My first day of high school was one of the worst days of my life. I didn’t like any of my classes or any of my teachers. I didn’t have any friends.
Michael was there, but I only saw him once during the day, and we couldn’t think of much to say to each other.
At the end of school that day, I stared at my homework assignments. The thought of even trying to do them was more than I could handle. I threw all my books in my locker, slammed it shut, and ran all the way to the Grove.
Dulcy had left me a mushroom, and I left her the $20 bill I had promised.
I dragged myself along for a few weeks. Then one day I was told I had to go to the counselor’s office. She was a big, ugly woman who started by informing me that she would be my counselor all through high school. She sat in a big wooden chair behind her desk, and I sat in a little plastic one in front.
I felt like I was five years old again.
“So, Ariel, I see here that you aren’t doing too well in your classes. Any of them.”
I just stared at the floor. Tears were very close.
“Don’t you want to succeed in school? You’re a smart young lady. Your verbal I.Q. is 160, numeric 120. You could go to college, get a master’s degree, maybe even a doctorate. What can we do to get you started?”
“Leave
me
alone.”
“What?”
I looked at her. I felt the tears start to roll down my cheeks. She obviously didn’t want me to cry, so I stopped. She said some other things, but I couldn’t hear her. After a while she handed me a new class schedule and told me to go home early. I went to the Grove.
My new classes were all for dumb kids, and the other kids were either retarded or almost drop-outs. I fit in pretty well. The last little bit I cared about school disappeared.
It was almost Halloween, and Michael told me the Grove was planning to go to all the Haunted Houses, carve jack-0-lanterns, and then eat dinner at the Grove. I started to look forward to it. It sounded like fun, and there wasn’t much of that left in my life, even though I was eating mushrooms all the time.
The day before Halloween my dad told me I had to stay home because of my bad school work. All day at school on Halloween I just stared at the walls.
I felt trapped and every day I seemed to get more trapped. I tried to figure out why, I really did, but I couldn’t break through the fog. The only thing I could figure out was that somehow it was very important for me to stay with the Grove. I didn’t know why, I just had to.
For the first time in my life, I defied my parents. I went with the others to the Haunted Houses, then to the Grove. When I tried to carve a pumpkin, I discovered that my hands were shaking too much. But I was in a good mood, so I tended the fire and watched the others make jack-o-lanterns.
I was very glad when school ended for 2 weeks in December. I hadn’t quite flunked out. In my new easy classes, I got one C, two D’s, and one F. My parents hadn’t said anything about Halloween, and they didn’t say anything about my grades. But they looked very sad.
During Christmas vacation, I went to the Grove a lot to get away from people. Dulcy told me she couldn’t get any more mushrooms until next spring. I soon finished the container of wine that Issa kept at the Grove. After that, I took to wandering around town, spending money on anything that looked interesting. I had spent almost $200 on mushrooms, and I probably blew another $150 to get me through vacation.
When school started again, I made a new friend. She was in one of my classes, but I think she was in some normal classes too. She slipped a wad of paper into my hand one day as we were going to lunch. I could feel something inside, but I waited until I was alone to open it up. The paper said FREE
SAMPLES, and inside were several pills of different colors.