HEATHER
Solana has finally slept. After putting her in her crib, I walk back to the living room where the three ladies are having a serious discussion. Hannah and Judith have their heads bowed towards Celine who is saying something in hushed tones. After a while of listening in silence they both jump out of their seats yelling something incomprehensible.
‘Hey keep it down, the girl is sleeping.’ I whisper-yell at them
The three freeze a little before whispering sorrys’.
‘How can you start calling your daughter the girl already?’ comes from Celine, ‘it’s only been four months she’s still a princess.’
I sit next to Judith and grab one of the wedding pamphlets, ‘what do you know!’ I mumble.
Celine rolls her eyes, ‘you have so much to complain about after having so many people who would like to babysit for you.’
They just don’t get it.
‘Babysit? I’m afraid of what my girl would become? Half of you people supersede me when it comes to new mothers anxiety.’
‘She’s the first baby in the family for years.’ Celine says, ‘bear with them.’
‘There will be another one soon.’ Hannah quips, Judith starts while Celine and I raise an eyebrow at her. There is still a huge controversy with Julian and Hannah being together, did they decide to take the baby route?
‘Oh.’ Hannah presses her lips together, ‘I thought everyone knew already.’ She mumbles, glancing at Judith.
Judith places her face in her hands groaning something I decode as her promising to murder Hannah when this is all over.
‘What is going on?’ I ask all three ladies.
‘Yes what’s going on?’
Hannah seals her mouth shut so we both turn to Judith for an explanation and I am positive Celine and I have the same thought in our heads that is somewhere along the lines of- what the hell?-
Judith raises her palms in a surrender form, ‘look my parents gave us a hard time.’
‘Understandable.’ I nod
‘The last thing I need is for my family to be involved in this.’ Judith looks at me, because that had been my first worry when she got all mixed up with Lawyer, ‘Lawyer thought it would be a good excuse for the sudden rush of our relationship.’
‘So you decided telling them that he knocked you up would do it?’ Celine raises an eyebrow at her, ‘just like that.’
‘In my family, it’s the right thing to do. Once a man makes a woman pregnant he has to marry her no matter what.’
‘So was it planned or--.’
‘It’s not true.’ Judith interrupts Celine, ‘the bastard has been holding on to the story all this time it’s driving me crazy.’
‘I don’t get what your deal is?’ Hannah raises her face to the ceiling like she has had this conversation a hundred times without a breakthrough, ‘you are getting married anyway at the end of the day, make it true to keep your family out of this—they already think you are four months along.’
‘What?’ Celine and I chorus at the same time in shock.
Judith raises her palms again, ‘I know I’m in deep crap, wipe that look off your faces.’
Hannah doesn’t let the issue go, ‘well I’m worried about you Judith—you know that once you become a part of this family there is no turning back—you seem like you are withholding something because you really are not ready to be a part of it fully.’
Judith shakes her head, ‘Hannah, this isn’t about me changing my mind, we are getting married at the end of the week,’
‘So what? Heather and Taylor were married but the possibilities of their separation was very high until Solana came into the picture. You know that if you have Lawyer’s child now there is no turning back… and I still think you haven’t made up your mind.’
A silence descends in the living room and all eyes are on Judith because Hannah’s statement makes sense. Judith doesn’t meet our eyes as she suddenly stands, grabs her bag and marches out of the living room.
I stand to go after her at the same time raising a palm at the two ladies to let me go alone.
I find her just outside the door with er back leaned against the wall.
‘She’s right.’ Judith says as soon as I join her but she doesn’t look at me.
‘Judith--.’
She shakes her head, stopping me, ‘this was all exciting at first—I was rebelling and here was Lawyer on a silver platter to help me do it—I really didn’t think much about how much I was getting into until that crazy man dragged us to that house for Christmas.’
I sigh, ‘Judith-.’
She turns to me, eyes teary, ‘no you were right—you were right at the first time Heather—I just didn’t get why you were so eager to keep me away from all this, I thought you were using my family to guilt me away from all of it… ‘
‘Judith stop.’ I hold her shoulders, ‘you can’t do this right now.’ I shake her a little because she needs to understand, ‘this is not the time to list I should haves okay? You need to focus on keeping the people you care about out of this. I know it’s scary, I am still scared till now myself.’
She gives me a skeptical look, ‘scared of what? You have been accepted into the family, even the clan recognizes you now—you are no longer in danger but under their protection instead.’
She doesn’t know. She doesn’t know of the pact I signed with Mr. Abiwu to get to where we are today. Even Taylor doesn’t know. Solana will never know. This secret is always bearing down on me day and night—but of course I can’t tell her that. Mr. Abiwu is still and will always be a raving lunatic—but at least he can stick to a deal. If I go against our agreement, I or Solana will be killed. Maybe I was naïve to believe his threat. But I won’t play around with a man who killed my father and sought to destroy my entire family. Now my friend, who I care about, is in his web, and the only advice I can give her is to stay because I cannot summon enough courage to ask her to run. I too am trapped in this life and system without remedy.
‘I can’t tie myself forever to him Heather—it was a momentary thing and now I can’t back out.’
Her words shock me.
‘Judith!’
She shakes her head, ‘I’m not sure if I love him or it was infatuation—I don’t know.’
‘Judith—you need to stick to what brought you all the way here and now.’
She just looks at me. And right there I see all the doubt and fear in my friend’s eyes. I have a vague futuristic picture of a raged lunatic and havoc as well.
‘I—I need to go home,’ she inhales, ‘to clear my head.’
I tighten my grip, ‘Judith—you wedding is on this Saturday—what are you going to do at home?’
She sighs, ‘I need to talk to someone—I know you mean well Heather but you didn’t have a choice—you were born into this—you were never going to escape it even if you had met Taylor or not.’
My hands fall from her arms and I step back as though she has just slapped me.
‘I’m sorry.’ She reaches for and I take another step back, ‘Heather--.’
‘you are right—I wouldn’t understand—I was not given a choice by my family—they wouldn’t protect me but deliver me to the lion’s den, I wouldn’t know exactly what to tell you in your struggle.’
Tears fall down her cheeks, ‘Heather I didn’t mean…’
‘I hope you make the choice that makes you happy Judith.’
I turn back into the house and close the door. And there is that moment, where dark memories flash slide by slide in my mind. I lean my head against the door. I am suddenly tired.
JUDITH
I am hiding in my room, no my sister’s room watching runaway bride for the tenth time. I am still in the clothes I came with two nights ago and at this point I think I am going insane.
Its Thursday, a day left to my wedding. Tomorrow is the bachelorette party Celine planned, tonight is the family dinner. Ten times I have watched the damn movie and there is still no light bulb idea of how I can run away from my own wedding. Yeah I’m crazy.
I remember the look on Lala’s face when I told her my plan. Or rather, I told Lala everything. In between my conversation with Heather—which went completely wrong—and my anxiety about the wedding—and my fears of the future I showed up at my sister’s college apartment and just spilled my guts like a drunkard. It was the next morning that I finally sobered up to understand the danger I put her in for telling her the truth.
But on a more positive note, Lala was shocked enough for the rest of my family I guess.
‘I won’t tell mom and dad such madness.’ Lala had said wide-eyed, ‘it would kill them.’
‘Forget I told you anything.’
‘No, if you want out of this, we will figure it out, no need to panic.’
Yeah right she was panicking enough for the both of us
‘Out of all the men you could have gone nuts for it had to be a high class criminal and now you have Stockholm syndrome.’
‘I know right.’
‘We could leave the country.’ Lala suggested.
I had laughed, laughed so hard she had to check the laptop if I wasn’t watching a comedy or something.
‘If only it was that simple.’
‘What on earth have you gotten yourself into? I thought the man was an ordinary thug who has the brains and can dress well but this?’
‘Lala you are not helping.’
‘Help? I don’t know anything else I can do to help you at this point other than hitting the road.’
‘Yeah me too—but I wouldn’t make it to the airport before I have to face Lawyer and explain to him exactly where I am going and why.’
‘Not if you vanish for a while or you don’t show up at the wedding.’
‘And where will I hide?’
For the first time I saw an evil smile form on my sister’s face. So that is how I ended up here in this room that is a friend of a friend, friend’s room, still in the same clothes.
So now it’s almost evening and I can’t help but wonder what’s going to go down during the family dinner when I don’t show up. The uncles will make fun of it of course.
A rap at the door snaps me out of my futuristic disaster thoughts. I blink into the dim room, because I was afraid to open the curtain, afraid to let the sun in like I was a damned vampire who couldn’t stand the sunlight.
The knock is persistent and annoying as I scowl at the door. I don’t recall Lala saying that she would come check on me though I just spoke to her a few minutes ago. I pick up my phone and open whatsapp, she is not online--, I am pressing dial on her number when the knocker speaks,
‘Judith open the damn door.’
My phone drops on the floor and the crashing down of a cracking screen doesn’t even make me wince as I stare at the door. I was expecting that. Of course I was expecting him to find me. What I wasn’t expecting is me still being shocked by it. I knew he knows my entire network, there is nowhere to hide. Best way to deal with Lawyer is to come forward clean and transparent and try to dodge the consequences.
Why didn’t I think of this before I got myself stuck in this predicament?
‘Judith!’ a little harsher this time.
I heave a long sigh before I start for the door, ignoring my damaged phone on the floor. Without a pause or a blink I turn the door handle and pull it open. Ready to face this and – three days, just three days I had already forgotten how much his looks vex me. He’s dressed up too. The family dinner, right
That’s why he’s probably here because there is no way in hell he is going to watch a disaster take place. Mr. Abiwu is unforgiving as he is unreasonable. If we don’t get married I am a liability to the family and risk exposing them. I will have to be gotten rid of.
‘We have fifteen minutes to talk before you get dressed and we go to the family dinner.’ H says walking past me into the room as if he owns the place.
That confirms he knew I was here all along. Was he giving me space to think? I close the door and turn to the room. He is already seated himself on a comfy looking chair I had pushed against the window last night as a trap to alert me of any intruders. Yeah I had actually pictured a person crawling through the window to murder me in my sleep.
I stand with a confidence I don’t feel, ‘we don’t have much to talk about.’
‘uh no that’s where you are wrong—we are going to end this thing right now—I gave you two days to yourself without hovering over you—I am sure you have made up your mind about what you really want—about us and your family—you need to tell me exactly where you stand.’
I hug myself, because I am losing my stand here and this is not a time to back down.
Might as well get this over with, that’s what my brain may have decided because before I know it words are pouring out of me like water from a tap opened by a toddler.
I feel like I am not ready for all this, frankly I don’t want the wedding, I may secretly want my life to return to the way it was. I am plagued with guilt every waking hour for all the lies I am diving into since the first lie started. I do love him (I think) but marriage?—okay I am scared. It’s like I just suddenly arrived here and by the time I opened my eyes I am here.
And saying all this is kind of weird because the man is just looking at me expressionlessly. No reaction, no wince even though at some point I explicitly explain how horrendously insane his entire family is and I quite frankly don’t want to be a part of it. And I emphasize the point where by I do not want my family involved in all this—just because I somehow met him doesn’t mean everyone in my lifetime suffers for it.
‘Say something.’ I whisper when his expressionless demeanor start to creep me out and his unfazed stance makes fear roll in my gut like hardened icicles.
He stands and I roll on my heels to avoid taking a step back.
‘I know,’ is all he says eyes steady on me, ‘I was waiting for you to say it.’
I actually take a step back, ‘then why?-.’
‘This is serious to me—I am not playing games.’
I scoff, ‘you think I am playing games?’
‘You are.’
I scoff again, ‘you don’t know-.’
‘I know enough—you still can’t let church boy go Judith—you think you owe him something because he is your childhood friend—I am willing to understand that,’ he walks towards me until he is right into my face, and me? picture a frozen face when you pause a movie whereby the actor is stunned speechless, ‘so here is what is going to happen—we are going to the wedding dinner tonight, for the record none of this happened, we were together the whole week—after the dinner you are going to have your party Friday night,’ he palms my cheek, ‘and on Saturday I will meet you at the altar, and we will be married. It may take you hours, days, months or even years to come to really understand what we have—but you will be with me when that happens.’