after someone who has been successful. Jesus is the only one we should be trying to imitate. The only mold we should be trying to fit ourselves into is Christ.
Jesus is the Life, the Truth and the Way. In our heart of hearts, Jesus is the only one who can make a difference in our life. When we have been changed into the image of Christ, we will find the power we need to succeed in doing the works of Christ. We will then be successful at whatever we do for and in Him.
We must see ourselves as God sees us. We must accept ourselves as God accepts us, but realize there may be a need for us to change. We must do what we need to do to bring about the necessary changes in our hearts so Christ can be glorified IN us. If we care about what God thinks of us, we will seek and adhere to His knowledge and wisdom. If we desire to be CHANGED into the image of Christ so He can be glorified in us, we must earnestly seek to daily serve Him.
God cares for us and loves each one of us as individuals, but does not necessarily like what we do at times. However, being who we are is not as important as being “who we can be in Christ.” We must “press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians, 3:14). Knowledge shows us how we can become free from the “old man” and allow the Spirit of Christ, the “new man,” to dwell within us richly. We must “rebel against rebellion” today and ask God to impart the divine nature of Christ in our hearts so we can be about our Father’s business.
LOVE DOES NO HARM TO A NEIGHBOR; THEREFORE LOVE IS THE FULFILLING OF THE LAW. Romans, Chapter 13, Verse 10.