CHAPTER 09
I had to park the car about five hundred meters away from his room due to lack of parking and when I came near the dancing it was three minutes past six and Shane was waiting. When he saw me I noticed his look in the eyes change and his mouth opened half way but it was only for about a second. I kissed his cheeks and we entered the building in front of us. After opening the door he put the light on and I kept the bottle of vine on the table.
I can get the smell of the food in the kitchen. I thought it is very spicy because the aroma I got was strong.
“So today is your last day here in Germany. Did you do your study course well?”
“I think it was successful. It was a study about the German government formalities on freight. I managed to obtain all the details I needed. When I get back, I have to write a thesis on that.”
“As you are attached to freight formalities you must be knowing Harris Cargo in NY?”
“Of course I know them. They are a very successful company. A lot of their ships are sailing in every ocean. Sailing to all known ports of the whole world.”
“But do you know their workers are very unhappy with what they get?”
This conversation is going to ruin my evening so it is better to change the subject.
“I think sooner or later they will realize that. By the way what have you cooked for us today?”
I asked him....
“It’s rice and curry. In Sri-Lanka we eat rice for morning, noon and night. I would call it our national meal. Go and have a look!”
It was a meal for two. Shane had cooked rice, a chicken curry and a Dahl curry.
“It really looks nice and the smell is very pleasing and I am getting hungry also.”
We laughed.... Then I took out the bottle of vine from the bag and opened it. There were no vine glasses in the room but he had two normal glasses as it was OK.
“Normally I don’t drink alcohol Sera. Never when I work. But it’s alright as today is my day off and as I know my limits.”
So we said cheers and started drinking.
I have some questions to ask him but I was thinking how to start the topic. Then I saw what I was searching.... There was a big book on his bedside table and I decided it to be his Bible.
“This is what your mother sent to you?”
I asked him.
“No Sera this one I got from Susie and Rolf as a present when I left the job. It is the most authentic version of all English bibles; it is the King James authorized Version with all the study out lines.”
“You mean to say this one and the one that mother sent you are different?”
“Oh! no!..It’s the same. Apart from God’s message this has more details like Historical back ground of the Bible, latest archaeological finds, the land maps of the early days, a good study guide, a good concordance, Hebrew and Greek dictionary and many more. There is nothing added to God’s word but you get more details so for a person who is studying the word it would be easy.”
"But Shane there are certain things which I don’t understand about your God.. Are you in a position to answer some of my questions?”
“I think with God’s guidance I can do that if you ask one question at a time. Otherwise at the end of our conversation we will find a lot of questions and answers which we will remember none.”
“Ok.. my first question is this. In your story, you said you helped Susie and Rolf to come to the knowledge of God and after they started believing everything was fine for them and they prospered in everything they did in their lives..
My question is ... you knew God before them but you are not as well off as them in life. You don’t have a house, you have not seen your mother for a long time, you don’t have a girl friend or a wife, and you don’t have money because as soon as you go out of work you have to live on your savings. More than anything else, after you stopped what you were doing with Susie and got over lust, you are in an even more testing surroundings. If God is love, If God loves you, why is he doing this to you. I think your God is unreasonable. He should give more relief to you than Susie and Rolf. What is your answer?”
“Alright Sera I will try my best with a small example from the Bible itself. There is a book in the Old Testament in the Bible called “Job”. The name for this book came from the man who was involved in it. His name was Job. Now Job was a God fearing man and hated evil. Because of his holiness God rewarded him abundantly. He was a very rich man with God’s blessings.
One day Satan went to see God and God asked him where was he. Then Satan said he was visiting the earth. Then God asked him whether he noticed His servant Job’s faith. Now you should know that Satan hates anybody who loves God. He will try his best to destroy that person. Then Satan said to God;
“Just because you have given everything to him, he is faithful to you... try and take them off from him, he will curse you.”
Then God gave authority to Satan to take away everything Job had. God was sure of Job’s faithfulness. So Satan took away all his wealth and the most precious of them all, his seven sons and the three daughters in one day. But Job never cursed God. He thought if he can trust and worship God when He was enjoying all the good things in his life, he should trust him when God takes away everything also and worship and thank God the same way. And he was trusting and praising God.
Then Satan again went in front of God one day and God asked him where he was. Then Satan said that he was travelling on the earth. Then God asked him whether he noticed the faithfulness of Job. Then Satan said the day Job loses his purpose to live he will curse God for that. Then God again gave authority to Satan to harm his body anyway he likes but to spare his life.
Then Satan went out from the presence of the Lord, and smote Job with sore boils from the sole of his foot to the crown of his head. But Job never cursed his God for that and he was still trusting the Lord and praising Him.
In this particular incident Satan lost the battle to Job. Beyond doubt Job proved that his faith in God couldn’t be changed by evil or earthly riches.
God once again restored his wealth in double and gave him seven sons and three daughters. When I read this story in the Bible I knew why I am living a life like this. Satan is trying his best to make me go away from my God. But he will never succeed. I have lived with a lot of testing and temptations for four years as a winner and when the testing is over and when Satan is defeated, God will restore my life to a better standard.”
“Is my answer satisfactory Sera?”
“I would say that you were very convincing but as I am not very familiar with biblical quotations I think I should read that passage one day and see for myself.”
“A person who has a good knowledge of the Bible will be sure to believe it. As you are not very familiar with the Bible it is a bit difficult for me to give you the answer where you will believe it at once, and I don’t expect you to believe at once. If you want to know more about God or God’s word, if you want to check whether the Bible is the true word of God, first you must read it. Then you can believe in God or discard God. God is love. When you have God’s love in you, you don’t do so many things that you do normally in day to day life as He who is inside you will give you the warning before you do it.”
His answer was good but I am not interested. There is only one thing in my mind. If I can have him at least today. After two glasses of vine Shane said it’s enough for him. I was feeling good and thought of finishing the bottle. I know that I can stand. At about nine O’clock he went to the small kitchen to warm up the food. He closed the glass door to the kitchen saying the scent of food will come to his cloths. I was sitting on his bed and looking around the room when I saw an air-mail envelop under his Bible. I took it to my hand. I was not scared of Shane even if he opens the door, before opening the door I will see him. I quickly got the letter out from the envelope and started reading it.
31st March 1991
Kandy.
My darling Son,
Received your letter of 21/3 and from the bank I got the receipt informing me of the money remitted to my account. In a few days time you will be twenty-six and I pray at least this year God will find you a suitable wife. Whenever I pray, I ask God to let me see a grandchild of mine before He calls me home and I am sure that God will never disappoint me.
More than anything else I long to see you. Though you send photos from time to time I know that you should be more handsome than that. Your father was a very handsome man. I don’t know why God took him away so early in life. Though he was not very religious I know he believed in God.
This year my wish for your birthday is that you will get a good wife from God. Shall write to you soon. May Almighty God bless you and keep you happy in everything you do.
Love,
Amma.
I put the letter away fast. The letter sounds sad. I can’t understand why God making her sad. I thought for a moment whether I could live without seeing Papa for six years. It’s impossible. He doesn’t travel too much now and he is always at the head office. Every day before five in the evening he goes home. Our home in New York is a two storied building with a solid right around wall. It has got twenty rooms. On my request he made my room with another two rooms to look like an apartment. You name it..... I have it in that apartment.
Martha’s room was next to my apartment and I had a push button to call her whenever I want her. Other than my bedroom the other two rooms are empty.
“Shall we eat Sera? The food is ready.”
“Ok Shane lets taste the Sri-Lankan food.”
“Sera!.. I like to pray before we eat. Is it Ok?”
“Sure go ahead.”
I said. Then he started praying.
“Dear Abba Father in heaven, I praise and thank you for this day and for this meal which is set upon to be consumed by Sera and me. When there are millions of people who are starving in this world at this moment you have provided us with a descent meal and let this be for your glory. Let this food, when it goes inside our bodies do let us know more of you. I pray in the never failing name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth. Amen!”
Though the food was a little hot for me it was extremely tasty. After a long time I managed to eat well.
“You are a good cook Shane: do you know that?”
“Thanks to Susie: I got the training from her. Later when I started cooking I introduced the spices to her and the people came to eat at the guesthouse used to say the food is really good. She taught me how to cook and I made it better.”
After we finished eating he made some coffee and we were talking. I can’t remember what we were talking about but we spoke a lot.
At about ten thirty in the night suddenly it started to rain. It was so heavy and windy. We waited until about ten forty five but the rain is not going to cease. It was becoming worse every moment. I know Sholcky and Logus will wait until eleven only. Then they will go back home. I parked the car about five hundred meters away and there is no way of going to the car. Finally at about eleven thirty Shane suggested that I should sleep in his room. I was more than happy. So I said OK.
He cleared the other bed and asked for me to sleep there. He gave me one of his cotton jogging suits to wear and I went to the toilette and changed myself. I kept my pantyhose on thinking that if I get wet he will get to know about it. When he came out of the toilette after changing I was surprised to see him wearing only a piece of cloth around his waist.
“You go to sleep like that?”
“Yes Sera it is very comfortable and I am not used to cover myself also and that is why I am using a room heater to keep the room warm. He had a beautiful chest. Beautiful muscular arms. I wished he would hold me in his arms. I asked him to keep the kitchen light on saying that I am not used to darkness. But the truth is I want to see him sleeping. I felt his scent on what I was wearing and felt my nipples standing. So we wished good night to each other and went to sleep.
In five minutes he was sleeping like a baby. I just can’t believe it. A man having a woman ever ready to satisfy him falling into deep sleep in five minutes? I was wondering whether this is real. I don’t know for how long I was watching him sleeping. He tossed on the bed for about two or three times but on the fourth time the thin cloth he was wearing came apart giving me a perfect view of his manhood. It’s about five inches long and thick. I felt my whole body shiver. I put my right fist under the pantyhose and I had to jerk my back only once.....I came. I bit the pillow hard to silent a possible loud cry.
I felt good. I just can’t understand this man. I didn’t know a woman could come by looking at a man’s flaccid penis. This man is somebody special. I am glad that I stayed back without going home.
I didn’t know how long I have been sleeping. When I woke up I looked at my wristwatch and found that it was five forty five in the morning. When I looked at Shane my heart stopped. He had a full erection. It was more than eight inches or may be nine and thick.... and it was throbbing. I have never seen a thing like that before. Yes only in blue movies. The head of it was shining even in that little light. For a moment I thought that I have no room to take that in. It was huge and thick as ever. My fist automatically went under my panty. I didn’t have to jerk my back this time. I came. By being with a man, I can’t remember coming twice. It happened only once before and that is also when I was using my toys. After that second come I felt shit.
But this day I feel so different. Even now, I want to have him. I know that I will never be able to forget this man. I will remember him until the day I die.
“Sera...drink your coffee.”
He was holding a cup of coffee and asking me to wake up.
“It's seven fifteen Sera if you don't get up you will miss the flight.”
I want to tell him that I don’t want to leave him and go. I want him so badly but in a few hours time I will be far away from him. I slowly got up and started drinking my coffee thanking Shane. I felt the back of my trouser is wet.
“Shane will you give me this jogging suit?”
“Why Sera it, is a very old one.”
“I like it.. can I have it?”
“Well if you like it you can have it.”
“I will send you a new one when I get back.”
I told him.
“You don't have to do that if you like it you have it. It's Ok with me.”
After taking a wash it was time for me to say good bye.
“I will go now Shane. I must go now. I don’t know whether I will get a chance to see you again. But I wish you good luck and ‘May God bless you’ I have a small present for you.”
He went to his suit case and took out a book from it. I can guess what it is....
“This is the Bible that mother sent me, I want you to have it. Try to read it soon. After reading it if you believe write to me it will bring me a lot of happiness. In the mean time I will ask God to give you desire to read it.”
I put my arms around him. I was crying. We held each other for a long time. Finally he raised my head and kissed my
cheeks and finally my lips. Then he came to drop me to my car and I was holding his present and the jogging suit in a plastic bag with me. When I got into the car he waved his hand at me and said good bye and God bless.
I was a little bit late when I got to the airport but as I was travelling first class and they didn’t make a fuss about it.
There were some reporters at the airport that asked some silly questions from me. I had to answer them.
Publicity is something that is very important to do good business and I had to be extra careful when I am in front of reporters not to hurt them. One guy asked me whether I don’t think of marriage. I wanted to shout and tell them that I want Shane. I thought that I should have come this trip on our private jet. But Papa was going to Greece so I had to take a commercial flight. I should ask Papa to buy another jet for me.
I got a corner seat and the next seat to me was empty. I wished Shane was there. Then again I decided that it is high time for me to forget about him. I will never have him, so what is the use of thinking about him. Some day he will realize that he was on the wrong path and then it’s too late... no, it’s three late. I took two valiums and closed my eyes.