5. Never do what you don't want to do
So a girl who I hook up with every once in a while invites me to go to this hick bar downtown and I say sure what the hell. The place is a real piece of trash but there are a lot of big breasted women wearing cowboy boots and hats so I figure at the very least I get a free beer and get to see some hot girls.
We have some wine at her place before we head out and things are going pretty well. I'm wearing a trucker hat, these salmon colored golf shorts, flip flops, my trademark grandpa-glasses, and a shirt that says “The world’s greatest dad” in all caps. Needless to say, I did not fit in.
But hey, dressing like I'm heading to NASCAR or to the ranch just isn't my thing.
She buys me a drink and we sit at a table. It seems like there is a hoedown or some BS going on that night, and I can tell that she is itching to dance. I do not like dancing, and I have no idea how to two-step or square dance or whatever the hell they were doing, so I had already decided there was no way I was getting up.
Like clockwork, after about 2 beers she asks me if I want to go dance.
“Nope.”
“Aw, come on. It would be fun!”
“Ain’t happening.”
“Aw, are you scared? You big wussy.”
“I’m terrified. Hey, look, there is some old dude looking over here who can’t wait to get his hands on you. Go ask him if he wants to dance.”
“Whatever.”
She gets up and heads to the middle of the room where the dancing is going on. I look over to my left and see this cute couple of girls with some dude. They seem really drunk and I can tell I’ll be bored if I just sit by myself, so I say “Hey guys! My date just went dancing and I don’t know the cotton-eyed Joe or whatever it is they are doing out there. I need someone to pass the time with until she gets back. Have a seat, we'll all have a drink.”
They do, because if you are drunk and you are standing around and you are wearing heels, you want to sit down.
We start talking and one of the girls is sitting really close to me and we start talking about whatever. I look up and see my date dancing with that same creepy looking old dude and just start laughing.
She sees me laughing at her and runs over, obviously jealous that I already found someone to replace her. She starts talking about how terrible it was on the dance floor and how she shouldn’t have gone, and obviously wants to sit down, but can’t because there is a girl sitting next to me. I tell her to go buy me a beer.
Those other people eventually go do whatever it is they came to the bar to do and my date finally sits down next to me and loves it and one thing leads to another. I won't bore you with the details.
***
Moral of the story? Do whatever you want. You don’t have to compromise.
Look, I hate dancing. I just don’t like it, so I don’t do it unless I’m really drunk. She thinks she can get me up by insinuating that I’m somehow less of a man if I don’t get up right that instant and go dance with her, which is ludicrous, so I just make fun of her.
When she realizes that I don’t care at all if she is dancing with some other dude and that I’m not going to get jealous, suddenly it isn’t fun anymore.
Not only that, but she was replaced in a matter of seconds.
But you don't have to just apply this to dancing and you don't have to be a sociopath to do this. You have the right to do what you want, not what a girl wants you to do.
And think about it this way: pretty girls get what they want all the time. If you do what they want because they want it or even after a little goading then you fall into the category of "guys who will get rejected tonight".
Do you really believe girls think those kind of guys are sexy? Do you think they are getting laid? No way! Beautiful women find that boring, with a capital "B". Women want someone who breaks their routine, because as much as they abuse this power, it's really not exciting for them.
A woman wants you to have a strong will, a strong sense of what you want, and a willingness to just totally disregard her ideas if you think yours are better. It's sexy to them.
Think about it from this angle: you will be more energetic, more interesting, and more passionate doing something that you actually want to be doing. It's as simple as that. All of those attributes are sexy to women, and they come out the clearest when you are doing what you want.
But you should really be doing this for you. You will enjoy your date more if you don't have to grin and bear it. If you do what you want, you will be having more fun. It's as plain as could be. Not only that, but women will have more fun if you are having more fun.
Now, that doesn't mean you should never compromise. Sometimes it just doesn't matter to you what you do. Asian or Italian for dinner? If you don't care, don't make a fuss, because if you do that enough times you just look like an asshole. But if you genuinely don't want to do something, or would rather do something else, do that instead and don't ever feel bad about it.