That was unexpected.
I did not plan what happened between Ree and me. If I had, I could not have planned it better.
God! She is beyond hot.
The emotions coursing through me when I look at Reana are difficult for me to process. I understand the lust. I don’t know why it’s there, but I’m used to the feeling now. There are others, which I can neither name nor understand. They are difficult and a little painful, but they refuse to leave no matter how much I will them away.
After this morning, there’s no turning back. I can’t imagine not kissing and touching Ree. I can’t imagine not having access to her body. Most importantly, I can’t wait to do more to her, with her.
Reana has become very quiet, though. She says she enjoyed the kiss, but she keeps moving away from me. I can’t tell if she’s scared or just unsure.
Testing, I lift my hand to her face and rub her lips.
Her eyes go shut and she lets out a low moan.
Reana’s explosive response and that sound just drive me crazy. ‘I want to kiss you again, Reana.’
Her eyes widen. In the surprised eyes, I read uncertainty and interest.
Encouraged, I go on. ‘I liked touching you. I want to touch you again, Reana.’
‘Stop.’ Reana’s voice is husky. Her breath hitches.
Eyes closed, she takes a few deep breaths. ‘I know what you want, but I … I don’t know.’ Reana drops her gaze.
Guessing what the issue is, I touch her chin so she lifts her gaze to mine. ‘There’s no pressure here, darling. This doesn’t have to be about anything but us.’
‘H-how do you mean?’
‘We’re married, and we enjoy touching each other. Can’t we share our bodies?’
Her eyes dart away. She says nothing.
Maybe I was wrong. ‘It’s fine if you don’t want to.’
Reana’s uncertain gaze jerks back to mine. ‘No. It’s not that I don’t want to but …’
‘But?’ I take a step closer to her.
This time, she does not move back. Though, Reana’s voice drops a notch and becomes slightly breathy again when she speaks.
I file away this tidbit for later.
‘You say we should share our bodies. That’s more than just a kiss every once in a while.’
I nod. ‘True.’
‘I don’t know how that would … what that would mean for us.’
I rack my brain but I can think of nothing that it could mean. ‘Do you want it to mean something?’
Reana gives a quick headshake. ‘I just wondered … I mean ... I’m still not comfortable with that level of intimacy.’
‘I understand, Reana. We agreed to move at your pace, remember? You don’t mind me kissing you. We won’t do more than that until you want to.’
***
It has been close to two weeks since we got married.
I more or less promised to let Reana come to me in her own time, but I don’t know how much longer I can take this. Every single day over the past two weeks, I’ve spent half of the day pretending not to stare at Reana. The other half, I’ve spent trying not to feel embarrassed by the vivid thoughts running through my head.
I get to kiss Reana whenever I want to, and that’s great.
Sometimes, there’s petting, and it’s just … everything. However, the more we do all that, the more it drives me crazy that we can’t do more.
I’ve always been a sound sleeper, but now, I spend each night tossing and turning. There were several nights when I barely stopped myself from going to Reana’s room.
On the plus side, this whole thing has taught me how much I deceive myself. I married Reana for a baby, but I haven’t thought about it even once in two weeks. I just want Reana’s body. This morning, my desire for her is particularly strong after the dream I had at night. As I have done on more than one occasion, I head to the upstairs gym where I deliver punches to a bag while imagining my face on it.
An hour later, some of the excess energy is gone.
A lot more level-headed, I think of calling Reana up for some of the self-defense workout we’ve been doing.
She’s been learning rather fast where before, she had zero interest in any form of workout.
I suppose experiencing violence is a huge inspiration.
Just as I reach for my phone, an e-mail notification pops up. It’s a work emergency.
Omar should have handled this.
I am not surprised that he hasn’t, though.
Omar has been cutting down on his workload and delegating more since their accident last year. Before that, he preferred to do everything by himself. He’s cut down even more since Yesmin got pregnant.
I put in a call to him.
Omar answers in a smooth voice. ‘What’s up, Misbah? Or should I say ‘M’?’
The joke makes me smile. Only Reana calls me ‘M’ as if we’re in a James-Bond movie.
‘Hello, Omar. Did you get any e-mail from the foreman on the Bluebell property?’
‘No.’
‘I did. There seems to be a hitch, and the inspection is in a few days. I figured you’d want to look into it since that property’s your baby.’
‘Yeah … I can’t right now. Yesmin and I are at the doctor’s office.’
‘Is everything okay?’
‘Just another appointment. Her due date is getting closer and they want us coming in all the time now. I swear, I have a mind to install a doctor in our home.’
My smile widens at the slight frustration leaking through Omar’s voice.
‘Thank God the doctor’s a woman. If it were a man, I might think he gets off on looking at pregnant women. Then we’d have a serious problem.’ Omar’s tone is bland when he says this, which makes it funnier.
I hear Yesmin giggling in the background.
‘Even with a female doctor, you can’t be too sure.’ I put in.
‘Thank you very much for putting that picture in my head, Misbah.’
‘You’re welcome.’
‘Can you handle the building business?’
‘No problem.’ I mentally adjust my plans for the day.
‘Thanks. How’s Reana? Have you set a doctor’s appointment yet? Or you want us to talk to ours for you?’
I know Omar is ragging on me as payback, and I shouldn’t give him the satisfaction, but for some reason, I feel the need to explain. ‘We don’t need one yet.’
‘No?’ Omar asks in his serious tone. ‘So you don’t need a doctor to help you nut in a cup? You know, in case you’re afraid to do it with your wife the normal way?’
His words hit closer to home than he probably thinks.
Yesmin’s gentle voice chides, ‘Omar’.
Chuckling, Omar ends the call.
My mind goes to Reana. I couldn’t have gotten a better woman than her. She’s sweet, gentle, ridiculously sexy and just … everything.
We aren’t doing it yet, but so what? I’m sure we’ll get there, and it’s going to be magical when we do.
Maybe after we cross that bridge, I can find a way to persuade Ree to stay married to me forever. Forget what she thinks is our initial agreement. I don’t want anyone else.
Set to go out, I enter Reana’s room. ‘Ree?’
‘Ree is in an oversized t-shirt and jean shorts, with a freshly scrubbed, glowing face. ‘What’s going on? Why are you dressed?’ A small furrow appears between her eyebrows.
‘Hello, love.’ I force myself to look away from her legs. ‘I have to go out.’
‘Hi. Where? Can I come?’
‘I wish, but it’s for work.’ As it has somehow become a habit, my thumb rubs Reana’s lips.
A slight smile flits around her mouth. The dimple in her right cheek flashes.
With a wink, I put my hands in my pockets to prevent them from wandering to Reana’s other body parts. ‘There’s an issue with a site. It’s a bit of an emergency.’
Ree nods.
‘Do you think you’ll be okay for an hour or two? I hate leaving you home by yourself.’
Her smile widens. ‘I’ll be fine, M. I have some work to do anyway.’ Ree leans onto her tiptoes and kisses me on my cheek.
Before she pulls back, I grab her ponytail and direct her lips to mine.
Relaxing, Reana returns my kiss without hesitation.
With a final nip on her bottom lip, I stroke her back down to her butt before pulling back. ‘Do the routine work out in the gym for an hour. I’ll check the footage when I return, and we’ll work on some of those moves, okay?’
Looking slightly dazed, Ree nods.
I head out, feeling stirred but hopeful.