Thrashing Ale with Den Sidion by John T Buckley - HTML preview

PLEASE NOTE: This is an HTML preview only and some elements such as links or page numbers may be incorrect.
Download the book in PDF, ePub, Kindle for a complete version.

Chapter 6

The Chagrin of Daserus

“When mean and worthless creatures inhabit the pure man’s soul then it is he who becomes the monster of death and vile and wretched destruction. Only then can we lose our reason for being. It is also they who capture our laughter and passions with hands of steel and spiked fingers and hurl them into the hearth to be melted together with their desperation and stupidity. Only now can a man of wisdom and power feel such treachery and he feels it on the horizon and he casts out his shields and knows he’ll be protected. Thusly, he is whole but not without the wounds of lost trust and faith in friends. Then it is he who finds a friend in loneliness, as all others let him down so many times when once was far too much. I pray for him today and the world his naïve eyes will have to see. He looks through a thick film of wisdom and experience that cover his eyes and he is able to cast away his attackers. Even now I weep for him although I know his hardships are my hardships and his pain my past pain. Let the wind carry a love filled heart with escape and new beginnings. That is where my every other thought lies and this is why I ache for a person I’ve never met, but is entirely me and always will be,” said Daserus Babarian warmly as he paced back and forth through a series of holograms of different people he’d met and places he’d been. He was inside a dimly lit theater in Greenwich Village just a stone’s throw from Washington Park, as a crowd of 50 people sat and watched intently.

Daserus Babarian is 5’8” and 162 pounds of thin and quick bulging muscles. He has long dark brown straight hair with 3 braids on one side of his head and 2 on the other. He has red tinted fierce eyes that never leave your memory once you’ve seen them. His nose is thin at the top and gets progressively wider as you near his triangular tip, as well as a bump in the center. He has huge jagged hands and feet. He’s wearing a brown leather vest over a white cotton dress shirt. The shirt has no buttons and only a square

opening for his head, that also clearly shows his ripped chest and the passage,” We are sand in a dusty farmer’s eye as he finishes his day, but at least we are something. And that is why I thirst for another day as sand in another farmer’s eye,” written around the right bicep in tiny red and black letters. He also has on tan corduroy pants with the face of Braa Friemosa stitched onto each leg.

Braa Friemosa is the woman who got caught in a national scandal after being the first woman to write uncomplimentary things about the Doramocs in a book of verse titled Trips to Nowhere. It included a list of obvious lies the Doramocs were using like,” If we are in error then let us know of this error and we’ll gladly correct it with no harm to you or yours,” which many people figured out led to the death of every person they were related to, as well as their friends.

The theater is shaped like a jellyfish and will lit up like one after a performer leaves the stage. There are 25 two person black leather couches with inmate’s ramblings from Leavenworth Prison all over them and they include the passage,” I got what society gave me. A drunk father who beat me and a crazy uncle who put cigarettes out on my wrists to lighten the mood. Also a mountain lion of a neighbor who fucked my ass raw one evening when there was no one around. So I ended up doing hard time for the likely crime of insider trading. That’s right and it was worth it,” as well as another that read,” I drove a semi truck for 37 years and never saw an exit sign that inspired me even a bit. Then one night I saw one that did, it read wrong way go back. And if I hadn’t already drank my 10th beer I just may have, but instead I found a way right through the Datsun and a house behind it whora!”

“This Daserus guy is my new hero, Pat. I’ve never seen someone so likable and yet saying abrasive things. What do you think, Pat, are you gonna suck his dick?” asked Rosemary sarcastically as Daserus walked up to a hologram of New Haven Connecticut after the earthquake three summers prior.

Pat made a hand gesture like a duck’s bill and Rosemary laughed. This caused several people to shush her and she glared at them and blew them kisses.

“Only if I get to suck yours first!” fired back Pat as he crossed his arms. “I like the limp ones,” said Pat sarcastically as he pulled out a bottle of Hydrocodone pills and then opened it and threw 3 in his mouth.

Rosemary held out her hand and Pat gave her 2 pills and she cleared her throat so he gave her 2

more.

“Don’t do it, Pat, she’ll choke ya. And, it’s covered in a green lather. I kid you not,” said Den sarcastically as he leaned forward in between Pat and Rosemary from the couch behind them. Then the crowd shushed him.

“Everyone…everyone is their father’s expectations and mother’s worst fears just beneath their family filled skin. They pass through decades of their parents glossed over memories of their lives and yours every time you speak. The Man who worked the steel for 70 days to make a ring that gets lost in a sink’s drain, is never mentioned or considered. But his lust and passion felt by us all none the same,” said Daserus sternly as he interlocked his fingers and stood in front of a hologram of an ice cream truck floating above a ravine. There was also a spiral of red and blue lightning bolts shooting up at it repeatedly from the ravine.

Then a dozen light blue glowing balls (the size of Volkswagen Beetles) floated down from the ceiling as the song,” Why question truth, it’s just a liar,” by the band,” Porous Wet Blankets,” started to thunder through the speakers on the walls of the room.

Porous Wet Blankets are a 2 piece consisting of Tomapu Sarga and Ed Riggings, with Tomapu playing guitar, bass, and keyboards simultaneously as he sings Soprano. Ed plays the brass bucket and tin flask with a large black steel dildo. Tomapu got into a bit of trouble recently when he injected himself with heroin while his wife Batio was giving birth to their first son Bura inside a taxicab. Ed also got in a spell of trouble when he showed up at a circumcision with his uncircumcised penis protruding from a codpiece and a t-shirt that read,” Save the beef and save the world. Don’t harm a young boy’s ego.”

“This is so surreal, look at all this, Grega,” said Amo in disbelief as she watched the balls float down and then explode. They released thousands of fireflies and there was a thick aroma of Lilacs and Rose pedals.

Grega looked at everything and felt a rush of joy come over him as he smiled and then kissed Amo on the cheek.

“Amo, this is the reason for everything good to be good. I marvel at its beauty,” said Grega happily as Daserus started to dance in a circle and sing loudly as a group of notes soared to the back of the theater.

“We are nothing if not the beginnings of the future’s embrace. Try the rhythm of joy and know that happiness comes to us all by choice and when WE WANT!” said Daserus happily as he jumped up in the air and grabbed a black electric guitar and he was playing it before he hit the stage.

Daserus proceeded to play an unbelievable solo and a set of chords as everyone cheered and marveled at him.

“I heard this shit before. That’s a blatant Jimi Hendrix Kurt Cobain rip off. Listen to the riff it’s almost Lithium exactly,” said Den sharply as he threw his hands up in disgust and leaned in on Pat who was rocking out.

“Fuck off, Den, this guy is killin’ it. You’re just jealous ‘cause the only instrument you play is ass-chordian and it STINKS!” said Rosemary jokingly in a loud voice then she howled with laughter and Den messed up her hair.

“Then it’s lovey dovey with Daserus. Who quite frankly was probably playin’ for tips and clean underwear in the street yesterday! Look at the stones rip off he’s into now,” said Den flippantly as he grimaced and Daserus ripped into a riff similar to,” Paint it black,” by the Rolling Stones. Daserus ran up the wall and back-flipped through a holographic (and green and purple) ring of fire.

“The stones suck, this is way better! I haven’t heard a better performance since those bums at the door to the men’s room flew into I am the Walrus. Ohh the memories! “said Pat sarcastically as he gyrated back and forth. Rosemary laughed loudly and Den grinned.

Suddenly Daserus froze in his tracks and a skeleton encircled his body, as an orange meadow of flowers filled the stage.

“Like it or liken it to a pure innocent child reaching for his own place in the world, the world has changed. We’re all dead already…if we don’t rip the Doramocs hands off our dreams! I still sing to the ones who can’t, a song from anything good and everywhere we aren’t. About what it was like before the laughter died. And no one believes me that it could have been so free and so amazing, but my great grandfather remembers when we could say and do everything we wanted. Today are the days, of so many those were the days. Let me know you feel it!” said Daserus boldly as he wept and shook the microphone violently in front of his face as everyone cheered loudly. Den shook his head and made a motion like he was cutting his own throat.

“I have to meet this person. He’s somebody powerful,” said Rosemary excitedly as she smiled and clapped loudly.

Then the lights came up and the room lit up like a giant jellyfish. A red haired young lady hurried up to Daserus and put a black towel over his shoulder. Daserus kissed her on the lips and then wiped off the sweat from his brow with the towel. Everyone in the crowd started walking towards him rapidly.

“Hi there, Daserus, that was really inspiring to experience. My name is Rosemary, hello,” said Rosemary warmly as she offered her hand. Daserus had a wry smile come across his face, as he was instantly smitten with Rosemary. Daserus took her hand and put it on his half hard boner and Rosemary blushed and said nervously,” Well our awkward meeting is really going swimmingly, woo.”

“You’re the best looking woman I’ve ever seen. And that raging hard-on in your hand would love to meet your hot wet pussy and as soon as possible,” said Daserus in a firm voice as Rosemary felt his large penis and let out a quick breath. She thought how amazing the moment was and looked him in the eye for a second.

“Yeah, whenever the hell you want. Fuck yeah, let’s get it on! Do you live around here?” asked Rosemary in a sultry voice as she gripped his penis hard and then he smiled.

“I live here actually I’ve got a small apartment out back we could use. Rosemary, we’re about to throttle each other’s destiny at the speed of light, at least let us be prepared for the repercussions of this.

Do you believe in forever?” asked Daserus warmly as he reached out and grabbed onto Rosemary’s left breast. She instantly kissed him hard passionately for several seconds and then she pulled back from him.

“Only if always lasts,” said Rosemary slyly as she grinned.

Grega and everyone just looked at each other ready to burst out with laughter.

“Let’s take a walk and find ourselves in the blackness of it all,” said Daserus warmly as he took Rosemary’s hand and led her towards a door at the back of the stage.

“Hey, Rosemary, don’t sign any credit card forms! It could be a scam!” yelled Den jokingly as he watched Rosemary walk to the door. She gave Den the finger and went through the door with Daserus feeling her butt.

“Boy I hope she gets pregnant. The whole world’s hoping for another fuckshit,” said Grega sarcastically as he grinned and Amo hit his chest playfully.

“Grega, that’s not funny. Just let her be happy Daserus is handsome at the very least,” said Amo begrudgingly as she started to think about sex with Grega and gave him a look.

“Amo, we just banged 2 hours ago. Are you trying to put me in the ground?” asked Grega half-jokingly as Amo tried to kiss him and he pulled away.

“I’m tryin’ to put you in the bed. For at least 3 or 4 hours of why the hell not get naked? Well, let’s have it you Prick Fucker. I want that penis good and hard and to be rammed into my cold pussy hard. Get those clothes off!” said Amo sternly as she tried to wrestle Grega’s shirt off. He laughed and resisted while Pat and Den laughed.

“Alright look, you wench of all wench’s, I’ll have sex with you later after we go to the spiritual den of Purth. And don’t worry it will be all night and hot and heavy alright?” asked Grega as he giggled and Amo tried to get a kiss and grabbed his butt.

“Fine, but I am gonna rip your head off when we do. If you think it will be an hour and then snoring, you’re dreamin’,” said Amo sternly as she gently punched Grega’s arm repeatedly and smiled at him. He laughed hysterically and Pat lit up a cigar. Den casually looked around the room at the colors on the walls.

Meanwhile Rosemary and Daserus were just entering his apartment. It has a triangular brass bed with a harness set up on it as well as red silk sheets, blankets, and white silken round pillows with the words,” The spirit of intellect is dead in a mind filled with holes of racism and bigotry, but alive if it fills those holes with compassion and forgiveness,” written on the blankets in dark yellow letters. The bed itself sits inside a square hot tub and has a pair of red staircases leading up to either side of the bed. There are also several leather masks, jackets, chaps, and large women’s boots on the walls, as well as whips, dildos and two boxes of female KY jelly on the left wall. On the right wall there is a picture of Slapor Abuid it shows him bashing a Doramoc over the head with a mallet.

Slapor Abuid was,” the man who tempted God,” as the people of Boston called him. He was a lawyer who sued the world for 500 billion dollars. He claimed they’d duped him into believing in a higher power all his life. And this systematical global deception had kept him from prospering in life and being

truly happy. He brought the case to court after court appealing his case all the way to the Supreme Court.

Once there he brought character witnesses of priests and Rabbis who swore under oath to having not believed in God themselves even though they felt religion was important in a person’s life, they willfully duped people into believing. The case dragged on for 5 days with one witness-a homeless man-arguing that he was God himself. This further supported Slapor’s claims that only a crazy person could ever truly believe in God, and that supporters of the almighty were willing deceivers of us all. This caused us to waste time on church when we could’ve become more successful. The high court deliberated for 3 days and then came back and deemed that Slapor had been duped, and was entitled to damages of no less than 7 billion dollars from all organized religions on Earth. Then as he was leaving the courthouse a torrential rain storm slammed down and quickly turned to lightning and hale. Slapor got hit 4 times by lightning bolts killing him on the spot.

There is a hologram of a beautiful blonde haired woman pretending to be cleaning the apartment named Hisella. Hisella walked towards Daserus and said happily,” Daserus, oh you are a vision and a genius of the world’s elite. Come ravage me again and again.”

“That’s Hisella, she’s my companion of sorts. I’m allergic to dogs so,” said Daserus nervously as he felt a bit embarrassed, but still had his mind on sex with Rosemary. He remained calm as she looked around the room.

“So am I, yeah I hate dogs. They literally make me violently ill for weeks at a time. I see you’ve got a bit of a stud’s lair of pleasures here. I can respect that, so how do you wanna have sex?” asked Rosemary as she looked at a strap-on 9 inch black dildo and thought how interesting it was that a man had it.

“Well, I thought we’d do 69 to warm up. Then I’ll put you in the harness and I’ll put on my strap-on around my waist. And then we’ll do both holes at the same time,” said Daserus happily as he wrapped his arms around Rosemary and squeezed her tightly. She rubbed his forearm and let out a long sigh.

“Yeah, I knew this was true love. I hope I can rely on you to be a good secret keeper, ‘cause I get a bit weird during sex,” said Rosemary slyly as she implied a question and reached back and grabbed Daserus by the cock. He instantly started ripping off his clothes and then she turned to face him.

“That’s a given, call me Luther Longdoddle from here on in,” said Daserus sternly as he slipped out of the last of his clothes as did Rosemary.

“Luther Longdoddle, can you help me find my car keys, I can’t remember where I left them?” asked Rosemary coyly in a little girl’s voice as she sucked on her index finger.

Daserus’ eyes lit up and he ran over and grabbed a long red hand shaped dildo.

“I’ve got the tools to find it, fear not. Now get on that bed you Bitch!” said Daserus loudly as he glared at Rosemary.

She ran and jumped on the bed followed by him.

“Luther Longdoddle, examine me crevices before I die!” shouted Rosemary as she was lying down on her back and lifted her legs in the air. Rosemary put her neatly trimmed pussy up and shook it from side to side. Daserus spun around with his boner right in her face and she grabbed hold of it with her mouth and started giving him head. Daserus started pounding her with the red dildo.

Rosemary rubbed his cock fast and then slowly, as she licked his cock and moaned as he licked her pussy.

Daserus continued pounding her pussy with the dildo.

“Are you gonna suck that fucking cock faster or what?!” shouted Daserus as he kept licking Rosemary’s pussy then rubbed her thighs and ass. She rubbed his cock against her cheeks and breasts.

“Keep eating that pussy, Luther Longdoddle, or I’ll spank your ass red!” shouted Rosemary then she smiled and let out a moan of ecstasy.

Meanwhile out in the theater Grega and everyone were over at the food machines waiting for Rosemary and getting some hot meals. They had meatloaf sandwiches that had round baked rolls filled with a spicy meatloaf and a creamy Alfredo cheese sauce as well as whipped potatoes with country gravy inside a meatball on an eatable fried corn popsicle.

“So, is Daserus killing Rosemary right now and making her into this meatloaf were eating? Or is he making Rosemary a baby she can yell at, and get to do laundry while she collects government checks?”

asked Den sarcastically as he ate his meatloaf stick and sat on a black leather couch facing the stage.

Amo and Grega were on his right and Pat beside him on the same couch.

“Laundry no, she’d have ‘em making t-shirts and mowing the lawn while she ate macaroni and cheese,” said Pat jokingly then he bit into a smoked salmon and cheese sandwich, it had tiny fried chicken balls throughout the honey glazed roll.

“Na, fucking Rosemary needs a kid to dig graves for her when she goes on her killing spree. I always thought it’d be me to dig those very graves. I don’t think I’ll ever get over her movin’ on with random artsy guy. Maybe I’ll write a song about it, call it Hey Jude,” said Grega sarcastically as a wry grin came across his face and they all nearly choked with laughter.

“I think another man had the same idea once, but he dug the graves himself and became known as Jeffrey Dalmer. Oh how great those two minds are they each share. Fills my eyes with a watery discharge,” said Amo sarcastically and in a stern voice as she eyed Grega and he nodded back and pretended to wipe her fake tears.

“And mine, oh now I have a soul to share my ache with. And eventually hack up as she sleeps. Isn’t this the pick of the litter and I do mean garbage, mostly worn out rubbers and half eaten glue sticks. Is it love, Mine Amo?” asked Grega sarcastically in a dramatic fashion as he smiled a goofy grin and kissed Amo’s hair. Amo tossed her hair and pulled out a pack of smokes.

“It is, a love of your dead body in my back freezer. And that’s real love, the fresh and gooey kind,”

said Amo sarcastically as she grinned and kissed Grega’s arm. She then proceeded to lick his elbow.

“That’s homicide one, be sure to burn the body or they’ll electrocute ya. Happened to my uncle Harry,” said Den sarcastically as he chewed the last of his meatloaf stick. They all looked at him with their mouths wide open and Den smiled and said slyly,” A poor relation, Pat’s got 50 of ‘em.”

“Hey we married into those, they were rumrunners so what,” said Pat sarcastically as he pretended to fidget in his seat.

“Rum, or was it a 4 state prostitution ring? ‘Cause I heard a t’ing or two, Patty?” asked Grega slyly as he grinned and Pat squirmed. While Amo laughed and popped open an ice cold can of Dr. Pepper.

“So what, you’d pay for it if you weren’t so good looking and you know it, Grega,” said Pat defiantly as he smiled slightly and then threw up his hands while Den stretched out his arms.

“What do you mean would, where do you think I got Amo?” asked Grega sarcastically then Amo looked at him wide eyed and pretended to be choking him.

Meanwhile Rosemary and Daserus were still having sex with Rosemary on top of him. She wore a clown mask and 6 inch leather heels. Rosemary thrusted up and down at lightning speed and shouted,”

Luther Longdoddle, you better cum quick or you’re fuckin’ meat!!!”

Daserus thrust into her again and again as he spanked her ass. Daserus grabbed her breasts and then shouted,” I’m not done with you yet! Ride that cock and fuck me good, fuck you!”

Then the two of them started thrusting as fast as they could and moaning like wounded animals.

Rosemary and Daserus started to cum and let out an ear piercing scream. Rosemary fell on top of him hard 5 times. Then she slid off his cock and started sucking it and said sternly,” I love the way you taste.”

“So do I,” said Daserus slyly as he looked at Rosemary and grinned while he rubbed her head.

Rosemary stopped and laid down beside Daserus and asked warmly,” So am I your type, ’cause I can change if I’m not?”

“Ah yeah, you’re the best thing I could’ve ever hoped for. You’re the reason I kept myself available all these years. I didn’t think I’d ever find you. It was getting very bleak in recent months, but here you are and I am happy. Am I what you’re in to?” asked Daserus sincerely as he put his arm around Rosemary.

Rosemary smiled and gave his chiseled body a looking over and patted his chest.

“That’s an understatement if there ever was one. How ‘bout this, what if we head out and see what Amo and everyone is doing or if they left me here? We had planned on Den of Purth getting some medicine,” said Rosemary calmly as she stood up and started putting her clothes back on.

“I’m all about the medicine. Ya know you could have a bit to eat before we go?” said Daserus implying a question as he put on his clothes and looked at Rosemary.

Rosemary was already dressed and she did a tah-dah motion with her hands and winked at him. Then she gave him a quick kiss.

“Yeah we’ll hit someplace on the way, hurry up, Longdoddle, I need to move around because I’m too happy to stand still,” said Rosemary happily as she danced around the room and Daserus finished getting dressed.

They hurried out to the theater and saw Grega and everyone sitting on the couches. Pat pretended to be an ape and moved around sporadically.

“I KNEW you were a jackass! You were lying all along!” yelled Rosemary jokingly as she and Daserus ran up to everyone hand in hand. Each of them looked at them and laughed.

“So what, I’m part ape I can’t help it,” said Pat sarcastically as he scratched his head and flopped down on the couch. He felt embarrassed that he didn’t get Rosemary and Daserus did, but he didn’t want to let on.

“So, Rosemary, you look happy and relaxed. Did you read your bible passages and talk politics all this time?” asked Den sarcastically as he stood up and extended his hand to Daserus and said sternly,”

Nice to meet cha, Buddy, Den’s the name.

“Daserus, nice to meet you too, Den,” said Daserus anxiously as he grinned at Den who chuckled to himself.

“I’m Grega this is, Amo, and the half ape is, Pat,” said Grega warmly as he mimicked Pat’s ape routine, but kept sniffing his own butt and using a shocked expression.

“Very funny, Grega, don’t let Grega fool ya. His Pa spent a lot of time with his sheep and got to know their hindquarters very exclusively,” said Pat sarcastically as Grega grinned and nodded yes.

Daserus and Rosemary laughed.

“Those sheep loved him back! And those charges were never proven! So what if he smelled of goat, it was common for a farmer to inspect hindquarters for fleas and ticks!” said Grega sarcastically as he paced back and forth with his hand above his head. Then laughter filled the room like a burst of light.

“Ok, Grega, enough weirdness out of you for one day. Are we going to the Den of Purth or what?”

asked Rosemary sternly as she tried not to smile and crossed her arms. Rosemary glared at Grega who smiled and threw up his hands.

“We’re gone, let’s head out and get on the Dasiom expressway. We should be at the Purth soon enough,” said Grega happily then he slapped Amo’s butt. Grega ran towards the outside of the theater with her chasing after him.

The Dasiom expressway is a collection of anti-gravity taxicabs that look like prominent Doramocs.

They also look like former world leaders and alien warriors from Doramoc conquered worlds like the ruler Formu Goodtaker from the planet of Prash.

Formu Goodtaker was taken into police custody by the Doramocs and shipped to Earth for incarceration early last year. On his home world he was a ruthless general who seized power after killing his own brother who was emperor. He did this by filling his wine stock with a knockout drug. Then he brought his brother to a chalet in the valleys of Prash. Formu proceeded to punch him 8 times a day in the head for 1 month. Until eventually he died from a massive concussion. Formu fed his body piece by piece to his grieving family at his brother’s funeral, unbeknownst to them. Formu then set about removing every trace of his brother’s existence. He did this by tearing down statues and burning paintings of him, but was thwarted when the Doramocs descended upon Prash and overwhelmed his army. Much in the same way they had done to so many others, with an enormous precision first strike. And it included cutting off and contaminating the water supply.

Everyone went outside and Grega raised his credit card and it pulsed blue. A trio of Dasioms hurried down out of the expressway and over to where Grega and everyone were standing, each of which hovered only 6 inches above the ground and in the shape of Wexor, Abe Lincoln wearing sunglasses, and Formu Goodtaker showing his giant red beard and white glass eye.

“So now what?” asked Pat as the doors to the Dasiom slid open and turned into a set of steps leading inside.

“Who cares, I’m rich. Let’s take ‘em all, but I’m ridin’ with Rosemary and Daserus, sorry, Pat, B.O,”

said Grega jokingly as he limped clumsily into the Formu Dasiom.

“Fuck you, Grega, go shave your ass,” said Pat sharply as he got in the same one as Grega, as did everyone but Den, as he smiled and hopped in the Abe Lincoln one.

Inside the Formu it had plush felt covered seats that each faced a round center table. The table was made of black marble and you could watch holographic television. You could even watch what was outside the cab by flipping through the channels (with a brown leather covered remote control as your guide). Each chair could foldout and turn into a bed or you could rise up and pop your head out the sunroof with ease. There is a large glass refrigerator filled with meals, snacks, soda, and beer on the left hand side. You only needed to swipe your card over the item and it was yours.

On the right side of the Formu there was a trio of glass cases filled with designer shirts, sunglasses, keepsakes, and even several leather jackets from Armani and Gucci that you could easily buy inside the 50 foot long interior. There is also a trio of Gasblack men set up in a row that look like a bearded Gargoyle with his arms extended.

Gasblack Men is a hand’s on video game. It was where you had to work your way through several levels until you got to a certain point in the game. Then, luck willing, you have to wrestle one of three Gasblack robots. If you are able to pin them on their bellies before they’ve touched your head then they reveal to you a riddle that can lead to prizes like a ticket to the Jogou maze in Manhattan. Gasblack is named after Penivicious Tornoil Gasblack, the creator of the game and reputed mob boss.

Penivicious was knee deep in organized crime in New Jersey before he found a love for electronics and game making in his thirties. He then created several games including Gasblack Men that made him so much money he was paid straight. He made so much money that crime wasn’t worth it. Then he ran for Governor of New York, but got beat by a Doramoc. And when he tried to have that Doramoc killed, he got caught and had to go into hiding and hasn’t been seen since. There still remains a 300 million dollar reward for his capture or proof of his death.

“Alright my lovelies, let me type in our destination and we’re off,” said Grega as he entered the Den of Purth. Then their Caucasian and brown haired cab driver named Tipp raised his right hand quickly and they rocketed forward.

“Hey what the fuck are those statues over there?” asked Pat as he sat back in his seat.

Pat saw that one of the Gasblack robots was smiling right at him and it made him nervous. Rosemary saw them and started laughing.

“Jesus, look at those fucking things. They’re creepin’ me out. I’ll check ‘em and see if I can turn them to face a different direction,” said Grega firmly then he got up and walked over to the Gasblack robots. Grega started grabbing one of them when it rose up, it grabbed hold of his arm and Grega said startled,” What in the shit?!”

“You must pin me to the ground on my belly or you will lose your chance at glory! Do your best and do it now!” thundered the Gasblack 1 as it tried to climb up Grega.

Grega instantly thought to himself alright then and he started wrestling Gasblack 1 to the floor.

“Get ‘em, Grega, Pat needs a gal!” yelled Rosemary as she laughed as did Daserus while Pat grinned.

Grega grabbed hold of Gasblack 1 around the waist and throttled it to the floor. Grega grabbed its hands and pinned them behind its back as he laughed hysterically. Grega thought how fun it was to wrestle the Gasblack 1.

“Keep fighting me you little shit! I’ve got more power then you can handle! It’d take an army of you to defeat me. You just try it you Brat, go on try it. That’s what I thought,” said Grega gleefully as he wrestled the Gasblack 1 over onto its stomach.

“You’re enjoying this way too much, Grega, just pin him already,” said Amo happily as she smiled and watched Grega laughing at the Gasblack 1. He was slowly rolling him over onto his belly, as the Gasblack 1 squirmed like a fish out of water.

“No, not yet my friend we are having an epic battle. A battle that only wise and powerful men can fight and win,” declared Grega as he tried not to laugh. “C’mon you wimp try and struggle your way to freedom! You will fail you embarrassment!” said Grega greedily as he fought back laughter at the Gasblack 1 who continued to squirm.

“I will not give in, it is you who will have to defeat me!” said the Gasblack 1sternly as it kicked Grega hard in the leg. Grega broke out laughing and started slapping the Gasblack 1 hard in the face.

“What you little pussy?!” said Grega as he tried to keep from getting pinned himself. “You can’t handle my power! I will pummel you silly!” said Grega gleefully as he held both of the Gasblacks arms in one hand. Grega slapped Gasblack 1 good and hard as everyone laughed.

“Jesus, Grega, you’re slappin’ him to death,” said Pat as he smiled from ear to ear.

Grega pushed the Gasblack under his butt and let out a raunchy fart. Now everyone was laughing even harder.

“That’s right, that is right! Now you’ll suck on my scent of power and wiseness. Keep fighting me,”

said Grega sarcastically in an evil voice. Grega started to laugh uncontrollably as the Gasblack 1

squirmed even more.

“Your scent is choking me to death. Enough of Grega’s scent for one lifetime please,” pleaded Rosemary as she pinched her nostrils and opened the sunroof.

“Oh we’re just getting started. There’s more scent to come. My little friend knows it, don’t cha hmmm? Soak in my glory as you bend to my whims,” said Grega jokingly as he grinned and laughed. He pinned the Gasblack 1 on his belly and said quickly,” Alright fine I want to see what the prize is.”

Then the Gasblack curled into a ball and an ethereal woman’s voice started to sing in a high range a melodic song called,” The bumps of my Scarred Insurrection,” by the band One Footed Ass Kicker.

One Footed Ass Kicker is a Doramoc band that consists of 3 brothers who all moved to Earth after a long stint in the junior Doramoc army called the Britzh. Each plays guitar and sings incredibly intricate 3

part harmonies. Their music is compared to the Doramoc Beatles, The Railway Pillows, but failed to catch on anywhere on their native Forpush. Although on Earth they’ve had a string of 73 consecutive top five hits, and they currently own the entire top ten. They were embroiled in controversy early last year as the band’s front-man Y, was heard to say in an interview,” We love our fans to death, which is what they all deserve and will soon get.” These remarks were taken out of context as he said he was only joking. but the band endured 6 weeks of public ridicule and being the butt of many jokes on many of the late night talk shows.

“What in the fuck is this fucking weirdo doin’ now?” asked Rosemary in disgust as the Gasblack 1

started to do spins. And then the Gasblack 1 shook its head from side to side and stopped suddenly.

“While you slept, so did I but only in the sense that crying brings you rivers of time. Who am I if you had one guess? And don’t forget you can’t remember me yet,” said the Gasblack 1 brightly as he did a goofy little dance. Then he raised his arms above his head and a dozen holographic rays and spots of light encircled him. A holographic eagle flew in and around Grega as he smirked to himself.

“The sky for all I fucking know,” said Grega sadly as he threw up his hands. And as he did the Gasblack 1 did a somersault and landed at his feet. Its head spiraled around in circles and Grega asked sternly,” Now what the fuck are you doin’? You tryin’ to weird me to death?”

“You have won the prize, the gift, the thing that you lacked. And now that it’s time for a winner to rise, I can tell you your answer was correct. So tap on my chest and your prize I’ll submit,” said the Gasblack 1 brightly as it pushed its chest out at Grega. Suddenly a barrel hologram surrounded the two of them and everyone looked on anxiously as Grega smiled.

“Go ahead, Grega, let’s see if he explodes,” said Daserus sarcastically then he kissed Rosemary on the cheek.

“Alright let’s see,” said Grega apprehensively as he smirked and then reached out and touched the Gasblack 1’s chest.

And as he did the chest cavity opened and revealed a stack of hundred dollar bills that numbered 100,000 dollars as well as a black, turquoise, and dark blue steel 3 inch long cell phone like device. The device had the words,” You’ll be amazed at the Jogou maze. And better yet you’ll get lost in its walls, and never ending places that will draw you in and keep you there,” written across the computer screen in white letters. There are 3 red and green buttons on the device marked-good, great, and why not-that have the shape of different animals.

“What’s it say?” asked Pat anxiously as Grega grabbed the device and pulled out the wad of cash.

“Is that real money, Grega?” asked Daserus intently as he eyed the money. Daserus felt dejected seeing as he was nearly broke and could have played the game himself.

“Oh yeah, the rich get much richer. Jesus, just 2 months ago I was flat broke and now I have so much money that this is not even a big deal,” said Grega calmly as he counted the money and then said slyly,”

Well there’s 100,000 dollars here. Does anyone want it?” asked Grega as he looked at everyone.

“I’ll take it if no one wants it,” said Daserus quickly as he tried not to show how badly he needed it.

“Take it, we’re all rich. Enjoy, Daserus,” said Grega as he started to give it to Daserus, but when he reached for the money he pulled it back playfully. Only to smile and give it to him and then Grega said slyly,” Just kiddin’ ya, Daserus.”

“What is that gizmo you’ve got there? Looks like an alien weapon,” said Pat nervously as he didn’t let on how embarrassed Grega was making him feel by not answering his questions in front of Daserus.

“What…oh yeah this little gizmo or what not,” replied Grega slowly as he inspected his prize. “Let’s take a look it says its tickets to some Jogou maze. And there’s some buttons here to push,” said Grega calmly, but Daserus looked at him wide eyed.

“The Jogou maze is the hardest place in New York to get in to. Literally there are 3 year long waiting lists to buy a ticket, and the tickets are incredibly expensive. I’m sorry to cut you off like that, Grega,”

said Daserus apologetically as he secretly wished Grega would give him the Jogou tickets or at least take him with him.

“No, it’s alright, Daserus. I appreciate you giving me the lowdown on all the great info. Well it says here I can take 5 guests, but no pets,” said Grega after pressing the red lion shaped button and reading the computer screen. He calmly pressed the green button and a hologram of a giant warrior with the body of a dragon carrying a large golden sword filled the space in front of Grega. It started flying through a giant electrical storm and then into a massive smoke filled tunnel.

“That is so sick,” said Pat excitedly as he watched the hologram and a thunderous symphony could be heard coming out of the device as the warrior shot into a massive tree and rocketed out of one of its limbs and into an underwater graveyard of yellow statues. Then a voice could be heard that said sharply,”

You were alive when you died, but you find it sits better when knives find your eyes, and your neck feels a shiver. I knew once of an idiot such as you. And he was dumbfounded to see that there’s better and even quite less than the woman I became and you’ll see. So when you race through my maze keep your mind on this refrain,” You’ll never make it to me and this is the game.” Then a dark green faced Jogou the Witch rose up out of a glass of ale on the edge of a swamp. Jogou winked and fire engulfed her. Instantly she disappeared into smoke.

“Now that was sick, Jesus!” said Pat excitedly as he smiled like a little kid. He tried to get everyone pumped up and take the focus off his embarrassment.

“Well, I don’t know what you guys want to do, but I’m totally up for this Jogou maze,” said Grega coyly as he tried to not let on that he was trying to dupe everyone into ditching the Den of Purth. He acted like he was in total joyous shock.

“Yeah fuck Purth, this maze thing looks way better. I’m with Grega on this one, Rosemary,” said Pat sternly as he tried to sway Rosemary but also convince Grega he wasn’t mad that he’d ignored him. Pat hoped that by doing this Grega wouldn’t do it again.

“You’re with him on everything ya burnout!” said Rosemary jokingly as Grega tried not to laugh and Rosemary tried to embarrass Pat a little. Rosemary said begrudgingly,” Alright, Grega, you convict I’ll happily go to this maze shit, but you owe me a fine dinner later.”

“Sure, no of course we’ll swing by McDonalds on the way. I’ll get you a couple of hamburgers and maybe a small fry? Maybe even a small chocolate milk, how’s that sound?” asked Grega sarcastically as he grinned at Rosemary. She laughed and pointed to his crotch while Daserus and Pat laughed.

“Sounds like a classic Grega promise, heavy on the screw you, but I’ll take it ‘cause those burgers are juicy,” said Rosemary sarcastically as she rubbed Daserus’s thigh.

“Alright then, I’ll buy burgers for the whole car, except for Pat who only gets a small fry. I’m just kiddin’ ya, Pat, you don’t mind do ya?” asked Grega sarcastically as he laughed at how embarrassed Pat was, but knew he wouldn’t call him on the slight.

“Whatever, Grega, the same shenanigans as usual,” Pat said sadly as he tried not to sweat. “Still I want 2 small fries or I’ll tell Rosemary about that tuft of hair on your pecker,” said Pat sarcastically then Grega laughed, but Pat felt he had evened the score. Even though Pat wished Grega would just show him some respect so he wouldn’t have too.

“Oh, Pat’s, a bit perturbed and might snap. No look ah, let’s absolutely do this Jogou maze thing.

And if you want we can hit Frenchie’s drive thru on the way?” asked Grega coyly as he felt guilty for

sticking it to Pat, but Grega really didn’t care because of a story Pat had told him about when Pat was young and he punched his mother in the arm one night when she wouldn’t stop shouting and talking at the TV due to her mental illness. And Grega never forgave Pat for this.

There was an awkward silence as Pat fumed, but didn’t he want to snap.

Rosemary wanted Pat to be uncomfortable for a while and this was because she’d knew Pat was a bit of a bastard to her when she was young and she never forgave him for it.

“Yeah, sounds great, but we’ll have to let Den know what we’re doing and give him directions,” said Pat calmly as he told himself it wasn’t a big deal that Grega disrespected him and he was strong enough to take it.

Grega smirked and felt a wash of power and joy come over him that Pat had let him emasculate him again.

“It’s on West 33rd at the Devias hotel. It’s in the basement and goes literally for 50 miles under the city. My father used to work there in crowd control a long time ago,” said Daserus calmly as he felt a rush of relief. Daserus knew what Grega was doing and knew that Pat had let it go, but he also knew that Pat was weak and could be manipulated easily.

“Really, that’s pretty cool, but why would you need crowd control at a maze?” asked Rosemary intently as she squinted at Daserus. Then Rosemary peeked over at Pat to see if he was still pissed off.

She saw that he was and looked back at Daserus quickly.

“Yeah why would you need that, Daserus? I would think it’d be just another attraction, I could be wrong though,” said Grega calmly as he tried not to look at Pat who was nervously breathing. Grega knew he’d burst out laughing if he looked at Pat and was secretly ecstatic at how pissed Pat was.

“You are actually, no what the Jogou is, is the most amazing place in town. I can’t tell you what it’s all about, because I don’t want to ruin it. And quite frankly I don’t know,” said Daserus jokingly as he saw Pat quickly laugh as he tried to let out some of his anger. Daserus and everyone laughed loudly pretending it was at what Daserus had said, but knowing it was at Pat and then Daserus said calmly,” No, we’ll have the time of our lives. The only downside is we can easily get separated from one another, so we’ll have to stay close or someone will get lost in The Maze!”

Everyone laughed, but they were secretly laughing at Pat and had hoped for a good joke so they could explode. What they didn’t realize was, is that Pat knew what was happening, but laughed anyway.

He didn’t want to let on because he thought they were idiots.

“Oh boy that was funny. You’re not still pissed are ya, Pat?” asked Grega coyly as he glanced at Pat.

He knew he could use the laughter as a way to manipulate Pat into thinking he was his friend and that he was actually worried when Grega just didn’t want Pat to explode and ruin their good time.

“No, Grega, wait what do you mean?” asked Pat happily as Grega caught him off guard, but then he realized what Grega was doing and tried not to get angry.

“Oh I was just worried you were taking my jokes seriously. When actually I love ya and I was just kidding. You know that right?” asked Grega coyly and in a sincere voice as he tried to convince Pat he was his friend, but knowing he wished bad things would happen to him and only hung out with him because he liked making fun of Pat.

“Yeah I know, Grega, I just get annoyed with you sometimes. I love ya too. Hey you need to tell Den what’s happening,” said Pat quickly as he felt relieved that Grega had apologized. Pat rubbed the back of his head while Grega started text messaging Den about what was going on.

Inside the Abe Dasiom Den sat there dancing back and forth to the song,” Like a Rolling Believer,”

by The Best Depression with the windows open and a smile on his face.

The Best Depression, are a Canadian rock band who hail from Vancouver. They are a 10 piece band that includes a 5 piece string section of former attractive female and male prostitutes. The bass player Peter P. Plast was a ruthless police detective before joining the group, but Peter gave up his profession after getting caught stealing 750 pounds of marijuana, a brick of cocaine, and 550,000 dollars from the evidence locker-although it was never proven. After his resignation he decided he’d been on the wrong side of the law for too long. He started selling pot out of his summer home, which is where he met his bandmates, as they were all customers first. Over the 3 years since the band’s inception, they’ve had 15

number one hits in Canada and sold over 70 tons of pot. They travel from city to city keeping the marijuana in a fake bottom in their tour bus.

“What is this?” asked Den as he felt his cell phone shake and then pulled it out and read Grega’s message. Den smiled and moved up to the front of the cab and tapped the driver on the shoulder and said warmly,” Hey we’re heading to the Jogou maze instead. I just got the message ok great.”

Den sat back in his seat and started dancing again as he gyrated his wrists and shook awkwardly.

They rode for a few minutes and then came to the Devias hotel. It is shaped like a derby hat, but has a pair of red eyes cut into the top that go clean through and house a massive sandy bottom pool. The hotel itself is dark blue in color with dozens of different holograms generated by the guest’s rooms. The holograms show their mood by using a happy animals like a dog or they’d put holograms of themselves floating outside the room to let friends and family know where they are. The base of the hotel has a large check-in in a hangar bay and it is filled with a lush garden and several statues of Wexor and the hotel’s owner Pud Smoda.

Pud Smoda was one of only a few humans that the Doramocs saw as an equal. They did because of his immense size and stature at 7’9” and 657 pounds, but also because he told very elaborate stories and they took that to mean he was very wise. He always told one story about when he was in a plane that was hurling towards a grove of trees after both engines had gone out. Everyone on board was screaming for

their lives except for Pud. Pud calmly ate some potato salad and watched the ground getting closer out the window. Then as the plane neared the treetops, Pud calmly got up out of his seat and walked over to the hatch and he burst it open with his shoulder and air rushed in. He waited for a moment, then smiled to a female stewardess and jumped out. He just missed the left engine with his head and crashed into a large leafy tree. The tree cushioned his fall enough that he was uninjured. Then he simply climbed down out of the tree and calmly watched the plane burst into flames. The story was a complete lie, but Pud found the strength and fortitude to tell it to the Doramocs again and again like it was the truth.

The 2 Dasioms flew into the hangar bay at Devias. Then they sojourned into a large Pud shaped stall that had a bridge made from mahogany and red marble that led into the hotel just as you exited the Taxicab. There was also a trio of anti-gravity scooters set up on either side of the bridge that you caould rent called Thams.

The Thams are 2 person black and red lined t-shaped crafts. They have comfortable tan leather chairs set up in a row with a steering wheel in the front. They also have bottles of beer and soda like Pepsi and Coke in the sides that you got for free when you rented them. They have little laser pistols on the fronts they use to buy items in storefronts by just aiming at them.

Everyone exited the Dasioms and Grega gave the driver a thousand dollar tip. Then they casually walked onto the bridge.

“Hey Brothers and Sisters of the revolution,” said Den jokingly as he raised both his arms above his head. “Are there stars in my eyes?” asked Den jokingly in a stoner’s voice as he walked really bowlegged over to everyone and slid his sunglasses from side to side and then up and down.

“It’s just shit, Den, been there for years,” joked Grega as he checked his wallet. “Not to mention your brains are shit all the way through,” said Grega jokingly and in a stern over dramatic deep voice, as he rubbed Den’s shoulders and examined his head.

“It happened on that trip to Mexico. I asked the waiter for ribs, and he thought I said shit. A second later he was boring a hole in my forehead. What’s your excuse, Grega?” asked Den sarcastically as Grega laughed loudly and tried to think of a better joke than Den, as then they walked towards the Thams.

“My mother used me as a basketball when I was young. Up and down the court over and over shot after shot. It’s a wonder I can even speak, it’s a wonder I can even smell your fart scent cologne, but I can. Jesus wipe that ass already!” said Grega sarcastically as he grinned and Den laughed and smelt his armpits quickly.

Rosemary, Daserus, Pat, and Amo were checking out the Thams.

“Hey, Grega, stop strokin’ Den’s idiot ego and come over here and help me pick a scooter. I need your expert tutelage,” said Amo sternly as she wanted some attention and felt she was being neglected.

Grega shook his head and shrugged his shoulders. He grabbed Den and they made their way over to the Thams.

“She tells me how it is,” said Grega playfully then he walked over to the Thams and saw Amo scowling at him. She smiled and tapped the seat behind her.

“Alright, Grega, let’s take a ride and see the alleged maze in question,” said Amo warmly as Grega sat down behind her with his legs straddling her. He worried someone might make a joke.

“Boy, Grega, you really know how to be a woman’s bitch! Look at him, Pat, he lost his pecker and sack in the cab!” said Rosemary jokingly as she burst out laughing and everyone else laughed.

Grega felt really embarrassed and tried to act like it wasn’t a big deal, but the more they laughed the more it bothered him and then he tapped Amo on the shoulder.

“Hey, I want to drive, Amo? Just don’t make a big deal out of it,” asked Grega anxiously as he got off the Thams. Amo looked at him wide-eyed and she decided not to make a fuss, because she could see he was pissed so she just got off the Thams.

They all got on their Thams and Amo asked nervously,” Do I get to talk now, Grega, or are you still pissed at me?”

“Amo, Jesus, just let it go already. Isn’t it enough that you embarrassed me in front of everyone?”

asked Grega sharply then he started to drive across the bridge at full speed. He felt like shouting at Amo but fought to hold it together.

Meanwhile Amo felt pissed at Grega, but knew she couldn’t do better than him. She thought that if she dumped him she’d have to go back to Portland and she didn’t want too so she bit her tongue.

They raced through a big python statue and could see a glowing blue neon sign that read,” Jogou Maze to the right.” They all flew right down a spiraling tunnel that had Pud’s face and image all over it.

They passed through a holographic waterfall and emerged in a colossal room. The room had thousands of mountains, sand cities, and robot filled lounges among many other types of rooms and outdoor settings. It went off in every direction and even several dozen stories into the ground. There was a dark blue fake sun set up above the room flanked by red holographic storm clouds. They blanketed the room in an eerie warm blue sunlight. The outer walls of the room had hundreds of shops, bars, and hotel suites set up so you could play the maze or simply watch others as well as apartments with tunnels to the surface so they could get in and out easily. There were anti-gravity suits of armor that many people were using to get an overview of the maze. Many visitors were also using it as an amusement ride as they soared in and around the black and red mountain range.

At the start of the Jogou there is a massive orange marble Buda statue that has a black leather chair perched on it, as well as a golden football slash eagle’s head shaped helmet. It has glowing red eyes and every person has to put them on before entering the maze (they are called the Himra).

What the Himra did is imprint a random map for each person that leads to different prizes in the maze or different foibles and challenges. There is only one person out of 1 million that will be lucky enough to get the actual map to the Jogou Witch. And that same person will get hundreds of prizes along the way that includes a key that unlocks a door to the,” Friends Again Club,” which is New York’s secret society. It has many celebrities and billionaires going in and out of there all the time. Membership brings with it a permanent get out of jail free card. That meant you could literally kill someone and face no repercussions. It also carries with it seats at every nice restaurant and theater and they are lavish and always right next to the stage, as well as being filled with drugs and alcohol. Once you were a member you could never leave. Even after death your children have to maintain your personal locker and hot tub area or if they didn’t face a severe tongue lashing or even a good hard punch in the mouth for everyday they neglected to do the maintenance.

Everyone was standing in line waiting to put on the Himra and start their trip through the Jogo while the band The Best Depression played inside a holographic ocean blue bubble that made them look amazing.

“Well I say after all this fun stuff we dig up some graves and shake down some homeless? Who’s up for that ah?” asked Grega sarcastically as he smiled and tried to trick everyone into thinking he was happy again, but all the while he was still pissed at them. They all laughed loudly looked for a drink.

“I’m always up for that, but why do you want to go to Pat’s parent’s house?” asked Rosemary sarcastically as she slapped Pat’s butt with her hand. Everyone laughed and Grega only smiled because he wanted Pat to think everything was cool, but he was just waiting to stick it to him.

Grega believed he had earned the right to slight and make fun of all of them, because he bought them many things. And if they didn’t want to be embarrassed they shouldn’t have asked him to buy them things and be fucking leeches. He also thought that women were evil and should be treated poorly. He thought

this because his high school girlfriend (Debby Yosling) cheated on him and broke his heart. After that he never let any woman get too close to him again.

“Oh really, Rosemary, we’ll see if Ma makes you struddle again. I have a feelin’ it’s road apple sandwiches for the likes of you,” said Pat playfully and sarcastically as he moved up in front of Grega in line. Grega pretended not to notice because he wasn’t sure about what would happen when he made a point to say no. Grega was still trying to convince everyone he was happy again.

“Oh no, what have I done. Please don’t tell her, Pat, I need that struddle and I needs it bad,” pleaded Rosemary as she rubbed Pat’s shoulder. Daserus was being tugged forward by her and he grinned as he felt embarrassed for her. It embarrassed Daserus the way she was acting making him wonder if she was too childish for their relationship to work.

“I won’t tell her, but she’ll know. Ma always does,” said Pat slyly as he stepped up to the Buda throne and then sat down. An old man with a mountain of thick stark white hair started putting the Himra on Pat’s head. The Himra glowed bright red and shot the imprint of the map into Pat’s brain. Instantly Pat took off the helmet and said sarcastically,” Pie times of 8 million and 4 equals half the square root of x! Plus wine and body shots while said g-string is lodged in yonder butt cheeks. I’m officially the smartest person among smart people who live on my street. Dog save the Queen from eating my poundcake!”

Grega stepped up quickly and used the Himra.

“I’d like to pound your cake, Daserus. Let’s go find a bedroom somewhere in the maze and remember how to take off our clothes,” said Rosemary playfully as she rubbed Daserus’s crotch. A moment later she French kissed Daserus.

Den went up after Grega and before long they were all imprinted with their maps.

“Alright well I’ll be heading this DIE-REC-TION,” said Den jokingly as he started for a large whiskey bar on the right that looked like the head of a lion. He smiled from ear to ear and Rosemary and Amo laughed.

“My map says go left, what does yours say, Pat?” asked Grega happily as he hugged Amo and forced a smile. All this while Pat looked around at the 25 different starting mahogany doors, with each having a name over it like,” Sam’s Clam,” or,” The Timeless Clock.”

“My map says Gifted Idiot a bit of type casting I surmise,” said Pat jokingly as he looked around at all the different doors. He hoped he’d have one of his friends to come with him, but not Grega.

“I surmise that you’re sure miserly. Well aren’t we all geniuses like a dumb woman once said. I’m just joking don’t lose it, Amo,” said Grega half jokingly as he just didn’t want to admit he was serious.

Also, he hoped he could get away from Pat for awhile, but didn’t want him to know it.

“Well in that case, all seriousness aside my map says the same thing as Pat’s so…,” said Amo brightly as she looked at Grega and smirked and he looked back at her with his jaw dropped.

“Amo, Babycakes, how could this be twoo?” asked Grega in a little kid’s voice and Amo laughed while Pat looked on in disgust.

“Hey, Grega, grow a pair would ya, there’s me present,” said Pat jokingly in a stern voice as he felt uncomfortable at Grega’s show of affection. Pat wondered if he really had to talk like a child to get a woman to like him while Grega laughed loudly with Amo.

“Is all this baby talk makin’ wittle Patipo feel uncomfortaboo? Well Patipo needs himself a huggy hug,” said Grega in a kid’s voice as he walked over to Pat with his arms outstretched. And as he went to hug Pat he was having none of it and started for the Gifted Idiot doorway as Grega laughed.

“Alright I’ll call you later, Grega, and tell you how Pat and I made out,” said Amo brightly as she grinned at Grega and then kissed him.

“What am I supposed to do ‘til then? I could get lost, it’s a maze in there,” asked Grega as Amo hurried after Pat. They all had a brief laugh and then Rosemary looked at Grega and smirked and Grega asked,” Why are you smirking? Did I forget my rubber tooth and there’s a hole in my smile?”

“Grega, I want to get started on the maze, we could win something good. Let’s hit it already,” said Rosemary anxiously as Daserus smiled and shrugged his shoulders at Grega. Grega looked vacantly back at him.

“It’s much to my chagrin, Rosemary, that I have to tell you there’s no guarantee we will win anything. We could, but you never know,” said Daserus slyly as he rubbed Rosemary’s back and she pouted back at him.

Pat and Amo were just nearing the door to Gifted Idiot and as they stepped onto the mauve door shaped doormat, a hologram of Pud Smoda appeared and shouted,” Who the fuck are you?! What the fuck are you Shitheads doing on my porch?! I’ll bash your heads in with a steel 5 wood!”

“What’s going on, Pat?” asked Amo in shock and disbelief as she eyed Pud’s snarling face. Amo smiled slightly and Pat just shook his head.

“Do you think I’ll tolerate you bastard kids stealing my hard apples again?! Well do ya?! Aren’t you two what graves are made for?!” shouted Pud as he glared at Pat and then started flailing his holographic fists at Pat’s head. Pat instinctively ducked.

Pat realized how dumb it was to duck a hologram and just stood there calmly and smiled. Then the door flung open and Amo said quickly,” Let’s hurry, Pat, we don’t want to miss anything.”

Amo walked through the hologram of Pud pulling on Pat’s hand and as they were about to grab the door handle the door shot straight down into the ground. Behind the door there was a grassy meadow filled with dozens of gold and mahogany chests. And oddly there were little people sitting on top of the chests drinking tiny bottles of beer. There were also several statues of Jogou the Witch set up around the meadow as well as a large red marble statue of Homseli that shows him drinking from a man’s skull.

Homseli was a second wave religious leader that rose up after the invasion. There were 50 of these said prophets with Homseli the most prominent and most influential. He started writing speeches and giving them in Monument Square in Portland Maine. The most famous was the speech later called,” The Resistance of Thought,” that included the paragraph,” I died today, twice in the dew of morning and another time at my second meal. Then it dawned on me that only my many deaths were life at all. And the first two were at the hands of strong words from a friend over the loss of faith in the all and enormous purity of God’s vengeful plan for those who desire to corrupt and destroy people like me. It was these deaths that led to the third death at the hands of my father as he felt I’d let him down by not carrying more of his traits with me in my own personality. This death especially kills me over and over again. Even though I know it is suicide to my true self reaching out to be new and original.”

“Alright, Amo, queen of a names, what should we do in this room? My map tells me to seek out a will of diminutive stature. I thought of you first,” said Pat jokingly as he and Amo walked up a path towards the treasure chests. Pat felt joy and relief wash over him to have some time away from Grega and with Amo.

“Fuck you king of the P names. I’ve slept with better lays at the bus station,” said Amo sarcastically as she tried not to smile, but couldn’t help it when Pat nudged her.

“That was you, you’re greyhound Amo the ultimate rim job? I’ve been hearin’ about you For Years!

Is it still a six pack a lay or is it smokes too?” asked Pat sarcastically as Amo stared at him and grinned.

She thought how handsome he looked when he kidded around with her.

Then Bobby Lud-a blonde haired and blue eyed black sweater wearing little person-jumped up and down on the treasure chest near Pat and Bobby said excitedly,” I have a gift for you, if you is who is true.

Just check inside me chest and soon you’ll have the best, but I won’t tell you what.

Pat and Amo chuckled and looked at Bobby who was smiling and Pat said happily,” Works for me, I could use a new hat for me head.”

Bobby jumped off the side of the chest and Pat went up to the green and red computer screen on its lock and pressed in the black finger shaped button. Then, feeling emboldened, Pat started telling himself it wasn’t a big deal if he won that way he wouldn’t get blindsided if he didn’t get a good gift. While Amo could barely contain herself as she secretly hoped it was a large sum they could easily split.

“Well now what?” asked Pat anxiously as the chest didn’t open, but just as he gave up it sprung open and revealed a pair of leather burlap sacks and a trio of 75,000 dollar stacks of hundred dollar bills and Pat shouted ,” Look at all that loot, Amo, we’re rich for fuck’s sake!”

“Jesus, Pat, we don’t need to bum money off Grega anymore! Yes, I knew you were good luck come here,” said Amo excitedly then Pat looked over at her. She grabbed him and French kissed him hard and then said in a sultry voice,” And I have a feeling you’re a great Fuck.”

“That’s right, but it could end my friendship with Grega. So let’s just keep it on the backburner for a while, as we figure this out. But that said, Amo, I have strong feelings for you,” said Pat sincerely as his thoughts raced. He tried to reckon with ending his friendship with Grega, but knew maybe it was time.

“I’m madly in love with you, Pat, alright there I said it. And that friend of yours Grega is a bastard who makes fun of you when you’re not around. And he always talks about you behind your back. I know you think he’s your friend, but he’s not. And I could be the best friend you ever had, I mean it, Pat,” said Amo honestly as she teared up a little and wished Pat could say he loved her.

“Amo, I love you,” said Pat warmly and then Amo kissed him before he could say another word. Pat said happily,” Ok look if I lose my friend I don’t care. I’m probably better off without him. And with this money here we could go a long time, which reminds me what’s in those sacks?” asked Pat softly then he reached in and pulled out a few more sacks from the chest.

He opened one and inside there was a pile of gold and platinum and diamond studded jewelry that included a huge pink diamond necklace. The jewelry was worth over 115 million dollars. Amo knew it was valuable instantly as she had worked at a DeBeers two years ago.

“Holy shit, Pat, do you have any idea how valuable all that jewelry is? That ring your holding alone is worth 20 million. Pat, we don’t need Grega or his shit again. We are stylin’,” said Amo in disbelief as Pat didn’t know what to say, as he held a fist full of jewelry up and felt lightheaded.

Pat looked at Bobby who was smiling and just shook his head. Then Pat put the jewelry back and said nervously,” Boy this is a great day. We might as well see what’s in the other sack.”

“I hope its movie tickets then we’d be rich. And, they have popcorn too,” said Amo sarcastically as Pat reached in the bag and pulled out a dark brown box. The box had golden inlays in the design of a Rhino with red eyes and the words,” You died today and we mourned the loss of your sanity and reason, but we’re crazy about you,” written beneath the Rhino in ivory letters. Amo looked at it quizzically, smiled slightly and asked anxiously,” What is it, Pat, more jewelry?”

“I don’t know, let’s look inside,” said Pat anxiously as he fumbled with the front and looked for a latch. As he did his thumb pressed in the word,” Crazy” and the box slowly opened revealing a tiny leather book, and a silver square grip, as well as a round key that had the words,” Friends Again Club,”

written across the front of the key.

The little book had the words,” In case of emergency give up, you’re not a person that helps, but we are,” written along the edges in red velvety lettering, as well as a silhouette of Bathmasu Doepo.

Bathmasu Doepo is the original leader and creator of the,” Friends Again Club.” He has sunk all of his oil money into creating a club that is above the law and also inclusive. What the last part meant was that there were 2 ways in. 1. A life of privilege where you bought your way in or 2.by sheer happenstance where you were in the right place at the right time and you did something more than you ever had before.

Bathmasu believed that anyone could be rich, but not everyone could be lucky. He felt he was lucky in finding an oil well on his land in Texas. It was on a property he and his wife had just bought when they were still in their teens. That stroke of luck combined with his business sense allowed him to branch out.

Soon he and his wife bought the oil rights to all the neighboring properties and the whole county. In less than 5 years he never cared about money again. Then he started ratcheting up his efforts to collect intelligence on powerful politicians and other rich people. He needed this so he could use that as leverage later on in life. This was to assure the members of the club that they have certain latitudes so to speak.

Then the fun started in earnest. To date the 3,000 members around the world are the only truly powerful people outside of the Doramocs who know anything of the club.

“It’s a key, but to what, Pat?” asked Amo intently as she held the 5 inch key in her hand. Pat read through the book that listed the many perks and locations of club offices.

“It says here whether I know it or not or want it or not, I just joined the Friends Again Club! And I have a new lease on life that is unequaled by even many of the most powerful. It also says I have to go to 135 Wall Street and attend my first meet and greet within 48 hours hmm. Who am I meeting?” asked Pat softly as he eyed the book.

“Someone amazing, Pat, you will be surprised at what you see. The riches you have are just a drop in the bucket of the pleasures you’ll see. But don’t quit now, there is much to enjoy and many more gifts on your way to the ending,” said Bobby brightly then he shook his hands in front of his face and did a backflip. Pat and Amo looked on in wonderment.

Each of them felt an unbelievable joy at what they had just had happen to them.

“Well let’s keep going, Amo. There might be even better gifts along the way,” said Pat brightly and then he kissed Amo good and hard. Pat thought how lucky he was to have her.

“Oh, Pat, we’ve won already. Well my map tells me we go through the meadow and up to an elderly woman who has a story to tell, so let’s hit it,” said Amo warmly as she grabbed Pat’s hand and they started off into the maze.

Off In a Different Part of the Maze

Meanwhile Den, Rosemary, Grega, and Daserus were bellying up to the bar and they were drinking Natural Lights and eating out of brown wooden baskets of shrimp, onion rings, and lobster tails. They also had side orders of whipped potatoes with bacon bits in them that were covered with thick country gravy, as well as banana splits and chocolate pudding.

The bar itself is shaped like a spaceship and has dozens of brown leather floating recliners set up facing out a continuous picture window that looks out over the maze. They also have all the sports games and movie channels projected on the same very windows wherever you wanted them. Each of the chairs use voice activated menus and a robotic red waitress to bring your order within less than a minute. There are several statues of Mornag Thebas in the center of the bar surrounding the kitchen that were hidden behind a black marble wall that is covered with pictures of famous people.

Mornag Thebas was a Doramoc general renowned for being the-Sailor of the Universe-as he trekked ever farter into the void in search of new religions and alien prophets. He felt an unbelievable urge to find the son of God that could shed light on the questions he could never get concrete answers for like,” Where was I before I existed?” He found a prophet by the name of Pogon Phati on the world of Resis. And he asked him that very question to which Pogon replied calmly,” You were in a realm of pure insanity and unspeakable horror. And it lacked the sense of touch, but had an even more powerful sense of a person’s mental pain called Tombasens. This Tombasens’ caused you to be on a rollercoaster of emotions from

first breath to last. It wasn’t long before you prayed for enlightenment and you were given your life here.”

Mornag found that the farther he went out into space the farther there was to go. And when many of his questions were finally answered he missed not knowing. And he came up with a final question,” If I am the first person like me that’s ever been, then how can I ever feel whole if I have no chance of ever finding an equal?” And another prophet replied,” All eggs are different, but all eggs are eggs.”

“Alright, Den, so what do you think about the two of us sharing a coffin when we kick it? I only ask

‘cause I thought about doin’ you in,” asked Grega sarcastically as he ate his onion rings and thought about Pat. He wondered if he was trying to hit on Amo, but wasn’t threatened.

“Oh really, is that the way of it. Well in that case I don’t want your smelly feet in my face. I say we get a coffin that’s double wide and built for speed. I needs me breathin’ sleep,” said Den sarcastically as he continued to drink, while Grega laughed as they watched the 5th inning of the Red Sox Phillies game on the window-with Terponic coming up to bat.

“Then sleep you shall have, my Liege. I will decree that you and all my loyal subjects will be given large rations of mead and baskets of baked bread. Then you will have double wide coffins to die like the best of us!” said Grega sarcastically in a pompous voice as he lifted the basket of bread up to Den’s face.

Den sucked in the steam from it as Rosemary and Daserus laughed loudly at this. Grega grinned and thought how much smarter than Den he was and he felt full of pride.

“Then bring poor Den more of said mead, and be not skimpy on the size of said receptacle. For Den is in dire need, Your Royal Highness and Lowness, of a respite in your court of gold. On the island of armpit if you wish it and such,” said Den jokingly as he grinned slightly and his eyes glazed over while he felt Grega was making him feel a bit dumb. Even though he liked the humor so he let it slide and Grega laughed heartedly and patted Den on the back.

Daserus and Rosemary were howling with laughter.

“What about us, Your Royal Pain In Assness, where’s our such on the island of armpit? I thought we were loyal and geography is not my favorite subject! I need mead and spools of thread to make a hat for my dumb head! Save me, Me Majesty Of Dirty Backside, from the oppression of being pushed down by a large man after lunch,” said Rosemary sarcastically as she breezed around the room. “Oh let the bird feather soup flow like insults at a Catholic Priest’s circumcision. Oh to be soup and oh does it get soupy in pots of liquid,” said Rosemary sarcastically as she raised her left hand high and sat forward. She looked at Grega and saw he was laughing with a serious face. Daserus was nearly choking from laughter and he realized he liked Rosemary’s sense of humor.

“And I, Lord Of Half Eaten Mustache, I too does wish to be soup. And to be buried in cow’s urine while my body is hurled off a rocky cliff. Because this was my dream of great dreamdom, as a smaller version of myself, when I was less obnoxious and more forgiving of road apple I have emerged. Please bequeath me thine endless riches of horse hair sweaters and possum helmets. This and only this is this,”

said Daserus sarcastically as he eyed the last onion ring. Daserus thought that Grega ate very loudly and laughed like a bastard, but liked that he was gregarious.

Rosemary continued to laugh even after Daserus was done talking as did Den. Then Rosemary threw a loaf of bread out of a hole in the window in front of her. The loaf hit a young boy in the maze right square in the face. This caused everyone to laugh even harder.

Then after a few minutes of telling jokes Grega ordered massages for everyone. Suddenly 4

masseuses came and started rubbing everyone’s sore muscles.

Out in the Maze

Pat and Amo had already made it to the elderly woman (and she was named Besspo). Besspo did have a young face that was very beautiful and she had a small well defined nose, ocean blue eyes, and a mane of long flowing white hair. She had on a red velvety dress and a pair of dark brown boots that have

the words,” Utopia is hard to find, 4 lefts and a right and your there,” written across the toe of one shoe.

And on the other it had the words,” Don’t be a party poop, party with soap instead,” written across the toe of the shoe. She has a Shiatsu white dog sitting on her lap as she smiles at Pat and Amo.

“The story of right and wrong goes like this. A fool came upon a pile of money sitting at the base of a grassy hill. He exclaimed, my dreams have been answered thank you powers that be! Then when he looked down to grab the money it was gone and he heard God say you thanked the wrong person. So he shouted out, GOD you are a bastard! Then he looked down and saw the money at his feet. And when he reached down to grab it, it turned into a ball of cow manure and God shouted,” You’re right, but at least I’m rich!” said Besspo slyly then Amo and Pat laughed and couldn’t think of what to ask her.

“That was a great story, Besspo, are there any gifts for us here?” asked Amo warmly as she looked at Besspo who was smiling from ear to ear. Amo wondered if Besspo was crazy.

Besspo stood up and beneath her sat a large blue backpack that had the words,” I run from movement,” written along the side of it.

“This is for you, and it was worth the wait I assure you,” said Besspo warmly as she lifted up the backpack and handed it to Amo who smiled back at her.

“Thank you, Besspo, let’s have a look maybe it’s more money or jewels, let’s hope,” said Amo nervously as she opened the top of the backpack. Amo saw 5 sets of keys and a dozen gold bars, as well as a red booklet with a black leather cover that had the words,” The world will envy your oyster,” written across the cover in the shape of an eagle.

“What a hall, those gold bars are worth a fortune, Amo! What are the keys too?” asked Pat excitedly as he picked up one of the gold bars and it was heavier than he thought.

“It says we just won a boat, 2 houses, 2 cars, and a new lease on life! The houses are in New York City and Bar Harbor Maine, right on the ocean! Holy shit, Pat, we are set for life, can you believe it?”

asked Amo excitedly as she became flush and sweaty.

This while Pat could barely stand up as the weight of the situation hit him hard and he started sweating.

“Jesus, Amo, our whole future just became that rosy I’d heard tell of. Boy I can’t believe it. Besspo, are there more gifts for us in the maze or is this it?” asked Pat anxiously as his thoughts raced and then he wiped the sweat from his forehead with his shirt sleeve.

Pat looked at Amo who was grinning back at him and she felt overjoyed.

“There are a few, but the maze doesn’t have an end. As long as you want to follow your map there will be gifts. My advice to you is to get the next gift in that cave over there, to help you carry them,” said Besspo happily as she pointed to a small cave set into the ground that was shaped like a gorilla’s head.

“I say we keep going for awhile, Pat. We’ll never get a chance like this ever again for fuck’s sake,”

said Amo sternly and Pat quickly nodded (he was just as excited as she was).

They walked over to the cave and went inside. Inside the cave there was a vintage Buick LeSabre anti-gravity car that had been restored perfectly and was emerald green in color. It also had keys in a small leather case on the hood with the words,” You drive it, you own it,” written around the case.

The cave itself was filled with old copies of Rolling Stone magazine from back before the Doramocs destroyed the magazine saying it was,” Fucking faggot shit.” The Doramocs believed homosexuality was amoral. They also believed all gays should be killed. And if you knew one and didn’t and they found out about it, then you were killed as well as one member of your family, and they called it,” The Free Soul Law.”

“Hey, Amo, we’ve got transportation, nice!” said Pat enthusiastically as he rubbed the hood of the car and Amo laughed.

“Then let’s transpo and leave the -tation for later,” said Amo slyly then they got in the car and drove off into the maze at lightning speed.

Back at the Bar

A few hours later everyone was drunk off their asses and eating large meatball and cheese Subway pizza all this while the baseball game ended with a fly ball to Jay Hayweird. Jay ran full speed towards the centerfield wall with his eye on the ball, but just as he was about to catch it he lost it in the sun. The ball missed his glove and hit him directly in the eye as he smashed headlong into the wall and broke his neck and shoulder.

“Oh Jesus, not again poor Jay,” said Den as he spoke in between sips. “Well it had to happen he’s too dumb for his own good. Who’s drivin’ us home, you drinker of belly shots, or you drinker of rum and cokes?” asked Den drunkenly and jokingly as he fell out of his seat. Everyone laughed and then Den said drunkenly and jokingly,” It’s alright I’m just dying slowly call Ma, tell her I miss her crumb cake.”

“We can’t go yet, Den, my snookums and Pat aren’t back yet. So you’ll just have to man up and help me eat this pizza and gooey cheese,” said Grega slyly as he ate a large slice of pizza.

Rosemary and Daserus were kissing softly behind them all.

“Fine, Grega, I’ll wait, but only if I can leave right now,” said Den sarcastically as he stood up and squinted as he looked out over the maze. Den saw a dark green Buick LeSabre heading towards the bar.

He double-taked it and then asked nervously,” Hey there’s some nutjob headin’ right towards the bar, should I have gone to church as a child?”

“What, what the fuck is that guy doin’? Jesus, he might crash right into us,” said Grega anxiously as the Buick sped right at the bar.

The Buick got within 10 feet and slammed on the brakes and did a power slide. Pat and Amo waved out the driver’s side window of the Buick.

“What’d ya think we were gonna hit ya?” asked Pat happily and jokingly as Amo rubbed his thigh and smiled. While they each felt Grega could flip out so they had to make him happy before telling him about their relationship.

“I don’t know I’m too drunk to be thinking clearly. Did you guys win anything in the maze?” asked Grega happily as he smiled from ear to ear and suspected nothing.

Rosemary and Daserus looked at the Buick and grinned hoping they’d won something.

“We won everything wait ‘til you see it all! Why don’t you meet us down on the first floor and we’ll show you,” said Amo implying a question as she forced a smile and started to get nervous as did Pat.

“We’ll see you on the flipside or yeah the ground. But don’t think we’re sharin’ our pie with ya, it’s taken!” yelled Den happily and drunkenly as he stumbled up to the window. He fell out the window and fell down 2 stories onto a large multi-colored beanbag chair and wasn’t even hurt.

“Jesus Christ, did that just happen? Fuck I tried to grab him,” asked Grega in disbelief and shock as he looked down at Den and felt nauseous knowing he could have easily died. Suddenly he felt a strong sense of fear grip him, as he rubbed his head and looked down at Den.

Den rolled over and raised his thumbs up sign and started laughing.

“It’s alright, Grega, it wasn’t your fault. He’s hammered for fuck’s sake. At least he’s safe let’s head down and talk to Amo and Pat, c’mon,” said Rosemary calmly as she gently grabbed Grega’s arm. He looked pale and Daserus looked on nervously knowing what could have just happened.

They made their way down to the ground floor and Pat had parked the Buick next to Den (who was taking a piss against the beanbag).

“Hey, Den, did you spring a leak?” asked Pat jokingly as he gave Den a push causing him to piss on the beanbag chair and laugh.

“It weren’t me, it were me love-knob. I can’t help it the Naty tasted too sweet awoo!” said Den jokingly as he swayed back and forth and then started humming the song“, Sweet home Alabama.”

Grega looked at Amo and Pat holding hands and knew something was up.

“You two didn’t do anything stupid out there did ya?” asked Grega sternly as he felt angry and thought the worst.

“Grega, it’s over, it’s been over for awhile now. I’ll just say it…I’m in love with Pat. He treats me like the woman I am, and you treat me like a possession. So that’s it, it’s over,” said Amo calmly as she looked at Pat who was looking stolidly back at her. Then she looked at Grega who was about to burst with anger, as he felt incredibly betrayed and clenched his fist as his face turned red.

“You fucking Pig Bitch!,” snarled Grega as he glared at Amo. “I gave you everything you ever wanted! Do you really think you can fuck my friend and I’m gonna give you another damn cent, forget it?!” shouted Grega as he glared at Amo and Pat. Rosemary held him back and a small crowd of people were watching in shock.

“I don’t need your money anymore, Grega, or any of the conditions you put on me for taking it.

Remember you’re the one who has to control everyone, not me! And by the way Pat and I are rich now.

We hit it big in the maze, and that car right there is filled with over 15 billion dollars in prizes! So tough shit I’m over you,” said Amo sharply as she smirked and rubbed Pat’s chest. Rosemary and Daserus held Grega back who was about to punch Pat right in the mouth.

“She ain’t kiddin’, look at all this moola. Boy I wish we were better friends I’d ask for a loan,” said Den jokingly as he looked in the backseat of the Buick and saw a pile of gold coins, a Picasso painting, and Egyptian artifacts among other things in a duffle bag filled with Kennedy bonds.

Grega looked at Den and saw that it was true and felt embarrassed that Pat had finally one upped him. Grega thought about how dumb he was to let Amo go with Pat alone. Then he stopped trying to get to Pat and realized he didn’t love Amo he had just been with her because it was easy.

“Alright fine, you want Pat, Amo, then good luck,” said Grega sharply as he rubbed his fist. “I don’t even care I never loved you anyway I just thought you were hot. And, Pat, I can’t fault you, you just haven’t had that many girlfriends, but I gotta know if we’re still friends. Because you and I were great friends for a lot of years and that has a lot of value to me. So which is it, Pat?” asked Grega sincerely as he stared at Pat. Grega felt like either way it didn’t matter, because he didn’t really care that much about Pat he just needed someone to make fun of. Pat looked at Amo and she nodded yes, as she knew Pat needed him too. Pat felt conflicted, but he knew he could always ditch Grega if he tried anything, because now he was rich.

“We’re still friends, Grega, but I don’t want Amo catching any flack because she chose me. She’s just following her heart, as am I,” said Pat honestly as he felt torn and wasn’t sure he was ready to break away from Grega. Pat rubbed Amo’s forehead as she smiled up at him and mouthed the words,” I love you,” and Pat smiled at this and kissed her softly.

“You don’t have to worry about a thing, Pat, I’m over it. How much stuff did you get in the maze anyway?” asked Grega as he hugged Pat and then said,” I love ya Man, it’s alright.”

“I love you too, Grega. We ah…we got a ton of stuff the whole trunk’s full of leather jackets, silk sheets, sunglasses, even a massive holographic TV emitter. It’ll be fun to put that bad Larry to work,” said Pat as he and Grega walked over to the Buick and looked in the backseat at all the stuff.

“Man that looks like a lot of fun for two people,” said Rosemary as she looked at the pile of riches.

“You have no idea, Rosemary, my head was spinning like crazy,” said Amo as she put on a handful of gold and diamond studded necklaces.

Grega picked up a handful of gold bars and his eyes lit up.

Pat smiled and put on a pair of designer sunglasses, life was good.