There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out
fear.1Jhn 4.18.
‘Fear’, especially if rooted in rejection, will always lessen after encountering the ‘perfect love’ of God, the love valuing us for who we are and not for what we can achieve. ‘Agape love’
heals the roots of rejection and cannot but be therapeutic. Make sure you don't miss out on receiving its healing power—either directly from the Lord or via His surrogates.
BARRIERS TO LOVE
What I have written above, many know to be true but are unable to receive this powerful antidote to ‘fear’. Barriers block the very thing they need, no doubt a source of frustration to them, to heaven, and to those wanting to share the love of God with them. Uncovering the reason for such an impasse should be a priority, so here is one clue. The blockage with many is from the ‘fear’ itself, most likely the fear of rejection; a dynamic in play similar to the reticence about seeing a doctor in case of an adverse diagnosis. But any apprehension about having God’s love touch us is unwarranted. Any ‘fear’ that He will reject us (even a hint of it) is a lie from the pit of hell and a tragedy when it denies His love.
Of course, many see their ‘fear’ as a defense against further hurt, some possibly welcoming or even closely guarding it. They resist its removal because of the security it affords—though at the same time wanting to be free from it. This is unfortunate, as 83
a defense mechanism such as this easily becomes reinforced so the barrier is almost impossible to overcome. Most often strengthened by taking on a false persona (often eccentric), for others, by embracing an antisocial lifestyle. Both unhelpful outcomes when others want to show them the love of God, especially when they have fears of their own. Never see defensive walls as friends, they only increase the ‘fear’ already about rejection, failure, and hurt.
DON’T HIDE YOURSELF
The obvious plan of action for those rejected and fearful of further hurt is to stop ‘hiding’—both from God and humans who can share this ‘agape’ love. Notice, I included others besides God because the wounded often look only to heaven for help.
Sure, to directly encounter divine love is far more satisfying, but humans love us in ways God won’t. It is why heaven provides us with a circle of ‘significant others’ and to hide from these
‘angels of mercy’ (your nuclear or extended family) who love and accept you when others don’t or can’t is more than counterproductive.
Then there are friends, neighbors, and fellow believers who also can touch us with love of the ‘agape kind’. In fact, isolating from these conduits of healing does them a disservice as well as ourselves. Now, your fear of rejection may be mild and you do socialize, but probably only in a very limited way; the interaction is brief and superficial, never going beyond what is safe or comfortable. But this is not the deep ‘fellowship’ every child of God is meant to enjoy, so refuse a lifestyle of seclusion—it only works against your freedom.
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Now, if the truth is told, it usually requires more than a superficial encounter with God’s love (directly or through fellow humans). To heal past hurt and disappointment. Not a comforting thought, but often true. However, even if divine love only touches us in some small way, it still should be welcomed.
Such as when some ‘angel of mercy’ (human) reaches out to listen or befriend in some way—perhaps with financial aid or other help. Even though limited, such an expression of ‘agape’
love can renew trust in human kindness, and slowly but surely lessen ‘fear’ about betrayal and rejection. Offering, eventually, even greater freedom to receive more ‘loving’.
Those who resonate with the scenario just described have, therefore, the choice of either continuing to hide behind the walls of ‘fear’ and dysfunction or taking steps to dismantle them. Yes, a painful process (change always is), especially if retreating to safety has been the preferred defense tactic over many years. A process often accompanied by despair at the slow rate of change (even after much crying out to the Lord for help).
Fret not; once the decision is made to allow others near, it is more a matter from then on of asking for divine help not to reject this love when shown. Now, I realize it requires courage to take these steps, but, when earnestly sought, God loves to help with a generous supply of grace even for this. (See Heb 4.16)
The solutions advocated so far may be insufficient for some attempting to break down these barriers. Any changes have met with strong internal resistance, and if so, such a ‘standoff’
means other factors must first be addressed. And with a deeply 85
wounded psyche, the most likely ones are resentment and unforgiveness. But if there is both severe trauma and stubborn resistance it also indicates the likelihood of reinforcement by a stronghold of demonic forces. Without ministry to deal with these dark spirits it will be difficult to receive love and healing.
EXPERIENCING THE LOVE OF GOD
‘Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit.’ (Rom. 5.5)
Fellow humans reaching out in love can minister a level of healing to those bruised by rejection, but not to the same extent as encountering this divine love directly. One touch by the Spirit of God Himself can dispel deep, lifelong ‘fears’ stemming from rejection, and to experience this should be the earnest wish of everyone with this ‘fear’. Yet many lack the desire, their
‘shutters’ are up. Please, never do this whatever the reason; always be open to having heaven’s love touch you when manifested in the divine presence. That is, when this ‘anointing’
of love is tangibly present either in a meeting of believers or in a time of private devotion. When palpable, your own spirit will register it is from the Lord and, with delight, will relish it.
I reiterate, to have only an intellectual understanding of God’s love is not enough. The struggle to believe He cares about you and freedom from ‘fear’ often only stops after this special anointing of love has engulfed. Don’t be satisfied, then, with the blessings every believer enjoys—good health, shelter, food, employment, etc. Look to encounter God’s love in this unique way I have described, for, like many others, your need demands 86
more than just the ‘mercy drops’ heaven sends. (More on this later.)
GOD'S FORGIVENESS
‘Beloved, if our heart condemns us not, then have we confidence toward God.’ (1John 3.21) It may seem elementary to write about a conscience free of all guilt, but many don’t enjoy this blessing every believer in Christ is promised. But without a clear conscience, defeating ‘fear’ becomes nigh impossible. The fearful must know beyond any doubt all sin is forgiven. Yes, this is basic Christianity, but an important start to experiencing the love of God. For heaven’s pardon not only frees from the stain of sin, it restores us back to full fellowship with God—healing all sense of alienation. And who can doubt alienation and unresolved guilt are major factors in ‘fear’—they were for Adam and Eve (Gen 3.10). A conscience as ‘white as snow’ (Is 1.18) is undoubtedly one of the greatest blessings in this life and as preparation for the next. Being confident of God’s acceptance and the freedom to boldly present requests certainly addresses any fear of judgment. ( Heb 4.16) It also means a genuine rest of soul along with greater peace about relating to strangers, even those who don't like or can't accept us. Those benefits along with the courage to cope with the vagaries of life all come from knowing it is ‘well with our soul’.
David certainly exulted over divine forgiveness (See Ps 32); in part, rejoicing surely in greater freedom from any fear of punishment, fear of damnation, fear of failure, or even the fear of rejection. Unresolved guilt, on the other hand, makes us vulnerable to these fears, along with an often-unrecognized lack 87
of ‘nerve’—‘fear’ manifest in timidity. If unsure of why you suffer from debilitating deep shyness and reserve, ask the Lord to reveal if this is in play; showing you directly or to a counselor with prophetic insight. Any who desire a ‘force field’ so ‘fear’
cannot constantly disturb must make sure to secure forgiveness for every past sin.
Out of sublime love, and through the atonement of the Cross, the Godhead met the full cost for cleansing of sin. The worst to the least sinner safe in Christ has the promise their sins will be
‘ remembered no more’ (Heb 8.12). (Notice, it does not say that God throws our sins into a ‘sea of forgetfulness’. No, He is not senile, unable to remember, just the very opposite.) Yes, the soul stained by the vilest sin can be as pure as the driven snow. (See Isa 1.18) Hallelujah! With this promise of a pure conscience, it means no one need suffer the torment of a fear of death or fear of eternal punishment. As long as there is a commitment to obey the commandments of the new covenant, a believer is entitled to an unshakeable confidence about their eternal security, including total peace about future judgment. I trust you enjoy these blessings. Some reading this book will not, the guilt and lack of peace stubbornly remain (even after seeking heaven’s forgiveness many times). If this is you, please read the following as it could be the key to finding the peace you need to stop fear’s harassment.
Now, some will stoically tolerate a ‘niggling conscience’, possibly believing they must expect to live with a degree of guilt, especially if their sin was serious. So they use distractions, drugs, or medications to dull its voice. No, no, no! A believer in 88
Christ does not have to endure the slightest torment over past sins (minor or major). Since the Cross of Calvary, there is no valid reason to put up with it; all are entitled to what the hymnist called ‘perfect peace and rest’. If guilt still ‘bites at your heels’—no matter how small an irritant—deal with it once and for all. Here are extra steps to do this.
All some need to do is stand in faith and refuse to accept what is none other than condemnation from the ‘enemy’. The unwelcome harassment can be stopped with a strong rebuke and by claiming the efficacy of the 'blood of Christ'. Otherwise, the bogus guilt and shame will continue to haunt them. Now, this may not be enough for others because their nagging guilt is inherited, passed down from forbears who committed abominable sins. Sometimes the sins are known, but if not, prophetic ministry will often reveal it as well as help with special prayer to break the ancestral guilt.
However, even these steps will not resolve guilt if the conditions (all of them) for a divine pardon have not been fulfilled. Even if millions believe the myth, asking for forgiveness is not the only requirement for the cleansing of guilt.
While heaven’s pardon is granted because of grace, this doesn’t negate the requirement to fulfill other conditions, the 'terms’
believers sign onto in the new covenant. (Now, complying with these doesn’t earn heaven’s forgiveness, it merely qualifies us to receive His mercy.) One important condition is to repent of the sin(s) we seek forgiveness for. (See Acts 2.38, Luke 17.3,4). If this is not observed, niggling guilt and ‘fear’ are free to tag along. No matter what the sin is, it requires repentance on some 89
level; with minor sins, a lesser change of heart, while serious sin demands serious repentance. What does it mean, then, to repent?
The following paragraphs address this, and though it might seem elementary, please don’t skip it. This could be the pathway to your freedom.
REPENTANCE
Repentance demands two initial responses from us—
confession of the sin and recognition of its sinfulness. At first glance, seemingly simple stipulations, but steps many believers still trip over. And, number one, is to not make a totally honest confession. To reduce or misrepresent what is confessed must sabotage the cleansing when God only forgives what is owned up to. For the complete purging of guilt, there can be no downplaying the sin, shifting blame, or using excuses to reduce culpability.
Number two, both the sin’s true nature and our blameworthiness must be acknowledged. Minimizing its vileness or extent is unacceptable. For instance, adultery, fornication, homosexuality, etc. are not ‘mistakes’ but gross immoral sins (even abominations) and must be confessed as such. Some sins (not all) are even serious enough to warrant confession to someone who can confirm the absolution by heaven ( James 5.15,16). Protestants rarely do this but it is a biblical model for dealing with persistent guilt. (To be clear, this is not the ‘Roman Catholic’ rite.)
Of course, with a fear of punishment, a full confession becomes very difficult. It becomes much harder to believe there 90
is cleansing by fully ‘fessing up’. A problem especially for any (often the proud) who refuse to believe they are constituted ‘a sinner’ (Rom 5.19) or who cannot acknowledge they sin because in them there ‘dwells no good thing’ (Rom 7.18). In fact, when the proud insist on keeping their ego intact, they will especially struggle to fully admit to sin; yet mandatory if they desire a conscience free from all guilt.
The next step in repentance is to grieve over what is an affront to God’s honor—having remorse for sin is the least we can do. This means serious sin demands serious mourning, something James confirms by saying sinners are to ‘ Lament and mourn and weep! Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom’ (Jam 4.9). This willingness to mourn sin certainly qualifies for the promise of a special blessing (See Matt 5.4). Non-other than the favor of heaven because in mourning their sin, it plows up the ‘fallow (hardened) ground' of the heart so seeds of disgust and hatred for sin are sown.
Changing the heart in ways other acts of contrition can’t.
The next step (most focus on this) is asking God for forgiveness. But this too needs to be done right if guilt is not to linger. Any request for heaven’s pardon must be based solely on Christ’s atoning blood, not because of any ‘works of righteousness’; ‘dead works’ are as ‘ filthy rags’ (Is 64.6) in God’s sight and can never justify. Heaven’s forgiveness is based on mercy and the blood of Christ and to commend ourselves any other way is futile.
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For a full cleansing of their conscience, some troubled by guilt have another step—they are required to make restitution. If their sin is against another, the minimum is an honest apology and request for forgiveness (Matt 5.23, 24). Or the required restitution could be much greater—the return of stolen goods, the repair of damaged property, or some other remedy. In this step, the important principle to follow is being willing to make restitution even if it is not required. Thankfully, we need not wonder about this as God convicts when it is necessary. The bottom line: if condemnation lingers as a problem, make sure to cover all these bases, even ruthless in remedying any deficiency—you will not regret it.
ACCEPTANCE WITH GOD
‘For you did NOT receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, “Abba, Father.” The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs.’
(Rom 8.15-17) An important outcome of a pure conscience is knowing beyond any doubt we are a loved child of God, one accepted by Him—a blessing to be treasured. But to enjoy real freedom from ‘fear’, this has to be more than a doctrine. This confidence to stand unashamed before God assured He will not reject us, needs to be experienced at a deep level. Those wanting real freedom from anxiety about being ignored or dismissed from God’s presence must enjoy a reverential familiarity with Him as the text above alludes to. And it tells us, every believer has the right to call the Sovereign Ruler of the universe, ‘Dad’
(‘ Abba’ is Aramaic for Dad).
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Do you dwell in this ‘land of rest’ a child of God is to enjoy?
Sadly, many don’t after accepting the devil’s lie they are unworthy of it; they live still as a ‘slave’ in God’s house, not as a free ‘son’ or ‘daughter’. Don’t give the devil that satisfaction!
If God is your ‘Abba, Father’, you have the same rights every child of His has and this includes the authority to war against
‘fear’ and the right to demand it leave you alone. That, along with the power to enforce it.
AN ANOINTING OF LOVE
The false constructs created in the mind by ‘fear’ can crumble before the quickened ‘Word of God’. But this efficacy of Scripture to destroy ‘imaginations’ (2Cor 10.5) may not be enough for those with a stronghold of fear. Their need is to encounter what I have mentioned already, an ‘anointing of divine love’; where it is tangibly felt and likened to being wrapped around with the ‘arms’ of God. But how it is described matters not, what is important is the unusual comfort it brings to dispel lingering unbelief and giving fresh insulation from the chilling winds of fear. When sovereignly granted in a gathering or in private devotions, or by through the laying on of hands, the fearful should not hang back. When manifest, it is not the time for them to be passive or reticent, but sensitive and ready to fling open the doors to savor this unusual anointing. It first happened to me soon after my conversion when I was much discouraged, and the encounter made all the difference in overcoming my low spirits. It can do the same for you.
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