Chapter 33
Coming out of my room I saw Lea walking... no running towards me. She was looking down so I don't think she saw me until I called her name.
“'Lea” I said
She stopped moving and looked up at me. She was about ten steps away but I could see something was wrong. She was crying and her arm looked red. I started walking forward but I needn't walk anymore before she ran into my arms crying into my chest.
“Leah, what happen?” I said wrapping my arms around her shoulders. She had her arms wrapped around my waist and her head lay on my chest. I kissed her head and held her in my arms before moving her into my room.
“Come on, sit down” I said showing her to the bed and sitting next to her. I brought my hand to her face wiping away her tears and pulling her hair away. “Now tell me what happen”
She looked up at me and I thought my heart was going to break.
She stayed there on the bed and told me everything.
I'm going to kill him! I thought to myself and after him I'm going to kill Jess. It was the worst sound in the world, to hear her cry. I wanted to make it stop but I didn't know what to say.
'Stay here' I said leaving the room before she could say anything.
I leave the room and couldn't stop the anger running through me, I felt like I was about to blow. I never wanted to hurt someone more in my life. My breathing was coming out in harsh breaths and every muscle in my body was tense.
I was walking down the hall when I saw Ben going into his room; he held his head up to me with a smile but when he saw my face and not making eye contact with him he furrowed and looking worried.
“What's wrong?” he asked but I ignored him and kept walking. He pulled out his arm so it went cross my chest but out all that went through my head was. This guy was stopping me from killing that sick rat! I wanted to kill him too, forgetting that he was my brother in a rage. I pushed it away, making him back off.
“Get out of my way!” I said angrily
“No you’re not going anywhere like this, now tell me” he said trying to keep up with me walking down the hall. This was making me angrier. He was getting in the way again.
“You can't stop me” I said pushing him away again.
I left him in the hall and I continued to find Alex. I don't care how long I get in prison I don't want that sick twisted no good dick anywhere near her again. I carried on walking towards where I thought was Alex's room. My heart was beating fast and my fisted where clenched together.
I turned the corner of the hall where the staircase to the main entrance is when Connor and Jake stood in my way, with their arms crossed, who did they think they were two nightclub bouncers? They both glared at me and blocked my path. I stood strong taking calm breaths in to try to remember that these are my friends, these are my friends. But every time I closed my eyes I saw that punk touching Lea or seeing her face as she cried.
I stood my ground; I'll get them out my way if it lost me my friends. I heard running from behind me and turned to see Ben and Karl running towards us so they were now at the back of me, all of them blocking me in. I felt like a wild animal trying to get free to kill.
I looked to Ben who was lowered his arms trying to calm me down. 'I called them' he said. I looked back at them all one by one.
“Get out my way” I grunted
They all looked at each other. “What happened?” Jake asked but I couldn't answer him because just thinking what happened drove me crazy. I shook my head side to side and started pacing left to right, wall to wall in the little space they left me. I tried to think of ways to calm down but it wasn't working. The only thing that I could think of that made me feel better was to kick his ass or kill him either one. I liked the second best. I moved to get past them again trying to catch them off grudge which worked. I got past them and started running but Jake and Connor both at the same time rugby tackled me by the legs and took me down. Connor was sitting on my back and Jake was holding my arms around me. It took both of them to take me down but I was still packing a fight to get them off me.
“Is he drunk?” Connor yelled.
I pulled with all my might to free my hands which were pulled from Jake's grip and I started punishing in the air hoping to hit someone, anyone just so I could get free.
“Karl! Grad his other arm! Ben shut him up! Before people start coming out” Jake said grading my right arm and Karl handle back my left. With me still pulling and pushing to get free.
“I'm going to kill him!” I shouted just before Bens hands went hard around my mouth.
“Jesus Chris you're bloody strong” Connor said as he lifted me off the floor with all three of the others pulling me up. They were pulling me in some room but I couldn't tell were because of all the pulling and fighting I was doing.
Before I could work out what was going on, they all let me go making me full to the floor. I let out a yell of pain before quickly getting up from the floor and saw we were in someone's suite. I looked around to see that Karl was standing near the door other locking it and the others all circled me.
“Now tell us what's happened” Ben said.
“Aaghh!” I yield aloud bring my hands around my head, through my hair.
“Who do you want to kill?” Jake asked. I tried to say his name but the hate that was spiralling through me I couldn't control so I just pasted back and forth in the room.
“That sick peace of shit! I want to kill him but you! All of you! Stopped me” I yelled at them all.
“Chris we saved you from getting in serious trouble. I knew something was up when I saw you and knew I need the guys to calm you down” Ben said moving closer to me.
“So calm the hell down and tell us what happened?” Connor said.
“'Calm down? CALM DOWN! Are you having a laugh” I basically screamed in his face. “Tell you want Connor let's cut the crap of a bit yer. Tell me if you just found out some guy tried to rape Lilly what would you do? Ha!” I said to try and make him understand the angrier that was rushing through me. His face looked shocked and full of hate.
“Where's Lil...”he said moving closer to me but I blanked him and turned to Karl.
“… and you Karl what if you hard that about Gemma!” He now had the same face that Connor pulled. “Jake! You can lie to yourself all you want but I can tell you care about Kate never if you both hate each other. So ANSWER ME! How would you all be feeling if this happened to you? TELL ME!”
“Leah?” Jake said
“That... mother fucker... wanker... tried to rap her! Her own cousin! And that... that bitch planned it all!” I said. The guys all looked confused but they didn't ask anything and I didn't care if I was making sense. “How would you feel? Having the girl you loved scared and hurt over some sick twisted ass hole. Seeing her cry and shaken up in your arms so fragile...”
There was silence in the room.
Then Karl spoken 'I would want to rip his throat out' he said moving away from the door and opening it. Ben gave him a confused look but the other three either looked the other way or was deep in thought about what I just said.
“What are you doing?” Ben ran over to the door and shut it. “You can't just go kill this guy”
“Why can't he? I would if some prat touched your sister” Karl said.
“Aren't you guys going to stop this? Come on! I know you all feel the same about killing this guy but and the end of the end you can't it's not right and you won't be able to live with yourself if you do this” Ben turned to reason with everyone. Jake still stood here shocked about what I said about him and Kate and Karl had now gone and sat in one of the chairs. The next person to talk was Connor who walked away from the window he was looking out of.
“I know how this feels Chris” he said to me. How could he know how this feels? HOW? I felt like I wanted to rip his low life apart like he tried to do to Lea. I looked up at him about to go off on one about him not knowing.
“A couple of years ago Lilly was 'friends' with this photograph guy, he made her... do things. Things she didn't want to do. One day I walked in on him trying it on with her. He'd hit her and she was just lying there life less. I was going to kill him. I was shaking and I felt wild with anger. It's not right, having that mush hate in your body at once we're you could literally rip the guy apart. I just kept on hitting him and hitting him. I was so close to killing him... when I heard Lilly say my name. I turned around to see her looking at me with fear in her eyes.
She looked so scared at me with his blood my hands and on my shirt and when I moved closer to her she flinched away from me with tears in her eyes”. He said as everyone in the room was died quiet and I looked to Jake who looked the most shocked by the story.
'I didn't want to stop hitting him and making him pay but the look on Lilly's face at what I just done. That hurt me more than anything in this world. After the shock she let me hold her and take her home but I'll never forget that moment of fear that I caused her to feel” he finished looking at me.
“So what you saying I shouldn't kill him?” I asked
“All I'm saying is at that moment I felt that by killing him I would feel better and make her safe but the only thing that made me feel better was when I got to hold her in my arms and keep her safe by always being by her side but you know what still hurts, what eats me up inside?”
“That you didn't kill him there and then?”
“No, the fact that I scared her. That she was in that moment scared of me. Of that part of me she saw that day. That hurts more than anything” he said walking out of the room saying nothing else. He's right. I want to kill him, so badly but would I want to live the rest of my life knowing that Lea sees me as a killer.
I started walking towards the open door to leave the room. “Where are you going?” Ben asked as I walked out the door asking
“To Lea” I said.
Connor was right; all I want to do is stay by her and make sure she's safe. Hold her and just let her cry on my shoulder until all the sadness was out of her body. I walked back quickly to my room and looked at the bed were I left Lea not to see her there. My face dropped and my heart stopped. Where was she? I needed her here; I needed her to stop me going to kill him.
Just then I heard the bathroom room open and saw Lea wrapped in one of the hotel dressing gowns with wet hair. She must have just got out the shower. I was so happy she was still here and hadn't gone. She looked up at me on the other side of the room and her eyes widened bigger as she noticed me there.
“Sorry I needed to wash and get that dress off. I would have gone back to my room but you said to stay here and well I didn't want...” she started to say before I half ran up to her and kissed her wrapping my arms around her.
I wanted to act as her shield.
I wanted to cover her and wrap myself all around her to keep her safe from danger and harm.
I wanted to be her everything.
Because I knew she was mine.