Chapter 21
Say ‘GOODBYE’ to Your Fear of Love
Fear is a major obstacle in every relationship and identifying the fear becomes quite tricky at times. Nevertheless, if you do not recognize your fears, you will never succeed in attracting a healthy and happy relationship into your life.
Trouncing the fear of love…..
The good news is that you defeat your absurd fear of love. The first step is to identify that you are a philophobic. Once you are sure that you have philophobia, it becomes easy to find the right solution. Relationship experts opine that the only person you can transform or control in any relationship is yourself.
Once you embrace the feeling of love, you will automatically transform a major part of your groundless fear. So start conquering this fear right now by allowing the amazing emotions of love, fondness, affection and thoughtfulness into your life.
Simultaneously, do not prevent yourself from showing and showering your feelings of love for other person. This is very important; because only when you express your love to another person, it becomes easy for him or her to reciprocate mutual affection.
IS YOUR PAST HAUNTING YOU?
Once you gain the confidence of falling for someone, your past may start haunting you again. In such situations, always reassure yourself that now you are wiser than you used to be. Comfort yourself with the thought that your past with all its bitter lessons is gone and the wise decision for you would be to move on rather than brooding over it. At the same time, think positive and remind yourself that the person you are falling in love with is a different individual and your current situation is also much different from that of the past. Now that you are prepared for a new beginning, take the first step and approach the person you are in love with; it is going to be worth it, for sure! On the other hand, you may also seek counseling from a psychotherapist or discuss your fears with someone you trust; because it is said that discussing your inner fears is the best way to face your fear.
ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT THE FUTURE?
If you are continually anxious about the future of your relationship, and have been spending a considerable time and energy brooding over questions such as—“What if this relationship does not work out in future?”, “What if he/she betrays me in the long run?”, it is time to reassure yourself that the energy and effort that you put into a relationship never goes in vain. Always remind yourself that love opens your mind and each relationship that you enter into, teaches valuable life lessons about yourself as well as others.
Keep in mind that you are not the only person in this world who is apprehensive about love. You will perceive this as and when you start mingling with different people. Once you get together with likeminded individuals, you will gradually notice that your thought process is undergoing a positive change. So liberate yourself from the chains of fear and fall in love with a partner who is emotionally close to you, one who cares for you; someone who helps you grow, and will stand by you through thick and thin. You can find such a partner only when you interact more with people you get to know every day. Allow yourself to fall in love by leaving your fear of love far behind.