Personal Coaching Techniques by Dean Amory - HTML preview

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INTRODUCTION

Welcome on board! We are starting here. There are three things

that you need for starting a biz. You need a vision, you need a

powerful lever to go ahead and finally you need an innovative

idea.

In this first course, we shall show you how to use mental imagery

for training your subconscious in order to be successful in your

business life. Mental imagery is the first step in the visioning

process.

Of course, it's quite difficult to explain how mental imagery

works. There are not any scientific explanations of these

techniques of training. It does not mean that you must not use

them.

For example, you think every day. However, there is not yet any

scientific explanation about the consistency of the thought.

Consequently, you have just to apply a lot of recipes: Experience

shows that they usually succeed.

1-IMAGE RESOURCE AND RELAXATION

We shall show you how to create your image resource and how

to use it for relaxing but before going any further, you have to

find out your preferred sensory method.

11-Discover your best sensory method

Anyone has a preferred method of perception: people are indeed

above all sensitive:

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either to what they see (visual)

or to what they hear (auditory)

or what they feel or touch.

To determine your preferred method of perception, you will

make the following exercise.

Firstly, here is a list of words. Ask someone to read them to you

while you are doing the exercise.

A dance

A kitchen Tulips

A street

A valley

Courage

An apple

A lake

Thunder

An ink pot A forest

A castle

Wine

A T-shirt Jazz

Freedom

A river

A meeting

An office Money

A leather chair

As soon as you hear the word, tick straight away the column that

seems to best correspond to what comes immediately into your

mind:

If an image appears, if you see something in your mind, tick the

column V. If you hear a sound or if you repeat the word in your

mind, tick A. If you feel a physical sensation or find a taste or

smell, tick G.

V

A

G

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*

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

Look at the column that is ticked the most. This is your preferred

sensory method. Also observe the one that you have only ticked

rarely. This is without doubt the sensory method that you use

the least. Obviously in the above example, the man who has

ticked is a "visual" and secondary an "auditory".

This knowledge of your best sensory method will help you for

building your image resource.

12-Choose your image resource

-Definition: The image resource is a mental image that is to say

an image that you see in your mind when your eyes are closed.

This image resource is the memory of a pleasant situation that

you have really experienced in the past.

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With this banal memory, you have a work to do for transforming

it in a strong mental image which is able to make you relive the

feelings that you had experienced in the past.

For example, when you have had a painful experience and when

you remember it, you feel again, in a weaker way, the feelings

that you had already experienced :you shudder again

retrospectively, you go pale.

On the contrary, thanks to your image resource, you should

remember your past pleasant feelings and try to live them again

as intensely as possible. I mean that your first task is to choose

among the flow of your memories, one very pleasant which can

fill up some characteristics:

-Your image resource must be a very pleasant image.

-Your image resource must be a very quiet image. Consequently,

avoid very moving images such as a dance party or a meeting. A

situation where you are alone and at rest must be favoured.

Down earth advice

Many persons choose the memory of a river as image resource. It

could be a good choice because it gives a feeling of quietness.

Mountains and green meadows could be also very effective.

You must have a strong feeling of identity with your image

resource. For this reason, it's always better to choose it in an

environment where you have lived for a long time.

Once your image has been chosen, try to adapt it to your best

sensory method. If you are:

o more visual: increase the number of colors

o more auditory: plan for sounds, voices and pleasant melodies

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that you imagine hearing when looking at the mind-image

o more G: see yourself in your mental image touching things,

shaking hands and so on. Imagine smell and perfume and try

to live it.

You will use your image resource in many situations and first for

relaxing.

13-Relaxation techniques

You need to learn how to relax because relaxation is the first step

of many process in mental imagery and visioning. We shall give

you here our personal method that we experience everyday. Its

main advantage is to be easy to use with fast results.

Your image resource is the first thing that you need when you

are going to relax. Then you have to choose a quiet place for

example your bedroom. Make sure there is no noise to interrupt

your relaxation. Remain in half-darkness. Lie down if you are in

your bedroom or sit in a position that makes it easy to relax if

you are in an office.

When you are in this situation begin to relax:

-FIRST SEQUENCE

Close your eyes. Breathe as slowly and as regularly as possible.

Say the formula: I am perfectly calm

Imagine your image resource as we have defined it before: For

example, a river that flows in the countryside. Mentally develop

this image: Look at this image from all sides and try to relive

your feelings. It must occupy your whole mind so as not to leave

any room for other sensations or ideas.

-SECOND SEQUENCE.

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Say the following phrases with your inner voice: My left arm is

heavy, my two arms are heavy, my legs are heavy, my entire

body is heavy.

You should have a vision of your body sinking, disappearing. The

aim of this exercise is to make all bodily sensations fade away as

much as possible.

-THIRD SEQUENCE

Now let's your image resource disappearing. You should be in a

pre-sleep condition. Bodily feeling is reduced to its simplest

expression. You think of nothing. Your mind is empty.

THE DRAWING 2 ILLUSTRATES THE RELAXATION PROCESS:

As you can see, it's look quite easy. In fact you will need to train:

Practice this exercise, several times a day. When you have

mastered it, you will be able to reach this relaxed state almost

instantaneously: Count in your head from 10 to 1.

10 — 9 — 8 — 7 : carrying out the 1st sequence

6 — 5 — 4 — 3 : carrying out the second sequence

2 - 1 : carrying out the 3rd sequence.

By slowly pronouncing 10 — 9 — 8 — 7 up to 1, you will attain

the required state of relaxation. Count one month of exercise to

reach this automatic mastery.

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2-CLEANING THE SUBCONSCIOUS

Right now, you have to use your image resource and the

relaxation techniques for cleaning your subconscious from all

the negative beliefs which are coming from your past.

21-Analysing reality: Autobiography.

What do you do when you start a new day? You shower and you

wash your body. Now, you are starting a new life: You have to

clean your reality. Reality is made up of two things: Your past

and your present condition

Your present condition is influenced by your past. As the past no

longer exists, it is above all your memories that explain your

current state. You are going therefore to examine your past or

more precisely the memories and beliefs that you have of it.

Take a pen and paper and write down your life from the

beginning. Write down your life chronologically, breaking it

down into distinct periods: Childhood, learning period, studies,

first job etc. Analyze each period and look for:

• What you wanted at the time

• What was your most outstanding feeling

For example, look at the following imaginary autobiography of a

young man that we shall call John:

1970-1975: I don’t remember much of my early childhood. I had 2

brothers and 3 sisters. My mother was very busy. My father came home

late and beat us. My little brother was very funny. We had good times

together. My sister brought me up and dealt with us, but she complained

all the time. I don’t have good memories of this period because of my

father.

1975-1987: I started primary school. I learned to read, write and count

quickly. My teacher was very nice. Later, I wanted to be a building

engineer. Overall, I have good memories of school.

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1987-1993: I went to high school. I had great difficulty with literature. In

1990, I went to a vocational to become an accountant. I had no friends

and the other students who were often older than me mocked me. I have

very bad memories of this period.

1993-2000: I did my military service in the Navy. I liked the open-air life

and the sports a lot. After military service, I found a job as a clerk in an

insurance company. I don’t earn much money and I experience a mediocre

life. I don’t go out much, I have few friends and I don’t have much fun.

Make a table to use this analysis:

Periods Would you like to relive this period Why?

70 — 75 NO

75 — 87 YES

87 — 93 NO

93-2000 YES IN NAVY AND NO AFTER

Analyze carefully the answers to these questions and look for the

true reason. In the periods that you do not like, carefully isolate

the past experiences and feelings which were particularly

unpleasant. Above all, don’t hide anything. As with a psy, recall

the shameful events. Tell the truth and the truth will free you.

Make a list of these events and prepare you to neutralize them.

22-Use image resource: Association-Dissociation

It's a well known fact that our present behavior is often linked to

negative experiences in your past. You have written your

autobiography and carefully isolated the unpleasant events.

Now, you will neutralize these negative experiences.

Just as you wipe data from your computer’s hard disk, removing

unnecessary programs, you should wipe your subconscious,

removing all the memories of negative experiences.

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The first step is to relax. Consequently, do the three sequence of

the former exercise. When you are fully relaxed, you imagine a

mental screen just like a television screen.

Imagine that you Turn on your screen just like a television and

relive the negative experience. Vision the image of the

experience and relive your painful feelings (humiliation, shame,

rage). In this state, you are fully associated to this negative past

experience.

Now, disassociate yourself: Put yourself in the position of an

independent observer of the previous image. Watch yourself act

as if you were someone else. It is no longer you on the screen, it

is your double! You are just a spectator of what you were doing.

Let this dissociated image takes over your mental screen.

The black square shows the negative experience when you are

reliving it. It's quite painful. The gray square shows the same

experience when you have dissociated from it.

On this mental screen, imagine a small square where you look at

and relive your image resource (the flowing river for example).

Relive it to the maximum leaving the rest of the screen occupied

by the negative experience from which your were dissociated.

Enlarge the square of your image resource on the mental screen

so that the image of the unpleasant experience disappears

completely. It will disappear quickly because you are now fully

associated with your image resource.

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On the drawing, the little blue square represents your image

resource which is then enlarged to occupy your entire screen.

Proceed like that for all the unpleasant events you have listed. By

the end, you will completely clean up your past and your

subconscious.

Be very careful with the people that were witnesses to your

negative experiences. Each time you meet them, you can expect

they will remind you of those negative periods: "Do you

remember when you made us laugh with your exam? and so on"

The cleaning work will be called into question each time you

meet them. With a simple look, they will reinstall all your

negative beliefs. Only one solution : Don’t see them any more,

avoid them, eliminate all witnesses to your past lack of success.

23-Surf on troubles

Whatever you do, you will come across difficult experiences in

your current situation. For example, you know that an event will

go badly. For avoiding to built up a new negative experience, you

will cross the event as if you were outside it, as if you were not

concerned.

For this purpose, you will use the anchoring method that relies

on using a stimulation (image or gesture) that automatically

provokes an internal representation. For example: Seeing a

blackboard (visual anchor) inspires classroom memories.

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Listening to a song inspires memories of a party (auditory

anchoring) .

The stimulation may be visual : remove your glasses, auditory :

listen to a song, kinesthetic: Tighten your fists. Its aim is to

produce when needed the desired emotional state to deal with a

given situation.

For implementing an anchoring, use the following technique:

As soon as you have reached the relaxation stage, keep it and

associate a simple movement with your image resource, like for

example, clenching the fist. Restart the operation as often as

possible to create a conditioned reflex.

Subsequently, each time that you need your image resource,

clench your fist. This gesture will help you to find it, without

having to put yourself in a relaxed state.

When you are confronting a painful event, clench your fist, call

your image resource. Focus on your image resource and cross

the event as though it did not concern you. When the event is

finished, all that will remain is a dissociated image and not an

associated one that would harm your subconscious.

You have not to be involved in unpleasant events. With your

image resource, you surf on the events that you do not like!

24-Now rewrite your life!

When you have cleaned your past, you can re-write your

personal history eliminating all the negative periods and

experiences. This is the history with which you will confront

immediate reality. Rather than pulling yourself back, this history

will push you forward.

Clean the past and the John 's history becomes:

1970-2000: I had some good times with my younger brother. I

learned quickly and easily at primary school. The Navy gave

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me a lot of self-confidence. I am very good at sports and open-

air life. I am working for a short period in a financial office. I

am making the most of this job to learn some tips useful for

starting a biz: I want in the next future to create my own

sports business. I am confident: I will enjoy a success story!

Obviously, John must eliminate his bad witnesses: He must not

see any more his father, his elder sister who complained all the

time or his colleagues at the vocational school. On the contrary,

he must get in touch with his brother, his teacher and colleagues

of Navy.

Positive beliefs make you see reality as a spring to success. Right

now, you are free to choose your vision and that vision will

transport you in a successful world.

External readings

Go to http://mentalhelp.net . Click on "psychological self help".

There is a complementary reading about what you have just

learnt. You can also click on "tests" to realize some psychological

tests.

Lesson summary

The knowledge of your best sensory method will help you for

building your image resource: Your image resource is a mental

image that is to say an image that you see in your mind when

your eyes are closed.

This image resource is the memory of a pleasant situation that

you have really experienced in the past.

You will use your image resource in many situations and first for

relaxing and for cleaning your subconscious from all the negative

beliefs which are coming from your past.

Once, you have cleaned your past, you can re-write your

personal history eliminating all the negative periods and

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experiences. Rather than pulling yourself back, this history will

push you forward.

DO IT YOURSELF:

You have a lot of things to do:

1-First, you must write your autobiography. We recommend you

to reread your bio the day after a good night. Do the job in one

shot during a week-end when you are not disturbed. Look at

your old photos. They could ease the remembrance process.

Count about 5 hours of full work for this task

2-Make the exercise about the sensory preference and then,

choose your image resource. In writing your bio, you have

certainly isolated an event that you would like to relive. Describe

completely your image resource. If possible, paint it. Count at

least 5 hours for the choice of your image resource.

3-Then, begin the relaxation exercises as described above: Each

day, practice 4 exercises during 15 days. As each exercise could

last 15 minutes, it means that you have to plan 15 hours of

training within these two weeks. Do not go to the visioning

module as long as you are not able to relax in the way we have

explained

4-Mastering your image resource, you have to eliminate the

negative experiences. You should need about five days for

eliminating them but the duration depends on your life. In the

same way, use the anchoring process and also begin to avoid

people bearing negative influence. Count about 8 hours to

perform the Tasks.

5-Finally, rewrite your life ( Count only 2 hours as you mainly

write an abstract)

It means that all these tasks need about 35 hours within a month.

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When all these tasks have be done, you can enter in the visioning

course.

VISIONING