4. Faith in trusting the choices that lead to change
I know when I have a problem and have done all I can to figure it out I keep listening from a sort of inside silence until something clicks and I feel a right answer – Conrad Hilton
If 98% of behavior/thoughts are automatic, how do I trust myself not to be continually thinking in the same old well-worn grooves? It's easier not to think and to just stay in the same pattern. But if you truly have decided on change and want this to happen, you're going to have to stop those automatic, ceaseless thoughts and refill your head with thoughts of your own choosing. Well can this be done? Have faith that it can be. Your job here is to identify what your beliefs are and to take action to change the ones that limit you.
For one full day just step back and just look at your raging thoughts. You've got work to do in there, you've got constant sexual thoughts, mood swings, anger – in fact what haven't you got? Can your life really change with this flood inside your head constantly swirling? No! While this continues your life will be the same random mess it has always been.
Take five deep breaths. In – out, in – out. Stop and allow yourself this space. Well, do you want to stop this constant splash inside your head or not? After the breaths, think “I am taking control here”. Then continue with these thoughts:
– of a very beautiful place and time in your life. This will allow you the start of peace and a little space in your life.
I remember the happiest time in my life was when we were kids and being taken for afternoon tea to my grandmother's house, where we could play for hours with our cousins. I've never had that much space or freedom again.
Anytime you need to have a little peace even for a few minutes, think of this special time and take your mind back. You'll feel much better when you return. The situation you needed to escape from just doesn't seem as bad somehow.
– of what your really want in your life and consequently need to focus on. I suddenly realized my belief was that life was hard and always would be.
This spilled over to my whole life – business, relationships, money. How could my life ever be happy when everything stemmed from this basic premise? I wanted to change this belief but how?
Identifying this as needing change is the first big step. The next is to look at how this limits you and how you can break free.
Business – just look at where you work, your client base and decide on how you want this to change. Of course money will enter here. Ultimately you'll probably decide to work less, earn less, accumulate less but consume more enjoyable activities such as travel and time with family and friends.
Relationships – you want more friends and someone special to enter your life. You want more harmony with present family and friends now. You've tried to change things often but always the same pattern has persisted.
– Of filling your life with happy thoughts instead of the usual negative dross
Wipe out life is hard. Everytime it enters your mind replace it with the thought, “Life is easy for me”.
Business – I am climbing the career ladder and will continue to move forward. I am growing my business due to my focused ideas and new clients are consequently being attracted. It's creating a surfeit of money. I know who I am and as such am a powerful being. You and I are one.
Relationships – I've met a lot of new friends lately including a life partner. My family are thrilled and definitely creating a little space there has helped old sores to heal. They relate better to the new more peaceful and successful me. The old aggro individual has started to drop away. Life is definitely easier.
– as soon as swirling thought enters your mind start to drain them
“I'm so angry with John about last night. I'm never listened to, at home or work and it infuriates me.” Open the festering wound and allow it to heal – dump the word angry from your mind and then dump the whole situation. Allow the soothing balm of distancing yourself from that thought, to start to heal the problem. The anger has never helped rectify the problem so what's the point of hanging onto it? The only solution is for you to become more focused and centered, so your buttons aren't pushed as easily and for Me to help John notice the new you and not react in the same way. I'll help you if you choose to help yourself. Just ask.
Over a full day every time you think of something negative, change that thought to positive and see what kind of a difference that makes. Change that angry action to a smile and just let it go. Look back at the day's end and see if there has been a change within yourself and to your usual daily abrasive situations. Extend the day gradually into weeks and see if your whole life hasn't developed into something happier in the process.
– Believe your fears away
How can you have faith in your choices when often those choices are based on fear? Fear nibbles away at your strength and you have constant doubts. This in turn leads to frustration and no change occurs again. What are these fears anyway? Often lives are lived in constant anxiety, that person being unable to even name these fears.
Well you are not alone in these fears and have both the power and the means to rise above them. Use the greatest weapon you have access to in your life – faith. You can either be defeated now, or continue on to victory and a better life for yourself and those around you. Remember you are not alone – I am you as you are Me and together we can overcome anything. You have huge reserves of strength now to overcome anything. Don't let fear of failure stop you from trying at all. How could you fail now you know who you really are! All you hidden strengths are coming to the fore: energy, sound judgment, creative ideas and endurance. Harness these to carry you through that temporary weak place in your mind. And unless you're hopelessly unqualified, you will deliver. Go on extend yourself and be willing to take a chance!