One month clear.
I am over a month without smoking as I write this and have no complaint from any real withdrawals and the fog has certainly cleared.
My mistake of trying to incorporate marijuana into every aspect of my life, and then to seek an acceptance from friends and family that was impossible to gain.
The preacher behavior often seen with pot users is a method of attempting to gain support the and acceptance they rarely achieve.
In a time of immediate social media and constant CCTV coverage we have to adjust to the reality that 'I was high' was similar to 'I was drunk'.
On a personal note Twitter, FB all social media and cameras are quite incriminating and are always best avoided whilst under the influence of pot and publication of selflies should be forbidden.
Capturing via video or photo moment can give some self reflection in times of sobriety as the famous David Hasslehoff moment captured by his daughters of him eating a burger whilst drunk was a strong motivator for his eventual rehabilitation.
A primary reality for me is that I have fiscal pressures that cause great concern whilst I had hoped to start a career as a lobbyist promoting the Green agenda but this has no real place in modern society.
The lack of commercial entities to sponsor this campaign has left me hanging in the wind struggling to self-feed.
Its bizarre that those currently benefiting financially from prohibition are definitely not interested in the legalization movement and see it as Governments taxing their business and flooding the supply side of the market.
As it stands if marijuana were legalized tomorrow how would that actually impact me personally?
I have to admit that having taken a month away from marijuana I am happier my life is taking distinct path to improvement.
My daily moods are much better and I have to accept that I took my habit to an unhealthy level of use and to the line of addiction and dependency.
As it stands I don't intend on smoking it again ever.
I would not advise anyone take their use to that level and would expect it have distinctly negative impact on their lives if they smoke all day every day.
Also mixing a personally challenging period of my life with a drug dependency made it worse.
If I could impart any advice to pot smokers it would be don't let it get in the way of your financial situation or mix it with the difficult and challenging job interviews and work.
I personally have not found any jobs that embrace the use of dope.
A strong sense of conflict still exists personally after advocating ending of criminal punishment for the use of a plant but concurrently highlighting that I used it to my detriment.
Social stigma is still attached to drug use and my personal issue is a well-intended social experiment has backfired.
Perhaps the fantasy of living a life in harmony with pot and finding a healthy balance of recreational use cannot be achieved.
More primary pressures like fiscal independence, the current social stigma and stereo typical lazy stoner association will not help find work or business solutions.
I now feel the health benefits, flexibility, anti-inflammatory aspects, increased appetite and sleep improvement are primarily the reserves of holiday / weekend activities.
Maslow's hierarchy of needs; food, water, housing and security all essentially are very competitive realms and drug users are rarely rewarded for their disconnect but they fall into the poverty trap.
My primary warning is that it can be something you fall in love with- literally.